I have a contender.

I was out this afternoon on a route where there is about 200m vertical descent in a very rapid 2 km. I got to the bottom, a nice man walking his dog opened the gate for me and in shuffling the bike through the narrow gap I pressed the very hot rear brake disc firmly against my calf, branding myself.

It bloody hurts now!

One broken finger taking a wheel out to fix a puncture. Cold fingers from beta-blockers meant that I didn’t feel it and so continued with the ride.

I think you’re winning.

Easter Monday this year on the Monday night pub ride.

Immediately after a good techy descent that I rode without incident I managed to go OTB on the flattest most innocuous piece of trail dirt I’ve ridden.

Ever.

Torn ligaments in the hand and the prospect of a couple of weeks off the bike meant I did more running. Until I slipped on a wet tree root and fell forward -using the same bloody hand to break my fall.

Out for 10 weeks 👿

Not MTB but a bloke in our climbing club put his back out whilst lacing his climbing boots up at Stanage.
Helicopter job.
🙂

Dr Kevin Anderson if anyone knows him.
He loves being reminded about it.

Guiding earlier this season.

1. Left my knee pads at home.
2. Borrowed a set from one of the other guides.
3. Left those behind at the chalet.
4. Looked over my shoulder to check on my group.
5. Tapped the end of my bars against a marker pole at the side of the trail.
6. Went down like a sack of tatties.
7. Ripped my knee to bits (refer to 1, 3).

Doing an uplift at FoD, a mate managed to fall over his bike in the car park, whilst pushing it as he didn’t want to fall off in the car park whilst riding it
😳

On a biking weekend away and before I’d even got on my bike I decided to spin my rear wheel with the bike upside down and then insert my finger into the rotor.

Cue quite a lot of blood, finger tip hanging off and a trip to the local doctors surgery and a miserable day sat in CYB cafe waiting for my mates to finish riding. I then rode Penmachno the next day with a rear brake only (it was my front braking finger) and the tip taped on with insulation tape (it was very wet and my dressing came off within seconds).

When I got home a few days later the nurse at my doctors said I might like to look away when she inspected it – full flip top finger as perhaps unsurprisingly it hadn’t knitted together over 2 days riding in the rain :-/

Last summer riding a bit of trail I know well, got grit in one contact lens but thought it’d blink out, which it didn’t. so then just before a small chute I got grit in the other lens too. Cue steaming from both eyes and a lack of decent vision. No problem I think, there’s nothing to hit down here so I’ll stop at the bottom.

Turns out there was something to hit after all, a tree stump which stopped my front wheel dead (small pringle) then I did a pile driver otb head first into the ground. Cuts & bruises, concussion, new helmet…

years ago i bought my 1st full sus frame and my 1st disc brakes. built up the bike and took it for a ride round the backyard and back into the workshop. rode into workshop at speed to see how this full suspension would deal with the substantial upstep.
rather well as it happens and i entered the shed a heck of a lot faster than i expected, cue the new brakes which stopped the bike on the spot. OTB and put hand out – little finger dislocated, pointing nicely 90 degrees in the wrong direction. grabbed finger pulled it back into place and then passed out.

About 3 years ago I clipped a tree with the end of my bar and little finger. It was bloody cold so I didn’t feel any pain, about an hour later I took my glove off and saw that a large flap of skin hanging off my finger and blood everywhere. I pulled the flap off put my glove back on and carried on. By this point I was so cold that I didn’t feel any pain at all.

The next day it was obvious that there was something really wrong with my finger. Turns out I had snapped my ulnar nerve and my little finger had no feeling at all for 6 months. The side of my finger next to it was also numb but the other side of it was fine.

Riding along a flat fire road two weeks ago. Wee puddle on the path … I’m a boy, so through the puddle I go. The puddle turned out to be hiding a two foot hole filled with mud. Superman over the bars, split head and broken hand. Superglue for the head in hospital. Bloody sore hand.

Rode into a wheelie bin on Wednesday night ride… It wasn’t there on the other nights I usually ride!

Broke my Tib and fib slipping off the bike, didn’t even fall over.
**** special me.

Done that you could even recognise the make and size of the rotor on my leg. Worst flipping the bike doing wheelie in the Marin car park before the ride even started, I hit the ground that hard all I could think at the time was I hope that soft squidgy feeling was mud otherwise I’ve just shat myself.

I had an otb at revo about 4 weeks ago. Managed to completely style it out by clearing the bars with my feet and casually running down the trail. Only thing is I ran straight into a tree, ripping ligaments in my shoulder and raising my collarbone. Sick.

Changing the brake pads and had the bike upside down and stupidly put my finger near the rotor ,boy there sharp ! , took most of the nail of and tip of the finger , glad to hear im not the only one who’s done it .
1979 when I was 16 i’d been through a long grass field and tried to pull the grass out of the front wheel while I was riding , hand got dragged into the front wheel and I faceplanted the tarmac , lost 2 teeth and and a broken Septum ,broken nose in English ..

I hit the ground that hard all I could think at the time was I hope that soft squidgy feeling was mud otherwise I’ve just shat myself.

Cheers I just lol’d.

Lifting bike over stile, bars span round, clocked myself in the eye, ended up with a black eye and a cut on my eyeball had to go to mootefields eye hospital to get it treated

Broke my bike at cannock last week doing a 1.5m drop to flat (accidently), which I walked away from unharmed, so carrying my broken bike down a fireroad to the car park, I managed to implant a large amount of carbon splinters in the back of my leg – 1 week later I’m still taking bits out

Not mtb …. cycling to the tennis club when I was a kid. Kids don’t hold the raquet in your hand. Que immediate OTB with raquet handle through front spokes. Sore head but nothing serious. Tennis raquet fine. Forks bent & knackered, wheel not looking too clever. A long walk home.

Smashed pelvis after the words I’m only nipping out for an hour, I’ll pack when I’m back.

Fell off on a bridleway. 4 weeks in hospital total hip replacement 6 years later and I’m back….. falling off!

Earlier this year, on the cut trough at the end of R15 at Swinley, front wheel hit a small stump, cue a rapid deceleration; midway through the inevitable otb I experience a sudden tackle/stem interfacing. 9 months on and the old fella has distinct socialist tendencies!!

Last week at Kirroughtree ; just starting ‘The Judgement’ innocuous piece of track ; not sure what happened but suddenly heading for massive face plant . Stuck the hands out …. Two fractured arms and one fractured thumb . Cue three mile walk to car and still not quite sure how I got the bike onto the roof rack …. 😥

This would have been so funny to watch. Hope your feeling better tho buddy.

passtherizla – Member
I had an otb at revo about 4 weeks ago. Managed to completely style it out by clearing the bars with my feet and casually running down the trail. Only thing is I ran straight into a tree, ripping ligaments in my shoulder and raising my collarbone. Sick.

And this is just a perfect bit of writing.

the old fella has distinct socialist tendencies

I looked down and thought my front wheel skewer looks like it wasn’t full closed, so went to kick it in while going along. My foot went in to the wheel – Bang foot goes in wheel hits forks, bike stops dead, I go over bars. I thought I’d chopped my toes off with the spokes as well as being battered from the over the bars.

This happened in front of a group of people sitting on a bench, I jumped up got on bike and rolled off before checking for damage to me and bike as I was so embarrassed! 😳

Yeah feeling much better still can’t lie on ‘that’ side yet, reckon another couple of weeks easily. Beginning to agree with the anti neck brace crowd.

Flying down a hill on the road I needed to take a left into Hanchurch Woods.

I decided to ride around the gate on the fire road only to be stopped by the barbed wire which had been twisted together so people could get under it.

It stopped me by gouging out big chunks of my arms. I still have the scars 20+ years later!

Not as silly as breaking my leg slipping into a swimming whilst on holiday back in July though!