kukeslala »Have you considered that they just don't care? With over 6 billion people on the planet I've not a hope of meeting everyone just in case I make a connection with them and the fact that I might share a few extra genes with a handful of them makes it no more likely.
I have thought through reasons for why they have not made contact with me (there are many not just the one I mentioned above).
Unknown sibling, would you want them to contact you?
I think i would want to know my sibling as they were likely just victims of circumstances.
Cant see what real harm can come from it tbh
Have you considered that they just don't care?
I think he has, that was implied in the first post.
I think you have accounted for yourself well OP, I would give it a chance, just take baby steps..
yes, absolutely - this is an entirely possible scenario in my own situation
Although, I add a small note of caution, just as something to consider..
I met up with friends of my father a couple of years back, which turned out to be a lot more emotionally involving than I thought it would be.. I think I had expected very little, perhaps maybe even nothing at all and was offered a great deal more than that, and so I found the whole experience although almost entirely positive, to be a bit overwhelming..
totally recommended though..
It turned into quite a journey of discovery, not only into the past but also within myself..
When I was around 30 my Mum told me my Dad had been married before, but I wasn't to tell him I had been told, as for his own reasons he didn't want me to know - I think it had really worried my Mum that I didn't know. Bit of a shock but thought that was the end of the 'family secrets'.
Roll on a few years just after my Dad died and my Mum summoned me home as she something to tell me that she couldn't over the phone. Apparently my Dad had fathered a daughter when he was around 20, did his service with the RAF, and got back to find his wife had met someone else. My Dad was 48 when I was born, and he had never mentioned either being married or having a daughter (who would be 30ish years older than me). My Mum felt she had to tell me as a number of relatives knew and she feared them telling me if she died.
For a while it was quite upsetting as it changing my views of my Dad as he was the sort of guy who went out of his way to help people and was particularly close to his niece and her 4 daughters, and shocked me that he had no relationship with his own flesh and blood. As a result I have never had any inclination to find her as it may open a can of worms, despite most friends saying they think I should.
On a related topic I was made redundant from the sperm bank many years ago as I had reached the "target" of successful conceptions. As I don't have any children of my own, I often think about how I would feel if one of my biological kids wanted to contact me, and the older I have become the more I would be open to this happening. I recall a TV programme of the distress a teenage girl went through trying to find and contact her biological father.
Kimbers> no, just doing some crouching tiger crap in his garden with a collection of knives..
scotroutes Have you considered that they just don't care?
Um yes, is this a trick question? The post you quote of mine, is a conversation between me and another poster discussing exactly that...
Thanks to everyone again for giving their feedback and situations.
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