Ok I think I have worked out the correct formula:

Dislike = {N x [(a + t + m + l) x r x d] – (f + b)} x c / h

Where:
N = number of bikes
a = number of rides per week
t = time spent working on bikes
m = money spent on bikes
l = loss of holidays/weekends caused by working on/riding bikes
r = rarity of bikes and parts
d = dirtiness/muddiness of bikes and kit
f = fun had by spouse on or around bikes, this number can be and often is a negative number so remember this in your working out.
b = brownie points earned – scored for school runs, shopping trips, family outings when there’s an MTB race on locally etc.
h = Hours in a Day.
c = some indeterminate female factor constant that varies in direct correlation to the phases of the moon and can increase the intensity from annoyance to wild hysteria. The constant can be determined precisely by plucking any number from thin air and randomly multiplying it by another large number.

Righ off to test my hypothesis. 😀

I think you’re a bloody genius.

You need to factor in dirtworker usage mate.

A M A Z I N G !

I think you might want to change r for “How often you tell them how rare/nichey your bike is”.

It’s unlikely they’d know. Or care. And as they don’t care, the more often you tell them then the more annoyed they get.

Oh, and you need to sort out your m and n too.

just cos i’m pedantic…

“constant that varies”

That’ll be a variable then.

IA – Member

just cos i’m pedantic…

“constant that varies”

That’ll be a variable then.

N o no no – you are getting muddles. A constant that varies is not the same a sa variable. A constant that varies is the “buggins factor” – that is the number you need to multiply by to get the right answer/

Don’t you need to factor in a value depending on whether or not you wear the trousers in your house? 😉

Excellent.
Could you give us a sample result?

14 !

Dislike = {N x [(a + t + m + l) x r x d] – (f + b)} x c / h

ohh dear, were to begin, first units.

number x anythign is acceptable as long as the resulign units refelct this

number + number must be in the same units

so i propoose…………

disslike = [N x d x(a+l/52)x (c/h) ] – f

where f is the same fomula but applied to the spouse. And is suspect rarity/niche and cost are already proportional to N and a (more bikes increaces the nicheness of each and cost, more rides ups the need for more niches and wear and tear).

So for me = 8 x 1 x (1 + 21/52) x (16/24) – 0 (im single and dont get much time to ride)

therefore my imaginary spouse hates me about 6.

uplink – Member
Don’t you need to factor in a value depending on whether or not you wear the trousers in your house?

Sorry thought that “no” was a given. You have to remove the Bollox Factor of a bloke who is sufficiently deluded to think he wears them, but this value is invariably “null”.

Variable S missing! (S=time spent on STW discussing bikes and relationship issues)

Great stuff. Probably wise to add a function relating to the “white lies” told about the price of bikes, kit etc – generally halving the true cost of all the stuff in the garage when asked? 😉

I need some guidance on what values to use please. I fancy working this out!

N = Easy
a = Easy
t = In HOURS i take it? Or days?
m = Easy
l = In days?
r = Is this out of 10? If so how do I quantify it? 10=rare, 1=common?
d = Again out of 10,
f = Again -10 to 10, say?
b = 1 point per job?
h = Easy
c = Do I ask her for this one?

A worked example would be good!
🙂

Dislike = {N x [(a + t + m + l) x r x d] – (f + b)}

= (1.5 x ((0.75 + 1.5 + 100 + 0) x 1 x 2) – (2 + 3))

t in hours per week
m in £ per month, plus I divided the total cost of my bike by 12.
r is a scale of 1 to 10 for rarity, 1 being not rare at all
d again is a scale of 1 to 10 for dirtiness, 1 being the cleanest.
f again scale of 1 to 10, 1 being no interest in bikes.
b, 1 point per activity? Per month score

Decided c/h wasn’t require especially with ‘f’

Result = 304.75

Oh dear…
15498 for me

MrsT

due to both my penchant for deceit and the volatility of the female mind I think I would score anywhere between -100 and 1 billion

I would like to test this over a set period of time, but I don’t think there would be any trends that appeared or any correlation to anything tangible – mainly due to ‘c’ (which should surely be ‘p’ or ‘rw’)