• This topic has 91 replies, 72 voices, and was last updated 7 years ago by ski.
Viewing 40 posts - 41 through 80 (of 92 total)
  • What do you do to annoy people?
  • rickmeister
    Full Member

    Force feeding someone pudding

    teethgrinder
    Full Member

    Obviously something, else she wouldn’t be in a foul mood all (long) weekend.

    To the extent that I would have it as my Groundhog Weekend, just to think of new ways to dispose of the body.

    captainsasquatch
    Free Member

    Have a tattoo or two.

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

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    onandon
    Free Member

    When people abandon their shopping trolley in the middle on an isle, i like to give it a punt with my trolley ( if I’m using one ) or walk it up and away from them ( freaks them out when they’ve left their bag in it )

    If shopping. Move your **** trolley you useless ****.

    bongohoohaa
    Free Member

    Unloading the shopping onto the conveyor belt rather than meekly waiting for the owner of the abandoned trolley/basket to return to the queue – use of the phrase you snooze you loose increases the annoyance factor somewhat too

    I also misspell lose on purpose to annoy pedants.

    ads678
    Full Member

    I’ve always enjoyed forgetting to use the plastic divider at the supermarket check out that seperates your shopping from those ahead and behind. Combining this with pushing my produce up the belt, really close to the bloke in front makes my day

    You do realise that these are to assist the checkout worker, so you are actually just purposely making their job harder just for the sake of it. Which is nice of you……… 🙄

    stumpy01
    Full Member

    Leaving cupboards/drawers open – normally temporarily, but occasionally I forget to close them.
    It drive my Wife mad, but I see no problem…and her insistence on shutting doors/drawers drives me mad (so we’re probably even).e.g:

    To unlock the front door, I’ll go to the drawer we keep the keys in (I’m not telling you which one), open it, take the keys out & walk over to the door. The drawer might as well stay open for the <10 seconds it will take me to unlock the door & return the key to the drawer. But, if my Wife comes in during the unlocking procedure, she will close the drawer. WHY?! DID YOU DO THAT…..!? I now have to open it again to put the key back, just to close it again. GAH!

    I also stare at her boobs…..

    ahwiles
    Free Member

    i obey speed limits, sometimes going a bit slower if conditions suggest*.

    it’s great fun!

    (*fr’example: the local high street is a 30 limit, i honestly reckon that’s a silly speed for a road with blind spots, side streets, kids, shoppers, bus stops, speed bumps, etc. etc.)

    jimjam
    Free Member

    sneakyg4
    I don’t eat meat, this seems to irritate meat eaters, but I also manage to irritate the more hardcore vegetarians as my reasons for this are nothing to do with animal rights; I do it for health reasons.

    There’s nothing annoying about people not eating meat. It’s the utterly predictable and seemingly interminable bleating about it that’s annoying. See above 🙂

    blurty
    Full Member

    When people abandon their shopping trolley in the middle on an isle, i like to give it a punt with my trolley ( if I’m using one ) or walk it up and away from them ( freaks them out when they’ve left their bag in it )

    When I was a student, living in a scabby part of Nottingham, I got in the habit of stealing other peoples shopping trollies in supermarkets. I’d have a quick look, to see if it had roughly the right amount & sort of stuff I wanted, and then just walk off with it to the check-outs.

    Oh what a whacky wee lad I was

    davidtaylforth
    Free Member

    speak the truth on here……

    sneakyg4
    Full Member

    There’s nothing annoying about people not eating meat. It’s the utterly predictable and seemingly interminable bleating about it that’s annoying. See above

    Aye I will take that on the chin.

    Of course the other side of it is people bleating on about bacon. 🙂

    Gunz
    Free Member

    You do realise that these are to assist the checkout worker, so you are actually just purposely making their job harder just for the sake of it. Which is nice of you………

    Yes I do also realise this.

    wilburt
    Free Member

    None specifically to annoy people but it seems to happen anyway.

    Ride a bike on the road.
    Park on the road not the pavement.
    Stick to or below the speed limit.
    Breathe (“your doing that breathing thing” my wife)
    Talk too much (my kids)
    Talk too little ( friends)
    Ask direct questions ( chancers)

    mattsccm
    Free Member

    Drive according to the highway code.

    captainsasquatch
    Free Member

    I’ll walk across people, stop suddenly, reach across them in shops, talk across them, bump into them in busy pubs etc, apologise and then continue the act that necessitated the apology thus rendering it useless. Guaranteed piss boiler.

    PimpmasterJazz
    Free Member

    When I was a student, living in a scabby part of Nottingham, I got in the habit of stealing other peoples shopping trollies in supermarkets. I’d have a quick look, to see if it had roughly the right amount & sort of stuff I wanted, and then just walk off with it to the check-outs.

    😆

    This has tickled me.

    perchypanther
    Free Member

    I ride a bike which I purchased in Halfords.

    It has mudguards…..and reflectors.

    [url=https://flic.kr/p/GpCAN1]Untitled[/url] by Perchy Panther, on Flickr

    Beagleboy
    Full Member

    I purposefully swap the knives and spoons around in the cutlery drawer, then step back and watch the madness take over Mrs Beagleboy. Such an innocent little thing, but it completely sends her over the edge. 😈

    cheers_drive
    Full Member

    lunge – Member
    Sit in the aisle seat on trains, even if the window seat is empty. I won’t put my bag on the empty seat as I’m not a moron but when you have legs as long as mine the aisle is the only option. This apparently annoys people as they have to ask me to move.

    I always do this for the same reason

    DezB
    Free Member

    Ride my bike to work. Seems to really get to some bastards. Good.

    bikebouy
    Free Member

    I don’t generally attempt to annoy or enjoy annoying people. However, when I have a tailgater, it’s surprising how slowly I can drive whilst maintaining forward motion.

    This.

    CountZero
    Full Member

    What do you do to annoy people?

    Exist.

    esselgruntfuttock
    Free Member

    A lot of examples on this thread aren’t really about deliberately annoying people to be fair. I think anyone who deliberately tries to annoy people for no other reason than to get a reaction is either the end of a very large bell or suffering from some kind of attention deficit problem.
    ‘Tit for Tat’ is acceptable on occasion though.

    thepurist
    Full Member

    On trains I’d sit in the middle seat of 3 (not aisle, not window) then make eye contact with everyone who got on. Always amazing how long it took the other 2 seats to fill up.

    beefheart
    Free Member

    Discover my joy anytime anywhere.

    TheDTs
    Free Member

    A bit like slowing down with tailgaters, only in queues.
    People get right up behind you in queues, right in your personal space sometimes touching..
    I just leave a larger space in front of me, and let it grow.
    It surprises them when you kind of look like your going to take a step forward by say picking up your bag and either not move or move back slightly, into them.
    I find it often happens in the co-op and especially on Easyjet flight queues.

    You can almost sense the frustration building, why! it’s a queue your turn will come…

    rosscore
    Free Member

    Voting, it always annoys somebody I didn’t vote for.

    That and posting bollox on the internet.

    funkmasterp
    Full Member

    Not inching forward when queuing in traffic seems to anger some drivers. I always wait until there’s a big enough gap that moving forward is actually worthwhile. Also love driving really slowly when somebody is tailgating. I’ll occasionally even wave at them in the rearview or suddenly brake to test them.

    Also love winding up the missus by pretending I’m dead. It sends her in to a rage, but is worth it. It’s a long con, one day I won’t be pretending 😀

    timber
    Full Member

    Putting stuff away at work seems to annoy some people. I tend to put it away where I think is right.
    For a member of staff that frequently abandoned their work vehicle in the middle of the yard, on one occasion it was tidied away to 1/2 mile up the track. Also took them ages to find the keys as I put them back on the board.

    toxicsoks
    Free Member

    Asking why roadies are such miserable sods. 😈

    Bregante
    Full Member

    arresting people tends to get their back up a bit. Sadly I don’t get much opportunity these days.

    jamesoz
    Full Member

    I take a really immature pleasure from getting alongside another driver whose on the phone, holding the stupidly loud horn on that my works van has and matching their speed. Really good fun on the way into London on the M4/A4. Most effective with soft top cars.

    oink1
    Free Member

    At the Little Stoke roundabout in Bristol, heading towards Bradley Stoke Its 2 lanes as you come off the roundabout. Theres a pedestrian crossing about 2 car lengths in. Often when I’m waiting at the lights some idiot will drive up by the side of me, knowing full well theres only about 20 meters left of the lane that they are in. If they try and boot it to overtake me, I will do the same 😈 I made some idiot in a 335 regret this not so long ago 😆

    crikey
    Free Member

    I like winding up STWers, they’re such whinymiddleclasscockbags.

    MrSmith
    Free Member

    Not move forward in queues but leave a bit of a gap in front, seems to annoy the hell out of people behind even though moving closer into my personal space isn’t going to get you served quicker. They get even more annoyed when I suddenly turn round with my elbow stuck out to look at something towards the back of the shop.
    I take great delight in this behaviour.

    milky1980
    Free Member

    The obeying the speed limit thing really winds people up. Just today I was going down the A48(M) through the 50mph section. Traffic in the left lane doing 45, solid nose-to-tail as there’s been a speed camera van there all BH weekend so everyone’s behaving. I’m pottering along at 50 in the right hand lane with an Audi Q-something about a foot off my rear – had the bike rack on the back too. Pretty sure I saw his windscreen turn red as he exploded in rage 😆

    Shopping games: putting inappropriate stuff in trolleys. Think along the lines of female student – incontinence pants, old granny – violent computer game etc.

    Oh and top of the list is riding my bike according to my boss 😕

    BigButSlimmerBloke
    Free Member

    Not organising it advance, just turning up at the airport and telling the armed cop you have a firearm, he takes you to the front of the checkin then holds it for you while you fanny about with the paperwork. Then, once you’re at the gate, just stare at anyone who looks like they might want to sit next to you. Especially easyjetting back from Belfast.
    Almost worth taking a gun and adding the £15 special handling charge

    MrWoppit
    Free Member

    Clipping the heels of those pushy commuters who push past me at Victoria or Waterloo whilst I’m trundling the Brompton through.

    Oh, and contributing to the Tragic Jeremy thread… 😀

    P-Jay
    Free Member

    Beagleboy – Member

    I purposefully swap the knives and spoons around in the cutlery drawer, then step back and watch the madness take over Mrs Beagleboy. Such an innocent little thing, but it completely sends her over the edge.

    Me too!

    Mrs Jay is a creature of habit, and a slave to to her habits, in my opinion (and this opinion is limited to just me) she makes poor decisions, or rather doesn’t make any at all – when presents with something, she will invariably do the exact same thing she always did even if it’s completely illogical.

    She is also incredibly quick to form them, do something twice, and that’s it – set for life.

    So I mix up the spoons… which is annoying to her, and other things which are even more annoying to break habits, I do realise that’s the failing is mine, not hers, there’s not much wrong with doing the same thing over and over – a pre defined answer to a question you’ve answered many times before is called ‘experience’ even if you do it without considering the details or new information gained since last time… Grrrr (It’s Me, not Her).

    I’m also incredibly impatient, I tried one of those on-line ADD tests once, I melted the test I think. I’m usually okay at home, but sometimes ‘work head’ doesn’t turn off on the way home, or I get ambushed with by one of the kids as I’m coming through the door of an evening and it stick with me – I’m not easy to live with when I think everyone I love most it just a barrier to me ha ha.

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