Split tire?

When your toothpaste runs out, cut the both ends off the tube, then cut 2 x sides & wash to leave you with rectangular 2 x tire boot to carry.

Get a wife whose life revolves around horses; you’ll never see her, nor have much of a joint social life – but whatever you could ever feasibly spend on bicycles will pale into insignificance next to what she’ll spend on them!

When you get to a trail centre lock a lock outside the shop before you ride.
Then you have no worries after your ride that some scummer is going to nick your precious when your ordering tea and cakes.

wonders why people often try to join/split chains with quick links under tension.. came across a guy in the woods one day with his bike upside down trying to rejoin a chain like this.. no wonder it was a struggle

just drop the chain off the chainring and have the chain nice and slack…

This stuff’s good for holding grips in place, yet still allows them to be easily removed.

Miffy, that margarine tip is fantastic! Our 15 month old was playing with the filthy (always oiled, never cleaned) chain on my commuter/trailer towing bike, just before riding into town, from the campervan. No serious cleaning kit so informed the wife that I needed margarine and quickly. Less than a minute later we both had amazingly, perfectly clean, softly moisturised hands.

Amazing!