Out with the offspring today in the local park – we flew a kite in the sun, went down to the river, skimmed some stones, and she wanted to explore a bit further along the riverside path – it’s a path that doesn’t really go anywhere, you can get so far and then no further, but it’s a nice stroll.

Near the end, was hailed by a fisherman* on the opposite bank, who started yelling about how we could go no further (I yelled back that I knew that), that I was being irresponsible with a child, and that I shouldn’t be walking along there in trainers**, and if we didn’t turn back right away he’d wade over and stop us.

By this point herself had reached the end anyway, and was getting a bit worried about the shouty man, so we turned back.

So, my question – what’s the best way to tell someone to shove it where the sun doesn’t shine, without the offspring picking up lots of interesting phrases to repeat at nursery?

*he was wearing waders and was with two friends, but this is Glasgow, they may well have been there to drink
**they were approach shoes 😉

Edited and fixed – he wanted us to turn back.

Misunderstanding between two, equally well-intentioned folk.

Or:

he was wearing waders and was with two friends, but this is Glasgow, they may well have been there to drink

😀

Drinking waders.

Duct tape and zip ties.

Just shout back that your little girl has a rare inoperable brain tumour and has days to live and just wanted one last walk by the river… I’m sure he would have struggled with a comeback

Ha, I like that – though she’d definitely start repeating that at nursery.

I just say thanks for your help and nod politely, but usually by then my three year old girl has already climbed a fence / ridden the neighbours pit bull / driven my car. They think it proves their point, where as I know I win ‘cos my daughter is perfect and they are being a bit of a knob. Everyone’s happy.

EDIT – not that I get *that* much unsolicited advice, unless uh count my wife’s comments.

Just say not to worry you’ve got another one at home if you lose this one. Or don’t worry she’s not mine I just found her wandering about. That should calm him down.

Not really sure where he was coming from. We’re you on private property or land managed by an angling club? Why would he come over and stop you because you were on a dead end path and he didn’t like your shoes?!

Say she’s not yours, just one you found in Portugal a few years ago?

We’re you on private property or land managed by an angling club?

Nope, it’s a public park.