• This topic has 108 replies, 53 voices, and was last updated 14 years ago by hora.
Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 109 total)
  • What to get the girlfriend as she's going to uni?
  • JCornford
    Full Member

    I thoguht I should get her a little something as she's off to uni, even thoguh it's not actually that far away but my brain has turned to mush, any ideas?

    CaptainFlashheart
    Free Member

    Are you sure you're prepared for the sort of answers you're about to get?

    grynch
    Free Member

    *pulls up a chair* this should be good.

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

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    AndyP
    Free Member

    I wouldn't bother. She's unlikely to be your girlfriend much longer.

    iDave
    Free Member

    wot andy said

    crispybacon
    Free Member

    One of these……………

    mrsflash
    Free Member

    shall I be the first to suggest large box of condoms? 😉

    pcb
    Free Member

    DIY chlamydia test kit?

    binners
    Full Member

    a book token? I hear they're quite expensive and leave less funds for alcopops and ecstacy

    mooman
    Free Member

    I was going to suggest a dildo. But I guess she`ll be getting enough of the real thing there anyways.

    kimbers
    Full Member

    mrmichaelwright
    Free Member

    a train ticket to go and visit perennial forum pervert SFB, that should put her off men just long enough to want to see you again after 3 years and touch nothing in between.

    chvck
    Free Member

    A book token is a good idea despite how unexciting it is.

    BigDummy
    Free Member

    Aren't you divorcing your wife for her? What else could she possibly want? 😯

    Oh, of course, condoms….

    Stoner
    Free Member

    A divorce?

    … no, wait, that's already sorted

    You like an uncomplicated life, dont you?
    😉

    Edit: Damn! Beaten by the Lawyer. One sniff of a divorce and they're in there like a shot!

    JCornford
    Full Member

    I realised what the responses would all be as soon as I clicked send post, now I'm going to pull up a chair and laugh, or am I not allowod to do that? Should I be getting all defensive lol.

    roper
    Free Member

    ski
    Free Member

    some decent coffee?

    pcb – Member

    DIY chlamydia test kit?

    That would be on my list as a returning pressie 😉

    mrmichaelwright
    Free Member

    JCornford – i'd at least get a little bit upset, does the baying throng good to smell a little blood

    JCornford
    Full Member

    Stoner, life would be boring without a few complications, but no they are two completely seperate things.

    JCornford
    Full Member

    Good point Michael…….

    HOW DARE YOU IMPLY SUCH THINGS

    Do you think that's sufficent? I even used the caps lock.

    coffeeking
    Free Member

    Your girlfriend and your divorce are completely seperate things? I find that hard to understand lol.

    I too would suggest the chastity belt.

    JCornford
    Full Member

    Well the first was in the pipeline and paper work had been bought etc before the second one turned up, it's just taken me months to find it all after moving house.

    BigDummy
    Free Member

    Oh, OK. Then it would be quite romantic to hire someone to have your wife killed, just to really make the point that you love your girlfriend. 🙂

    grynch
    Free Member


    The rubber ducky that's just a little bit fowl. This cute little bath companion will bring a smile to your face. How clever to take a standard rubber ducky, insert a powerful vibrating waterproof motor and suddenly bath time just became a lot more interesting and productive. I mean, honestly, what else are you going to do? There's only so much staring at the ceiling in a candlelit bathroom while listening to Enya that normal people are prepared to do.

    Now you can just reach over and grab your little discrete Ducky, and umm, "cough" use it's powerful vibrating action to soothe your tired muscles. Which is what it's for. Really.

    http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/luv-duck/index.html

    no again wait..she'll be going to Uni… once again no need.

    JCornford
    Full Member

    Maybe this could be an activity we could enjoy together before she goes away?

    mrmichaelwright
    Free Member

    you can get a rubber fetish version of that duck, far filthier 🙂

    grynch
    Free Member

    activity we could enjoy = are you referring to the rubber duck or having your wife killed?

    JCornford
    Full Member

    I wrote that before the duck appeared.

    grynch
    Free Member

    *L*, sick man, sick, sick

    simonralli2
    Free Member

    Ok, what about a nice bag to carry her books, files etc in, a dictaphone or tape recorder for recording lectures, a cappucino machine as she will be staying up late studying, or maybe one of those cheap laptop computers that are 10" or less which she can carry around more eaily than a big laptop?

    Or are these ideas too sensible?

    tankslapper
    Free Member

    Dictaphone?!!! No, I use my finger like everyone else?!

    Sensible? Non?! 😀

    guitarmanjon
    Free Member

    A compact camera so she can record all the fun she's having (without you…sorry, had to throw that in, in the spirit of the thread).

    badblood
    Free Member

    to stop her getting sore

    JCornford
    Full Member

    Good save guitarmanjon other wise that could have been a nice thoughtful reply.

    Ha ha ha this is keeping me amused on an otherwise boring day.

    grynch
    Free Member

    does she like music?.. a copy of the Eagles greatest hits…
    Lyin' Eyes
    (D. Henley, G. Frey)

    City girls just seem to find out early
    How to open doors with just a smile
    A rich old man and she won't have to worry
    She'll dress up all in lace and go in style

    Late at night, a big ole house gets lonely,
    I guess every form of refuge has it's price
    And it breaks her heart to think her love is only
    Given to a man with hands as cold as ice.

    So she tells hims he must go out for the evening
    To comfort an old friend who's feeling down
    But he knows where she's going as she's leaving
    She's headed for the cheatin' side of town.

    tankslapper
    Free Member

    How about a good study guide?

    CaptJon
    Free Member

    Ok, what about a nice bag to carry her books, files etc in, a dictaphone or tape recorder for recording lectures, a cappucino machine as she will be staying up late studying, or maybe one of those cheap laptop computers that are 10" or less which she can carry around more eaily than a big laptop?

    Or are these ideas too sensible?

    It has been a while since you went to uni, right?

    A bag to carry her books – lol, she'll be in the first year (i assume) and most students don't discover the library until way into their second year.

    Dictafone – that will be useful for the first two weeks. After that student realise that a) the recordings are useless and b) listening back takes time out of sleep/drinking time.

    LOL @ up late studying and who needs coffee when pro-plus is so cheap.

    Netbooks are only useful if the computer will be carried about alot – so the library for example… as if.

    Yours,
    a cynical lecturer preparing for the start of term.

    mrchrispy
    Full Member

    Dictaphone?
    she'll be getting enough but I doubt she'll be using them on the phone.
    🙂

    simonralli2
    Free Member

    Oh flip – well I am sorry if that isn't the word I am looking for.

    For the record I could actually do with some sound recording equipment (I wont use that word again) for my field research for my MSc, as I am hoping to make both music recordings and interview people in Spanish where it will help to record in full in case of translation mistakes by myself at the time.

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