Me – cut through a live cable with some snippers.

😯

Rolled a soft top sports car….

Pulled back unloading a dishwasher…ow….

Had a massive argument with my wife over nothing, and I don’t argue very often at all.

Changed my day shift to a night shift so I could.look after my son today and tomorrow. Hmm, up at 0630 today, finish work at 0700 tomorrow… bring on the caffeine!

My weekend started on Friday.

Went to the opticians and ended up spending £1300. 😯

Got some of the worst jet lag I’ve ever had after sleeping too long on my flight back from the US.

Not sure if I’m awake or asleep at the moment!

*accidentally* looked at the arse of the estate agent who was showing us round a house.

Looked at some girl and though why the hell is she wearing sun glasses inside the shop..just as I see her guide dog… Not felt such a git in a while…

Ate too much cake. Felt a bit sick.

your mum

I handed my notice in – no idea what I’m going to do now but it’s something I should have done ages ago. 😀

agreed to work on Saturday and ended up standing around watching one of the most incompetant people i’ve ever met manage a job.

in the end it was just embarrassing. don’t think i’ll bother working for them any time soon.

Focused all my attention on the hottest girl in the club, oblivious to the second hottest girl focusing all her attention on me. Doh!

Chased a better rider down a trail above and beyond my abilities, now nursing some very bruised ribs and ego.

I didn’t bring this home with me

probably shouldn’t have got so close to this big fella.

licked piss of a thistle

Attempted to reverse my trailer up a steep hill from various approaches, taking probably a year out of my ‘very expensive to replace’ clutch. Time for a front mounted towbar I think.

Watched this 🙄

Ikea…..I went to Ikea….. 🙄

Wookster wins.

There is only one rule to Ikea – only shop on a weekday evening after 7.30pm

And buy meatballs.

Stupidest thing, rode the best descent with the pro-pedal on. The whole 2.5hr ride was setup for that descent (Cave Dale). Fox should do a special model for stupid people like me.

@techsmechs – glad you are ok, enough to type anyway

@WCA – you are encouragable !

@huws – I was lucky enough to have a big stag leap the drystone wall right in front me, magnificent.

@johndoh – glad you are OK and 90% right on IKEA, to be 100% you need to pursue the wife/GF to go instead of you and also to buy the packet mix for the meatballs sauce.

Left my helmet, gloves and glasses in a mates car after our Saturday ride. Yesterday morning woke to clear blue skies and thought what a perfect morning for a play on the bike as the kids were staying at my parents.I then realised my mistake and found my mate had gone to visit his wife in hospital 35 miles away.

you need to pursue the wife/GF to go instead of you

No, no, no, no! NO!

NO

Just think of all the candles and eggnog whisks they inevitably come back with.

Set myself on fire with an angle grinder 😆

and started using strava 😳

Started using Strava. Got stalked by GW

Paid £20 for a meal I couldn’t eat at my son’s rugby club – seated on a table of strangers, none of whom were interested in rugby. Awful.

Got a little bit overconfident in my own radness at Wharncliffe, had what should have been a nothing crash (washed the front and went over the bars sidewaysish) but landed on a log with pointy bits and a rock next to the trail. Still have a dead leg and the wee gouges in my side rub every time I turn my body, and most of my torso hurts when I sneeze.

Not go for a ride on Sunday with me mates at Cwmcarn in all the sunshine.

Instead I argued with the missus and then ended up at a 1yr olds birthday party.

>killmenow<

Stupidest thing I did over the weekend was set Pienaar as my Fantasy Football captain. His sending off and ban meant I dropped a place in the league. Luckily still top of my work league so didn’t have to buy the cake.

The sensiblest thing I DIDN’T do was remember to fit those new brake blocks to the commmuter before this mornings ride in. I was reminded about that (again) when trying to stop at the junction at the bottom of the hill where I live. Fffffffffkkkkkkkk ssssshhhhhhh.

not going for a ride in all that gorgeous sunshine we had on sunday, fog to start clearing to blue skies and sunshine, perfect biking weather. Instead I decorated the downstairs hall & then made sunday roast. 🙁

Stupidest thing I did was a ‘Terminator’ approach to the free-for-all final game at my sons paintball party, 7 kids can do a fair bit of damage when you just keep walking straight at them, the good thing was the kids thought it was ‘awesome’ and that I am beast!!!!

Strangely – and I’m thinking about it hard this, but it genuinely seems to be the case that I didn’t do anything stupid this weekend. Perhaps something will turn up in the post, or on facebook, or in the local paper to inform me otherwise though

Set myself on fire with an angle grinder

To do that properly stupidly you need to inexplicably take your gloves off the pat out the flames so that you get burning polyester stuck to your hands. Then – with your top like a smouldering, distorted shrinky dinky and large holes burnt in the crotch of your jeans and your hands looking like portions of chinese spare ribs…… travel home on the bus in rush hour.

+1 on IKEA, coupled up with an argument with the wife.

I was right though.

After coming back from my second ride of the weekend I questioned my wife’s technique for packing for our house move which she had been doing all morning.
It was ill advised and led to the first silent treatment of our 5 week old marriage.

A night race on a singlespeed. I am a crap rider at the best of times, but this was just utter humiliation.

I don’t think anyone else’s bike weighed more than 3 grammes.

inexplicably take your gloves off the pat out the flames

I did that a few weeks back! What? Why is no-one surprised?

Got married!