I don’t mean plot holes, just glaring balls ups by the entire production

Mrs Chubstr (she doesn’t like that name) was watching Eastenders the other night, and so was I 😳 but it occured to me that the layout of the Vic and where the living room is in no way relates to where it should be.

When they look out the window, they’re facing the square, but the layout says the windows should be on the other side of the pub.

Ok, I was hoping to think of something a bit cooler than that, but you get the idea

Despite the amount of time that everyone spends in the pub in Eastenders and Coronation Street there are very few alcoholics.

The number of murderers is disproportionately high however.

Especially Charlie Slater. Whenever anyone gets in the back of his cab, they are never seen again.

I think he’s taking them up the allotments and eating them.

Why the top detectives have not been locked up as serial killers.
Quite how much spirits you can drink on tv and not end up being pissed

Historic things in historic films! 😀

If a film is set in Tudor times that nice Tudor mansion would be all shiny and new like a new build house. Not all worn and weathered with wobbly wood and creaky staircases.

And that castle wouldn’t have half of it missing!

Film posters where the names of the actors listed are in a different order to those pictured.

When they look out the window, they’re facing the square, but the layout says the windows should be on the other side of the pub.

A lot is just to be able to accommodate the practicalities of filming and to compose a pleasing image. Although you’re presenting a domestic scene theres a camera and track in the room and around 20 people standing behind it. The sets are shaped to represent a domestic scene but the actually have to work for the film crew.

This is more obvious in things like soaps because they have to film really fast. In a one off drama / movie you can spend more time removing various walls, filming reverse angles etc and portray a more accurate space but soaps are much faster moving, so you have to shape spaces more like a theatre set so that all the action plays one way and you can get two-way conversations in one take even if its on multiple cameras. In cinema you’d do take after take – close ups, wides, and each persons view point, moving the set, props and camera to compose each shot – it takes days.

Whats really fun is watching old episodes of Taggart where they don’t bother with any of that, no sets, just rock up in any room get the actors to play a game of sardines where they’re standing shoulder to shoulder taking to the backs of each others heads and get it all in one take so you can all get to the pub early.

That green VW Beetles were incredibly popular in San Fransico around the time Bullitt was being filmed.

People firing guns indoors…. and subsiquenty being able to hear anything anyone says to them for the next hour.

It taking a seemingly known amount of time for the police to trace a phone call – just longer than it takes a husky voiced bad man to taunt the police. They should just get an iPhone. My phone tells me the number, where they’re calling from and even takes a guess at who the caller might be if they’re not in my address book before I even answer

Why do holiday companies allow Jessica Fletcher (Murder she wrote) to stay at their hotels, cruise ship or resorts, its guaranteed that someone will end up dead.

Why does no one in Eastenders have a washing machine or a television.

and the one that really twists my melon…..

Why did Bungle run about in the scuddy bare all day and then put on pyjamas to go to bed??

Why did Bungle run about in the scuddy bare all day and then put on pyjamas to go to bed??

And why is it, despite being so spoken and eloquent, the moment he gets behind the controls of the Millennium Falcon he makes Sylvester Stalone sound like Brian Sewell.

People firing guns indoors…. and subsiquenty being able to hear anything anyone says to them for the next hour.

Why did Anakins pod racer have a shonky resin MTB brake lever? Were Lee Chi a well known manufacturer “A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away”…?

Why would anyone go to the Midsummer’s? the chances of returning are pretty slim.

People go to the pub, buy a pint, take 1 sip, chat for 2 minutes, then go home, leaving most of their drink on the bar.

Weasel – Member
Film posters where the names of the actors listed are in a different order to those pictured.

That’s because the biggest start wants their name first, but also to be in the middle of the picture. It makes perfect sense when you consider the average Hollywood ego.

Why don’t the baddies just shoot the goodies on the spot, right away, instead of tying them up with some woman who’s got a pair of nail clippers in her handbag, saying they’ll be back later to sort them out?

Not to mention the empty coffee cup problem.

Why does no one in Eastenders have a washing machine or a television.

Because:

A lot is just to be able to accommodate the practicalities of filming and to compose a pleasing image. Although you’re presenting a domestic scene theres a camera and track in the room and around 20 people standing behind it. The sets are shaped to represent a domestic scene but the actually have to work for the film crew.

They have got a washing machine and a TV: they’re on the fourth wall, which you never see.

maccruiskeen – Member
It taking a seemingly known amount of time for the police to trace a phone call – just longer than it takes a husky voiced bad man to taunt the police. They should just get an iPhone. My phone tells me the number, where they’re calling from and even takes a guess at who the caller might be if they’re not in my address book before I even answer

Wasn’t the origin of this connected to the police not wanting it to be obvious that they can trace calls immediately these days?

I gather that the layout of the hotel in the Shining gets some Internet folks very agitated, but as I’ve never seen the movie it doesn’t bother me.

I was very impressed with how far a couple of heroin addicts could run for in the opening scene of Trainspotting, and how far the John Menzies security guard chased them for. Also quite how the guy who ran his car into Renton managed to park up a lane that’s no longer than a car and filled with bins and junk remains a mystery to me.

They have got a washing machine and a TV : they’re on the fourth wall

Why do they go to the Laundrette and the pub all the time then?

Shows where they can’t afford any weapons, so the actors are forced to improvise 😉

[video]https://youtu.be/W2tLKjeOstg[/video]

Car tyres that squeal on gravel roads in car chases……GAH!!!

and this:

holst – Member

Not to mention the empty coffee cup problem.

just stick something in the bloody cup, so it doesn’t look empty. I don’t know how you can tell it’s empty but it moves differently, or something & once you notice you can’t ‘not notice’ it.

The whole script for Prometheus. Nothing in that film made any sense, virtually every single scene contained something that made me utter “huh?”. If any film credits Damon Lindelof as a scriptwriter then I go out of my way not to watch it, as it will be utter pants. I’ve no idea how he continues to find work in the film industry.

Oh and Captain Slog. He’s mentioned in every single episode of Star Trek, but you never see the guy. Who is he?

Why do holiday companies allow Jessica Fletcher (Murder she wrote) to stay at their hotels, cruise ship or resorts, its guaranteed that someone will end up dead.

She travels from town to town committing brutal murders, which she then pins on innocent locals.

Anything to do with IT. They have some software that matches fingerprints or faces and it has this lovely flashy front end that not only matches fingerprints, but it brings up an image of each one and shows the bits that don’t match before going to the next one, but faster than any human could process so it’s useless information. It would take double the time to write all that graphics display code as well as the actual matching code. Not only that but the search would take 100x longer to run with all that graphical shite going on. Imagine having knocked up a clever script to hack into the baddies’ systems, and then spending another week making a nice progress bar and graphical front end.. for what purpose exactly?

As ChrisL suggests, I think they purposely do this a) if neither Apple or Microsoft have paid them to show an actual real OS; b) so that no-one can get an inkling of how this stuff actually works by watching TV shows; and c) because in real life it’d be just a page of text which does not look flashy.

Everyone knows that, in order to hack in to a secure computer, you simply need to type “HACK COMPUTER” whilst drinking Diet Coke in yer Ma’s basement.

They have some software that matches fingerprints or faces and it has this lovely flashy front end that not only matches fingerprints, but it brings up an image of each one and shows the bits that don’t match before going to the next one,

And it makes that ‘computer processing’ bleepy noise while it does it. Same with bombs. You’ve hidden a bomb somewhere, taken great care to sneak it past security and make sure nobody know about your evil plot, but everytime the massive digital clock (?!) changes it goes “BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP”

And guns make that cocking noise every time they’re moved.

Any hand held gun with a 10,000 round magazine (except the minigun in Terminator 2, etc. for the pedants). Sudden changes in daylight / weather conditions.

I can accept a lot of it stuff as watching people tapping away before finding out 3hrsater your forgot a bracket or semi colon and you need to start again gets dull 🙂 if I was to do facial recognition software it would just shows lots of faces from the Internet as a screen saver

Oh and coffee cups.. yeah.. that’s just the tip of that iceberg. Once you start really looking, then tons of stuff is just bollocks. They are betting on you watching the actors who are delivering lines – so start by looking at the people who aren’t speaking.. or even the extras.. then look carefully around the rooms.. 🙂

No one ever seems to need a wee. also those cars that blow up when they roll downhill? I’m not getting in one of those

Why does nobody in East Enders settle down to watch East Enders?

Why does nobody in East Enders settle down to watch East Enders?

Because it’s crap.

Animal noise sound clips – always the same.

Horses, turkeys and eagles always have the same exact sound clip on whichever media, including many videogames.

Also, why is an eagle call necessary on any sweeping landscape shot?

She travels from town to town committing brutal murders, which she then pins on innocent locals.

I wonder, is Jessica Fletcher a character in the real writers books, being played out in real life, so in essence we’re watching a book. Or Is Jessica Fletcher a writer who gets involved in all these murders, theen writes about them?

I think she commits the murders, solves them, then writes the books to clean up…….what a bitch

Everyone knows that, in order to hack in to a secure computer, you simply need to type “HACK COMPUTER” whilst drinking Diet Coke in yer Ma’s basement.

No need. Password is ‘geoff’ (from 1:50)

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6C_HjWr3Nk[/video]

And it makes that ‘computer processing’ bleepy noise while it does it.

This goes back to the early days of teletypers. Also flashing lights – ENIAC (one of the first computers, built in 1946) that had rows of flashing lights as its output. So ever since then, we’ve had flashing lights.

Why do holiday companies allow Jessica Fletcher (Murder she wrote) to stay at their hotels, cruise ship or resorts, its guaranteed that someone will end up dead.

Anything to do with IT.

Double whammy here: One of the Spanish TV seems to be repeating “Murder, she wrote” at the moment, yesterday’s episode was a classic:

80’s virtual reality:

… and despite the limitations of 80’s computers, the output was pretty good:

Martial arts stuff – why do gangs always attack the “goodie” one at a time? They can’t all be that stupid? (If you want a specific example, apart from Bruce Lee, watch the distinctly average remake of Old Boy.)

The tall blond one on Strictly and her orange partner – why orange?