I am about to run out of Udderly Smooth which I have used happily for a while. Before ordering some more I have a feeling I have read somewhere about people using other, ahem, udder balms, or udder liniments.

Just wondering if I go into my local dairy farm supply shop and ask for a tub of udder lube will I have some strange looks, and more importantly can I use the stuff on my bum?

Any good?

Its waterproof I suppose.

And if I was hungry on a ride I could lick my chamois?

Most serious cyclists in South Africa use "speen salf"- afrikaans, translates as "teat lotion" bought from any farmers supply depot. Never used it myself but they swear by it.

The old fashion way

It'll probably be cooked enough after 4 hrs