I’m becoming increasingly frustrated at work (I’m a designer, no quallifications, just learnt on the job over the years). I’m talking, so fed up that its making it hard to do anything after work because I’m so bummed out. Not good right? 🙁

The job market sucks though (been applying for the scarce jobs that come up for over a year), and it’s an easy but stressful job, that I’m very good at, and that pays very well. Problem is I’m making it a hard job because I can’t be bothered with it (deadlines missed, mistakes being made etc..), and I don;t feel I’m on top of my game anymore.

Am I being naive in thinking that I’m going to spend half my life at work, so should enjoy it? or should I accept that working is doing something you hate for 8 hours a day to get some cash in? I also know other people that are worse off than me and would love a job like mine, so I’d feel quite guilty about packing it in…

I have no debts, and could live on half my wage. I’ve been thinking of going self employed and working part time, but I’ve tried it before and I spent more time working/stressing than ever!

I can’t decide what to do in all honesty… But I’m fed up of being tired and stressed out!

Anyone been through similar and have any advice?

I can’t offer any advice but if it’s any consolation I feel exactly the same.

Would your work consider a sabbatical? It sounds like a fairly cushdy job to be fair and a year off might just set you up right again. It would be a shame to chuck it in only to have to work 8 hours a day in a job you still hate earning half what you earn now.

Can you not get signed off with stress for a couple of months, take a nice long holiday, and then come back and give the job another shot?

If you still feel the same after a good long de-stress then obviously you need to look for something else, but you might just find the break will put things in perspective.

I’m firmly on the ‘life’s too short’ camp. You should be able to do a job you enjoy especially if you don’t have significant financial ties. I’d say apply for jobs that aren’t advertised, ie find companies you would like to work for then send a speculative cv, or give freelance another go but focus on managing your workload better.

Most people will have gone through what you are, life sucks. You can either suck it up like 90% of others do or move on and do something about it.
I did so I quit my job and went self employed. 10 yrs later im still in business and currently in bed drinking coffee typing this.

I took a 20% pay cut a couple of years ago to move to a 4day/30hr week.

Best thing I ever did. Got used to the drop in disposable income pretty quickly. It really shifts the balance from work to not work. Think how much better a bank holiday weekend is, now do that every weekend.

What is it that’s actually frustrating you? Are you sure the work is really the problem? What are the people like?

I did a job I hated. Dull but well paid. I decided life was too short, and I had a lot of years working in front of me. So I jacked it all in, and went to uni to be, ironically … a designer.

I love it! Most of the time. But if you’re not feeling challenged, is there any way you could add something to your job. I used to spend all my time designing purely for print. I could do it in my sleep if I wanted.

So I taught myself a new skill. I learnt to use Flash, and have now carved a little niche for myself doing animations for big screens at exhibitions and in retail. So instead of it being easy, I find I have to really think about things, as it takes a lot more effort than what I was doing before. And I get to do more illustration work, which I love.

So you don’t have to go veering off on a tangent. Just diversify a bit and try something new

drive a black cab a couple of days a week, money is crap but im there for my kids whenever they need me. couldnt give a toss about being rich, successful, having a new car or all the other material nonsense.

Wife is starting to mither me about getting a proper job but at the moment my quality of life has never been better.

going and sitting in an office everyday, regardless of the financial benefits, is my idea of hell, which is a little inconvenient as my Masters is in town planning, a job which would require me to sit in an office most of the time. Bollox to that!

How about flexing the hours or working from home one day. I think its a legal requirement now for your employer to help with this. May break the routine a little or get in a bit of headspace / biking ?

If you have no real ties take some time out, a year or so, go traveling/wwoofing. Consider registering with helpx, (I got offered work out in Canada, but it’s worldwide, you choose who to apply with) – you buy the ticket out there, then work four hours a day in return for food and accommodation. Get to travel the world and meet different, interesting, resourceful (often gung-ho) people is a boost beyond words, you’ll learn more about your strengths, weaknesses, desires etc in one year than you would in decades of the same job. Can’t recommend highly enough. It should be compulsory like National Service, else decades can pass as one year, and life can be short…

You sound like l feel at the moment in my current job. Been in this job for three years, im the only designer here, fed up of the work, very boring, made far worse by the fact that there is no sense of enjoyment in the workplace. Its well paid, lm close to home, lots of time after work etc… But l cant take anymore of it.

Luckily l managed to get myself a job with a big manufacturing company last week, and just in the process of sorting salary etc. The way l see it lm actually taking a hit on time and a little bit on money, but its worth it for my sanity, and my homelife – wife, kid etc.

If you’ve no dependants I’d jack it in (or sabbatical), and maybe look around for something else in the meantime. Life’s too short not to enjoy 9 hours a day

I’m sick of it too. I reckon a great deal of what’s wrong with work these days actually have very little to do with “doing the job”. It’s all the background dross that we all have to put up with days. Corporate bullshit, Personal Development Plans, etc.

Thanks all. Feel a bit better knowing others feel the same.

A year out sounds cool, but my wife may disagree! No kids, and we don’t want any, so only the mortgage to think about really.

working less seems like a good idea, but not sure that would fly with the company I work for (I’m the only designer too, and we have lots of work on but not making enough for more staff).

See if your company will pay for some ‘Life Coaching’. Its all stuff your mates could probably tell you, but it may help. If not I’d consider putting your hand in your pocket and paying for it yourself.

FWIW I took voluntary redundancy and walked in to a similar job with even more depressing politics and culture than the last place but I’m much happier in my work.

It sounds to me like you actually have quite a lot of control over your work, you’re just letting things slip due to a lack of motivation.

I have no debts, and could live on half my wage. I’ve been thinking of going self employed and working part time, but I’ve tried it before and I spent more time working/stressing than ever!

In which case, life is too short to be pissed off working. Change job and find something else / go self employed.

It also sounds like you’re in quite a strong negotiating position to work less hours / get an assistant if you’re the only designer and they have lots of work.

Speak to your manager, tell them about your situation and see what they can do.

Sounds like you are on the slippery slope to depression.

If you are not eating well, that needs to change.

You need to do something about it and that’s the choice to make.

Any of the following:

Force your self to do something new after work that is easily accessible, martial arts, pilates etc.

Work less hours, ride more.

Make a plan to start up on your own that will give you more freedom, not less.

Take a break.

Leave work and have a long bike riding holiday.

Good luck.

Hmm, mortgage. Even a month out doing something else can be a lifesaver/perspective bringer. Also take up swimming. Swim! It is as good for the mind as the body.

Sounds like you are on the slippery slope to depression.

This was my first thought TBH.

I’m self employed and it’s not always easy. In my line of work, it’s either really busy or quiet.

Think long term if you are establishing a business as you can’t just up and leave for a year or move areas if you have a good customer base locally.

If you are just freelancing or contracting that shouldn’t be an issue but I often think about moving or taking a year out but I’d have no customers to come back to and I’d have to start all over again getting established.

Sounds like you are on the slippery slope to depression.

This was my first thought TBH.

Been there before, swore it would never happen again…

Should also point out, 5 years ago I was 7stone lighter and doing a few fun XC races and 200+ mile weeks. I’m now barly able to do 20miles on the MTB, 2 times a week. 😯

Reading above and thinking about it, I have pleanty of options… I just need to pick one and get on with it instead of worrying. As long as it’s a change, it should do me good.

Being self employed is hard work, not a part time, spend the day in your PJ’s jolly.

It’s much harder to leave work at the office as you are always thinking about maximising opportunities as you don’t know where things will go in the future.

You also can’t really turn work down if you want to keep your clients so some times it just gets silly. You’ve either got too much work and no time for fun or you’ve got no work and your bricking it and trying to bring some in!

I love being self employed but it’s not the route to a stress free life by any means.

Your job sounds cushy. Don’t shaft your employer by signing yourself off as someone suggested. Save up some holidays or ask for unpaid leave and bugger off for a month. Get a fresh perspective.

Good luck with it!

Being self employed is hard work, not a part time, spend the day in your PJ’s jolly.

It’s much harder to leave work at the office as you are always thinking about maximising opportunities as you don’t know where things will go in the future.

You also can’t really turn work down if you want to keep your clients so some times it just gets silly. You’ve either got too much work and no time for fun or you’ve got no work and your bricking it and trying to bring some in!

I love being self employed but it’s not the route to a stress free life by any means.

Your job sounds cushy. Don’t shaft your employer by signing yourself off as someone suggested. Save up some holidays or ask for unpaid leave and bugger off for a month. Get a fresh perspective.

Good luck with it!

This is exactly why I was working more, and more stressed the first time i was self employed.

I don’t mind stress and hard work as long as it’s rewarding and seems worth while.

If you can manage on half your wage why not get a job doing something completely different, and do some design work in your spare time. You could cherry pick your good clients.

Should also point out, 5 years ago I was 7stone lighter

Been there too, half way back. As I said, get swimming! I found a local pool membership for 16 quid a month, better investment even than a large mobile phone contract – at first couldn’t really swim very well plus was quite seriously overweight, so enjoyed the feeling of weightlessness and stuck at it. Forget freestyle, I was a paddling frog with a barely legible breastroke, but it was easier than jumping on the bike and feeling like a sack of spuds, which was totally demotivating. A year later I can nail a mile with a fairly competent front crawl in about 40 mins. I also feel more energised mentally, and more confident, using the bikes more, and get grumpy as hell if I miss a swim, turns out it also busts stress and depression (as does most aerobic physical exercise) – but there’s something about water that just sort of has a psychological cleansing effect.

I quit my (reasonably well paid, cushy) job 8 months ago and am loving my new life. Plan to work part-time, do a lot more riding, gardening, DIY, and helping out my aging parents (and their aging houses…). After 20 years of cubicle life, I’ve saved up enough that money isn’t really a limiting factor (which is not that hard for DINKY couple, if you think about it, though most of our friends seem rather surprised).

Obviously it depends on the personal situation, but life is too short to spend it doing stuff that you don’t enjoy.

Reading above and thinking about it, I have pleanty of options… I just need to pick one and get on with it instead of worrying. As long as it’s a change, it should do me good.

Not trying to put you off, but as you seem prone to this, when you’re down is not always the best time to make big decisions.

I would recommend eating better and some exercise that is easily accessible first, give yourself something to look forward to after work. Some endorphins and nice food.
Try herbal supplements, St Johns Wort for example, I’m assuming you are not taking anti-depressants.

Make the big decisions when you are feeling a bit better balanced.

The only note of caution I’d give is – I know two people who’ve been in a similar boat, especially in the sense of having being in one job/role/employer for most or all of the career and feeling ill-equipped to leave – and when they’ve finally jumped ship they’d learned quite quickly that it wasn’t the job that that was getting them down / stressing them out. They were just down and stressed and blaming it on the job because that was where they were all day. They didn’t really have a way to see that the unhappiness was something they were taking into work with them, not something that was waiting for them when they got there. One of them is now quite ‘happily’ back doing the same job, just as stressed and glum, to be honest, but comfortable with the fact that the glum-ness comes from him rather than the work.

The trouble is – thats difficult distinction to make if you can’t step away in some way.

My own personal experience is I’m a poor fit for regular paid work and jacking it in a walking away was the best thing I ever did even though the job I was doing was one a lot of my sector colleagues would have crawled over broken glass to get. I had the same sensation of being paralysed outside of work and not being able to motivate myself to use or enjoy my time. Just working or waiting to work. I could make that decision to leave more easily than most because I’d been freelance for a long time before I’d ever tried regular employment so although I was taking a step into the unknown I knew that the unknown would contain something that was probably OK.

I’m perfectly happy having no guarantee of work, no business plan, no pension and no safety net. Ms Maccruiskeen is in the more perilous end of the same boat. Together our lives would be most other people’s idea of absolute hair-tearing hell but its what works for us.

I agree that life is too short to be stuck in a job that you hate. My only advice would be to make sure it is the job itself and not depression or something else.

Did you enjoy the job a while back, has anything changed recently?

I have seen a lot of people change career or even move country because they were unhappy only to land up in another country or career and still feeling unhappy but without the security of a decent income or family and friends that used to be close by.

I have seen a lot of people change career or even move country because they were unhappy only to land up in another country or career and still feeling unhappy

Certainly I’ve found Highland and Islands are full of people who’ve moved there to get away from it all – only to find out the ‘it all’ they were trying to get away from is them.

Agree with all above, which is why I have no idea what to do…

I did enjoy the job, although it is a bit repetitive and I never get to see the end result of all my hard work.

I don’t get on with my arse of a boss at work (he’s a lifelong road rider and past racer, so we get on well out of work though), but I’m not bothered by that. You have to deal with difficult people in any job.

Sometimes it is good to simplify your life and how you live. People can become trapped in a certain job because of a large mortgage, high end car payments, fancy holidays and a wife with expensive shoe habit etc. I have found that the more basic my life becomes, the happier I get. I don’t need to earn a huge salary to maintain my lifestyle. I do have a good salary, but I have no fear of losing my job because I could get by very happily on a much lower one. I don’t get stressed out at work because I know I don’t need to be there really. I don’t take on extra responsibilities because I don’t need to prove anything to anyone. Once you strip away all the things that don’t matter in your life, it is amazing how much time you free up to do the things you enjoy.

I need to bump off my mother and MIL so we can get the mortgage paid off. Anybody interested in the contract?

Sometimes it is good to simplify your life and how you live. People can become trapped in a certain job because of a large mortgage, high end car payments, fancy holidays and a wife with expensive shoe habit etc. I have found that the more basic my life becomes, the happier I get. I don’t need to earn a huge salary to maintain my lifestyle. I do have a good salary, but I have no fear of losing my job because I could get by very happily on a much lower one. I don’t get stressed out at work because I know I don’t need to be there really. I don’t take on extra responsibilities because I don’t need to prove anything to anyone. Once you strip away all the things that don’t matter in your life, it is amazing how much time you free up to do the things you enjoy.

You know, thats the best answer yet! Thanks.

I’ve spent the last 2 years getting rid of all my debt (3 motorbikes, my MTB, a big PC and a credit card + others), and I’m in your position now. The wife is a yorkshire lass and spends nothing on anything (plus she earns twice what I do and can buy her own shoes!). The mortgage and bills are easily manageable as we went no where near our lending limit when buying the house…

So I don’t need my particualr job (or it’s salary), and I’m old enough and wise enough to not volutnteer for everything under the sun to try and impress the boss, plus no one seems to mind that I’m doing less now but me. So why do I worry about it? Is it so bad if I’m not working my arse off and doing extra hours to be on top of my game like I was a few years ago? Guess not really… 🙂

Well done to all the STW Therapists. Your work is done here so now can you please sort out Tony Blair because he has issues.

There’s only one solution for Tony Blair…………………..

I’m hearing more and more people say they’re fed up of jobs they don’t enjoy, working with bosses who don’t care or provide any leadership and working for employers who feel no sense of employee needs…. and that self-employment looks a lot more attractive (in part because they think contractors are all millionaires!)

I’ve been contracting for the last 3 years and it’s been really useful to realise that the unhappiness with work was primarily my reaction to a crap situation that created the stress. As a contractor the work situation is often still crap but because I’m not an ’employee’ who has to do what ‘the boss’ says, I find it easier to deal with and don’t get so stressed. I still think i’m a long way from my perfect job but I’m far far happier than I used to be and it’s a very workable solution from my point of view

So, freelance might well work for you but remember you have to create your own income, crap bosses will still be crap people when they’re your clients, and any issues you have with your job will not go away without significant self-examination and a change in your own approach.

One of the joys of freelancing though, is that none ever asks you to put in for the collection for Derek from accounts, who retires on Friday. Or bends your ear about Cheryl, the slutty bitch!… who only got that bloody promotion in the first place because she’s shagging Barry, the Finance director. And he’s married with 2 kids. You should have seen them at that sales conference last year….. blah, blah, blah…

And you can’t put a price on that!!! 😉