It’s only half the week and it sounds like you’ll get the opportunity to also walk him to / from school which you don’t currently…

Having done the working away thing as well make sure you plan some stuff to avoid too much time in an apartment by yourself. Run / bike / swim etc in the evenings.

I guess it depends on what you can square with your wife but personally I’d be all over Oslo for a couple of years.
NB I don’t have a wife.

Having said that I’m not going to the moon and I don’t really see him that much during the week anyway.

Exactly, three evening a week where you will only be missing the last hour of his day anyway (when he’s tired and grumpy half the time anyway)
And you will be gaining two evenings when you can pick him up from school and go to the park and mess about for the whole evening.

Sounds like a win to me.

OP I used to leave the house at 6:30 and get back between 7 and 8 on the nights I didn’t have a client dinner. I was away on trips maybe 1 week in 4 and often these involved weekend travel. You say yourself you don’t see the kids that much mid week. With this deal you see them Fri-Mon, can do the school run. I’d take the Oslo gig, leave Tue very early and work late Tue/Wed and fly back Thu after work. If it turns oit to be a great move mabe Mrs W will join and if it’s a bit rubbish you can look for another job and/or ask for voluntary redundancy at a later date ?

Thanks to all for the comments – I’m going to sleep on it as they say!

I’d take the job, but I’d also be aware that Oslo can probably be a bit lonely on a dark wet night when all your colleagues have gone home to their families and you have either work or an empty flat.

It sounds like you’ve nothing to lose by giving it a go. I lived abroad and wouldn’t have missed it for anything, though that didn’t involve a split life.

Have a got chat with the company and your wife… Give it a go.

Look a bit further ahead, could this be a stepping stone to live in a different country? The U.K. Isn’t looking too appealing as an expat now living in Germany.. I’ll not be going back.

Taking what seems a good redundancy may not create the same family opportunities going forward

Tuesday to Thursday is fine, you will miss virtually nothing. I did that type of thing for years. That said I too redundancy in Dec as they tried to make me do more away from home and at my own expense. It does make it harder to do your own stuff, ie long rides on a Sunday though. Glad to be back to a 30 min commute and living on edge of Dale’s..

If it’s a decent place you are going to then planning stuff to do away from the family will feel like a break.

Having lived in Oslo (and now Stavanger) I can honestly say its a great city. Work/ life balance over here is good and the quality of life is high

commute for a while and convince the family to move over

What does your wife think of the redundancy/3 days in Oslo options?
In reality her support/acceptance of the new arrangements will be a major factor in whether it works or not.
FWIW I’d be trying the short week in Oslo option for a bit and then taking the redundancy if it wasn’t right for you all. I did a similar commute from Leeds into Dublin (I’m about an hour from Leeds Bradford airport) for 2 years, usually 2 days a week but often 3. It was manageable once we all settled into the routine.

As Wombat says above it very much depends on your wife and how she would feel being alone for a (relatively short) period each week. You also need to consider her career aspirations and make sure that she will not resent you doing this.

I worked away a lot whilst my daughter was young but also had periods at home. It was project work so more variable than what you describe. It worked ok but I missed out on a few things and sometimes getting to parents evening etc. was not possible. As long as your wife can cover this it should be ok (kids tend to just want someone to see their plays, assemblies etc. – two people is a bonus).

Personally I would go for it if I was comfortable that I could do the job effectively under the circumstances. No harm in trying if they have offered you a trial period.

FWIW my working life was a bit like Jamba describes, saw the kids mainly at the w/e as I was pretty much away Mon-Fri across Europe and the world.

They’re now all grown up.

Do any of us remember when I wasn’t there? Nope. We only remember when I was there.

I also was asked by the company to relocate (went to Germany). The youngest was 18 months and my wife gave up work. Only there a year but when it’s pretty much paid for and as there was the family we rented a nice house rather than a flat we had a good time.

Plus, when out there I travelled far less as I said I’m not moving and then still doing the same job, no point.

Looking back the time you need to be around is their teens, and for this I was. This is the testing time, especially with sons who are getting all ‘testrony’ with their Mum.

Could you do some of your Mon & Fri WFH stuff whilst sat in the hotel in Oslo on those midweek nights to make them lighter days?

My instinct would be to give it a go – at three days with a couple of extra days at home you’re likely to see more of your lad, not less, particularly if you can wangle the flexibility to do school pick-ups/teatime on the Monday and Friday.

At five, you may even come to decide that Norway is a far superior environment to be bringing up a kid.

Only skim read but sounds like company is being very acoommodating. Grab the opportunity for a new experience. They might not come along that often.

Never pass up the chance to live in a different country

Wife is supportive and happy for the commuting arrangement – it’s not like our son is a toddler and he is fairly low maintenance. Plus if it doesn’t work then the reducndancy option still exists

She thinks that taking the package now without giving this a go is the worst possible option – she knows that I will drive myself crazy and that you are better placed to get a job when you have one

My next steps are to give the work pattern a go next week to see if it feels a lot different to my current travelling and possibly see a career coach (paid for by the company) to see if they can give me any advice

Not read anything but the first post. Seems like a great deal to me, not sure why you are hesitating. Its only potentially 2 midweek nights in Oslo!

Working three days a week in another place is a pretty good way to go if you are already travelling there often. Having an apartment is the key, preferably close to work, as you have got your own space in the evenings and a short commute on a daily basis to make up for the big round trip once a week. Working from home for two days and not having to do head office trips anymore and you are ahead of the game in terms of commuting time.

The working experience can be much better too if you are working at head office because you can get things done face to face rather through interminable emails exchanges.

Add in the fun of discovering a new city and it is a great opportunity.

Obviously it is not just about you. My father was likewise in the forces and I was away at school, but because my father ensured he did most of his travelling and entertaining in term time, we saw a lot of him in the holidays. He was even home for lunch most days. It is what you make of the time together, not the quantity in my view.

The main issue is making sure your wife doesn’t feel she is carrying the burden of raising the kids on her own and stopping the potential resentment this can cause.

Lots of sound advice coming – I really appreciate it

I know that the company is bending over backwards to accommodate me, the work / life balance is generally good and the safety net is huge.

May be this is just too good to give up even if it is 3 nights away

I could be in the gig economy or working for another company that expects 50hrs a week and to be available on holidays etc

I notice lots of people extolling the virtues of Norway as a place to live. One of my best friends is Norwegian but has lived abroad from nearly 40 years. Whilst he is a proud Norwegian, there is no way he is ever going back there to live as he finds his fellow countrymen and women too provincial and small minded – he’s not too keen on us at the moment either post Brexit vote.

Likewise, a former member of my staff emigrated to Norway a few years ago, he is Australian and his wife is Norwegian. They used to go to Oslo for weekends all the time and he loved it. When he moved permanently, he hated it, he too found the working environment in finance compared to London, chippy and small minded. He lasted a year and they moved to Australia. They are now back in London as that works best them as a family.

Living in Oslo works for many as the posts on here show, but others have a different experience.

I found myself in a near identical situation 3 years ago, though swap Oslo for London (I’m in Edinburgh). I took the money and never looked back, I was lucky enough to walk straight into a job (Took 6 months to find it, but had been given extended notice period to provide cover for my successor) that I have loved ever since. I enjoyed the company I was in before but I’m now in an even better business, better role, better progression, better money.

I’m aware I am very lucky, and it won’t always be the case, but given your question was what would we do, that’s what I did and I never looked back.

Turning this around, someone is willing to pay you 18 months salary (first £30k tax free) to not take a job (which you aren’t very sure about). That is a very temping offer no?

Unless your work is ultra niche most jobs need pretty much the same base skill set and so the betting is getting another job won’t be much of a challenge. That’s the bet YOU need to think about.

I’m writing this from perspective of someone who has been in same situation and yes I did take the money. One of the best decisions I ever made.

Take redundancy.
Await call asking you to go back as a contractor, 3 days a week in Oslo, Monday and Friday working from home.
Start contracting
Assume smug face.

I would do it without any doubt at all, sounds like a great opportunity. 3 nights per week of discomfort, in my opinion at least, is more than offset by 2 days working from home.

Do it for a couple of months, if it doesn’t work then you can use the 2 days at home to find another job and attend interviews.

Do the commute.

3 days a week is nothing.

They are bending over backwards to accommodate you and seem to be an outfit that really look after their people. Not many of them about anymore.

Accommodation and travel is going to cost them a significant amount. £500 – £800 a week? So they must value you. You would be mad not to stay.

I think the #firstworldproblem is very appropriate here. 🙂

What would your living arrangements in Oslo be ?

Hotel ? Or a staff house or a studio ?

Makes a big odds for me. Having some where to set up and call home for your 3 nights makes an odds.

I’ve done the living out a bag for 7years and recently moved to a job where I have a room in a house I can set up for me has lifted spirits alot. Makes it much easier to switch off and not just sit and work because there’s nowt else to do.

Next trip a bike and turbo trainer will be coming with me 🙂

I think we need some rough ballpark info here to give more informed feedback, including…

Age?
How many months would the redundancy payout cover, compared to the increased salary of the new role with half the week in Norway?
Partner working?
Are you as a family mortgaged up to the hilt?

If the payout is significantly above Statutory Redundancy Pay and you are under ~45, I’d be inclined to take the payout.

If there are no job opportunities in your field of expertise, should that be what you want to carry on doing in an ideal world, if you are reasonably fit you could always find a part-time job such as being a postman for 3 days per week while continuing the search (which would be ~£240 gross per week).

You could also, depending on the part-time job and if you are married, transfer some of your Income Tax allowance to your partner.
https://www.gov.uk/marriage-allowance/how-it-works

Also, there are plenty of people who spend weeks at a time offshore, on ships or in some God forsaken West African shithole to provide for their family. It’s a fact of life.

MTFU and do the commute

you’ve nothing to lose by giving it a go, for sure. i would explore at what point they want to know if you’ll make it permanent or not and still pony up the redundancy. i’d try for a 3 month trial and review at that time.

going forward i don’t think it’s a great time to be looking for a job TBH. the UK is going to be in the shitter for a while. IMO, of course.

good luck, whatever you decide.

Commute. No worse than commuting to somewhere in the UK (I used to do 3 days a week outside Manchester and it was better than my now daily commute).

I’ve got a staff member who commutes from Åland to Northampton – at least you’re going somewhere good!

Always worth checking in with the Mrs periodically to see if her opinion has changed too! She may well be going through a similar amount of to-ing and fro-ing as you are 🙂

I realised in my previous response I had missed this comment from you

They have said that if it doesn’t work out that they will still give the redundancy – I guess I would need to get that written down – that kind of makes it more straight forward

If this is genuinely the case then I see no reason not to try it. It will also give you some time to help search for new stuff, if you feel it’s not working out.

Haven’t read all the replies, but here’s my take:

I’ve spent the last 3 years doing M-W (sometimes M-T) working away from home. Now, admittedly, home is Lancashire and work is London, but it’s the same principle.

My daughter was 3 when I started and is now 6. My wife works very hard in a demanding job (we have the benefit of nearby family help).

Do I want to do it forever? No. Has it been an interesting experience? Yes. Would it make me comfortable working away again? Yep.

Short answer: do the commute and enjoy the experience.

I am 45 – so slap bang in the middle of career. I seem too old to change direction and too young to go for early retirement

Redundancy is above statutory minimum – around 18 months salary

Not mortgaged to the hilt – the redundancy would pay off the mortgage

Wife is working part time – she does the pick ups and drop offs with our son.

I know the best outcome would be to line up another job and take the money and run. However, I have been looking fairly hard since Christmas and nothing has come up.

I don’t relish the idea of unemployment given the state of the job market – my bell weather is a couple of people I know having been out unemployed for over a year. Whenever I see them they look like their stuffing has been knocked out and I don’t fancy that!

No, the best option is surely to enjoy Oslo for a while and see how it goes. If you think you can waltz into a better job locally and you’re actively hostile to the idea of spending some time abroad, then you can sort that out anyway over the next few months.

I’ll be the dissenting voice here then, as someone who did 3-4 days a week in various bits of Europe for a few years, and stopped because I got fed up with it.

In no particular order, on the commuting option:

1. I’d be very, very cautious about the offer of still getting redundancy after rejecting an extended trial period, as others have pointed out.

2. Logistics – when are you travelling? If they expect a full, normal day of work on Tu/W/Th then you’re most likely flying out on a Monday evening, and you’ll be home (very) late on Thursday.

3. Where are you officially based (Oslo?), and what does that mean for how you’re paid, tax implications, etc.

4. If they really want you there full time, expect some (attempts on) stretching of your week. Big important meeting on a Friday with someone who can only be on that day, will you be there? Deadline on a Tuesday, can you be in Monday to help? If they have decent remote working / conferencing tools it can easier to head off some of this but prepare for requests.

A mate does similar with Amsterdam 2 days a week (rest London or WFH) and finds it pretty hard going, and he lives very close to the airport (taxi from home to terminal is 10 mins), and a pretty easy journey the other end.

Unless you have super-niche untransferrable skills, I’d be biting their hands off at 18 months salary.

woody71 – Member
I am 45 – so slap bang in the middle of career. I seem too old to change direction and too young to go for early retirement

Redundancy is above statutory minimum – around 18 months salary

Not mortgaged to the hilt – the redundancy would pay off the mortgage

Wife is working part time – she does the pick ups and drop offs with our son.

I’d definitely take the redundancy payment based on above, especially as the mortgage would be paid off, without mortgage or rent your normal family monthly outgoing will be slashed.

Thats a bloody good package and I took a years salary, and then a slightly lower paid job. But I took the view it would take me 10 years to earn back the difference and by that time I’ve earned/saved interest by getting the payout. I’d seriously consider it! I did find my new job 2 days before the individual consultation process started though..