Following on from the ungrateful teenagers thread – what gift will make you die a little inside and force and smiley ‘thank-you’!

For me it’s biographies – I just hate them! All that ‘woe is me, look how awful my childhood was, and how awesome I’ve become’ twaddle.

At least the charity shop gets the benefit in the New Year.

Thankfully my previous bug-bear – the comedy DVD has fallen out of fashion!

I have dozens of these, unopened. No more, please.

No more, please.

I’m in my 40’s and a bit bah bumbug. So unless I can drink it, eat it or preferably share it, then it’s probably useless.

Here we go – found one of things that appear every year:

MIL has realised this year that they last really well – at least 10 years per bottle.

The crap that the lovely Mrs B’s family feel they need to put in a “stocking” for each of us. Crap like a keyring torch, some handkerchiefs, a crap screwdriver with interchangeable heads or a pair of mahoosive quilted gloves from sports direct that they thought “would be good for when I’m cycling”. I’ll also probably get yet another 2l bottle of Friedland balsamic vinegar from Costco because I once remarked that I liked balsamic vinegar.

Outdoor shoes! Wtf are outdoor shoes? They’re shoes that you leave by the back door for when you just need to nip outside. The charity shop has had them twice in four years – along with a 2inch thick plastic wallet that has a handy LCD photo frame installed where you’d normally put useless things like your credit cards or driving licence…

Aaargh. Please stop wasting your money on crap!!!

A Cold

generally the people who have to give a gift to everyone. but couldn’t think of anything good for some people. so got you something silly. it’s just tat and a waste of resources. I know wine/ chocloates is a bit generic but at least i can enjoy it. WTF do i want with an executive desk toy.

Any gift at all will make me grumpy – I’ve been asking people for years not to buy me anything for birthday/Xmas etc and to make a donation to charity instead, please. Do they listen? Do they ****! “Ooh, you must want something?” – NO I BLOODY DON’T!!!!!

And breathe….

A jar of Humbugs! 😆

A seven dwarves plaster cast kit.

😆

Chocolate or sweets – ‘but you used to like them’ ‘yes when i was 12’
Blended whisky arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggh
Seasonal beers from Aldi
Scarves noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Crap running/cycling gear from Asda/Tesco
Car sponges
Driving gloves PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MAKE IT STOP
Z-list celebrity shower gel

PP – maybe they’re trying to tell you something

Do you have the complexion of a French Ski Instructor, and look a bit like this….

PP – maybe they’re trying to tell you something

Yep. I’ve got a face like Sid James’ nutsack. 😀

acidtest -, ask for Lynx England. It smells of cigarettes and quiet despair

I don’t like any of the Lynx range, it’s all just too chemical for my liking.

Anything from the end of aisle display in a supermarket

A power kite. I’ve got this daft old uncle who thinks I’m interested in outdoorsy nonsense, when all I want to do is play computer games and read comics. I wish he’d just give it to a kid in Africa or something.

I was a chef, for a year, 20 years ago, yet every xmas for some reason my family buy my cook books, i have a collection of about 30, and that’s despite me giving away a load.

Plus i remarked about cheese once, so i’ve had a cheese board (from Asda) every year for the last 3 years, i do like cheese but not enough i’ve worn a piece of cheap slate through in 12 months!

Lego Technic (pretending to be Lego)

Aaargh. Please stop wasting your money on crap!!!

This. Just the thought that folks have wasted money on something that will get stuffed into a cupboard and forgotten 🙁

Another 12 months subscription of Horse and Hound Magazine.

I keep telling them ” The dog ran away and I ate the horse”.

justinbieber – Member
A power kite. I’ve got this daft old uncle who thinks I’m interested in outdoorsy nonsense, when all I want to do is play computer games and read comics. I wish he’d just give it to a kid in Africa or something.

😀

My wife has just grumped off to bed reminding me that we have to sort out presents fro everyone this weekend (we live overseas so have to do most of it online).

woody2000 – Member
Any gift at all will make me grumpy – I’ve been asking people for years not to buy me anything for birthday/Xmas etc and to make a donation to charity instead, please. Do they listen? Do they ****! “Ooh, you must want something?” – NO I BLOODY DON’T!!!!!

And breathe….
Are you me? Very much this. We’re fortunate that we are very comfortable in life and generally buy ourselves ‘stuff’ when we want it. I don’t want people to guess what I want and just buy me any old crap out of some sense of obligation. It’s a waste of their money and usually ignores what I actually want e.g. a donation to charity if you must do something, which seems to ignore the spirit of Christmas.

Gift packs. Gift packs of anything. Just get me the contents if you have to, it’ll be half the price and use less packaging.

blinkin nora!!

Grumpy about receiving gifts!?!?!

The Meldrew factor in this place is unbelievable sometimes

“Funny” books about rugby. My lovely mum’s speciality. Where she finds a different one every year from, I just don’t know.

Aren’t they all just a reference to odd shaped balls dezzy?

Money in envelopes, whilst infinitely better than some of the crap already mentioned, i just find it lazy & impersonal. do you not know me well enough or can you not be bothered to buy something i might like? so much cool shit out there!!

If someone gives the dog another bloody squeeky cracker…

Christmas spirit in our house…. from sort of from mid november-ish, all the packages that regularly arrive from CRC, Wiggle, Amazon or ASOS etc are generally intercepted , whisked away, wrapped up and hidden till xmas day. you get very few surprises but at least no disappointments… except that time i ordered a puppy…..

mahalo – Member
Money in envelopes, whilst infinitely better than some of the crap already mentioned, i just find it lazy & impersonal. do you not know me well enough or can you not be bothered to buy something i might like? so much cool shit out there!!

That’s the thing though, how do random relations know what you want? For instance, right now I am, at any given point in time, planning an Ewok village complex of treehouses in my head, ready to build with my son this summer. So things I want include a couple of 250+-by-something beams, some flooring joists, decking timber, joist hangers, various specific types of coach screws, etc. etc. But none of that is anything that someone could buy me, as it needs to be exactly what I need (which will change daily as it will be an ad hoc build), not something that someone has guessed that I might want.

Presents bought out of obligation are a waste of everyone’s time, and resources in general.

Aren’t they all just a reference to odd shaped balls dezzy?

Ah, if only!

My BIL moved into* his own place around a year ago. He still doesn’t have much in the way of cooking equipment. Mainly because he’s in the “won’t cook” camp.

So we’ve bought him some saucepans and utensils. Will he want them? Unlikely. Will he need them – yes, one day his mother will be too old to wait on him.

What he’ll really want are comic books and computer games….

*Sort of. It’s rather complicated, but I think the transition away from parental care to living by himself is hampered by a family who won’t push him a little harder to take on basic responsibilities.

What he’ll really want are comic books and computer games….

Power Kite it is then!

I have expensive tastes. I would never expect anyone to buy me anything whatsoever, let alone the sort of pricey stuff I aspire to owning. I loathe feeling indebted to people, which is how receiving gifts makes me feel.

So, pretty much any present will make me grumpy unless it’s vouchers to spend at Piccadilly Records, something we can do as a family or something I can do with my daughter (for my 40th birthday this year she gave me the Lego Mini Cooper and we’ve been building it together (actually, I just help her build it)).

the other 6 dwarves

Its the thought that counts – so none.

(but hopefully no one will waste hard earned cash on the wrong thing!)

Another putting machine off the sister-in-law could be breaking point, had 3 so far in last 10 years and I do not play golf!

That much thought goes into it she obviously forgets 🙂

Oh i`m also nearly down to the bottom row of leather wallets in my wallet drawer!

Maybe we start an unwanted tat swapshop thread in January. 🙂