Ok is it acceptable to text an ex partner a ‘happy vals day’ msg when you are in another relationship?

Yay or nay?

Unwise.

Of course not, you nutter.

…also, buy a better calendar.

I dunno – I took a call from an ex (when in another relationship) at midnight of the millennium. We’re now married with two kids…

Do it.

Did your partner ?

as greatape and the go-betweens put it

that’s just a little unkind and a little unwise

You been taking a sneaky peek at your partner’s phone eh?

Not normal behaviour for someone who has moved on, so wrong in my opinion.

Depends who Val is

stox and psling have it I reckon, 😉
It’ll all end in tears…

Nowt wrong with having an insurance policy…

The relationship ended for a reason. Have things changed? If so, go ahead. If not, go ahead if you feel you must (and you are asking random strangers on a mountain biking website) but don’t come crying to me…

How would you feel if your new partner did the same…?

Did you or did your missus or did someone text you?- this will change the response….

@Ambrose/Lodders

I think khani is right when he says stox/psling have it right.

i.e…it’s not the OP who has texted anyone, but his missus.

Allegedly etc etc.

NO – the only reason is to indicate feelings and, I assume, wishing to be still in a relationship with them/still be in love with them.

I cannot see an other reason to wish anyone Happy valentines day though it would be amusing to see an GF try – I doubt I would even listen tbh.

Do it, you might get your end away.

I got a text from an ex on Valentine’s Day that said “Have a great day gorgeous”. We are friends and I took it as a bit of light hearted silliness. But we did split up 12 years ago and there is definitely no chemistry there these days.

Oh and we are both single so there in no-one to get upset.

Hi all

Thanks for the responses. Stox n psling n khani are right. Was her n not me…. apparantly ‘its nothing to worry about’ n i shouldnt be jealous n forget it…

She did say if i had done it she wouldnt have liked it at all. Nowt like some double standards eh?

Cheers

Does your patio need redoing?

Hmmmm no, definitely not. And there is a serious issue of she wouldn’t of liked it if you did it, but it’s ok for her to do it!

Double standards indeed mate.

Was her n not me…. apparantly ‘its nothing to worry about’ n i shouldnt be jealous n forget it…

Well….she would say that.

She sent the text, or she received the text?

I’d not be worried by the latter, but the former is a little odd…

I get the impression she sent the text.

If this is a fairly new relationship, just get out of there.

How exactly did you find out about it?

If she sent the text then she’s bang out of order. If she received the ex then there’s not much she can do about it. If it’s the latter and she told you about it, there’s less to worry about.

apparantly ‘its nothing to worry about’ n i shouldnt be jealous n forget it…

She says whilst insisting that she would be cross if you did it

It is dificult to think of anyone who would not be put out by this

I don’t think I’d be overly concerned so long as it’s very definitely an ‘over’ relationship. I’m friends with most of my exes and wouldn’t assume that they were carrying a torch for me still if I got a “happy Valentine’s day” message any more than a “happy birthday” message, so similarly I wouldn’t immediately read anything into it if my OH got / sent one. On the other hand, if the message was “thinking about you, fancy a shag?” then that’s an entirely different situation.

A bigger concern for me would be the double standards issue. She expects you to trust her, but she doesn’t trust you? Why would she not want you to do what she’s doing, is she up to something inappropriate?

well i gotta say that the girl i lived with in eastern europe 20 odd years ago pm’d me on facebook on valentines day and invited me and the family.. now married two kids to visit ( she married kids) and assured me the death threats she made when we split up were now rescinded..

is the current mrs tts concerned.. only about what to wear for Budapest in May.

Why keep in touch with an ex? Usually a bad idea all round IME.

I’d also not be happy with someone sneaking a look at the messages in my phone. I think that reflects on the level of trust in a relationship. It’s certainly killed things off for n in the past. It almost doesn’t matter if you’re cheating or not when the person you’re with, constantly thinks you are cheating.

number18 – Member
Why keep in touch with an ex? Usually a bad idea all round IME.

Well, that all depends; I’ve stayed on good terms with most of mine, was invited and went to the weddings of two, another, my first, as it happens, has just moved, with her family, to a house just down the road, and I’m going out for a drink with another for her birthday on Monday in Bath.
Just because some people’s relationships end in bitterness and anger, doesn’t mean everyone’s does.
One of my exes phoned me at 10pm one night, after a boozy challenge from a friend, she’d said that I was someone she could trust to be there for her, should anything bad happen, at any time, and they called her on it.
There ensued a really funny conversation with three really pissed females on one end and me on the other, for the best part of an hour!

Countzero= playah!! 🙂

There ensued a really funny conversation with three really pissed females on one my end… ….for the best part of an hour!

8)

It almost doesn’t matter if you’re cheating or not when the person you’re with, constantly thinks you are cheating.

It does though, doesn’t it…

Feel free to text my ex if you like. Just make sure you call her a controlling, cheating, 2 faced bitch, when you do. Cheers

No, but perfectly acceptable for your new partner to send a gloating text about how amazing you are

It does though, doesn’t it…

Not really in terms of how likely the relationship is to succeed, as I’ve recently found out…

wouldn’t assume that they were carrying a torch for me still if I got a “happy Valentine’s day” message any more than a “happy birthday” message

Well one is a day when you say happy birthday and one is a day when you say I love you to the person you love

They are not the same, they are not even close