Confrontations
Shouldering
‘I’ll break your bones’

Shit. Really is shit. Have thry been told to do this to make cricket sexier?
Hate it.

Always been in the game, or at least for a long while, difference is now you can see and hear all the threats!

Not watched cricket before?

Is this just because England are getting horsed?

Caught the last three overs this morning. Not very dignified was it?

Petulance personified all round IMO.

Can’t see the point of watching a game of any sort,that might end in a draw after five days!!!

Yet you can see the point in reading and posting on a thread about such a game?

Yes.

Pretty sure its always been like this, just we get better coverage of it now!

I’m sure we were sticking it to the Aussies when we were winning! and As Jimmy Anderson said its nothing that he wouldn’t do…

damn you should try and play league cricket! ten times worse

league cricket is as bad. I umpired under 17s last summer, testosterone and competition….jeez!

Nothing new at all.

We just get to see/hear it all now, in HD.

Don’t reckon there is anything wrong with it. I do think Lehmann has encouraged them to dish it out and it shows they care.

I’ve seen people decked in league cricket!

This stuff has been going on for a long time. The real watershed for the real incessant and nasty stuff was the Kerry Packer World Series Cricket. This thrived on intimidation, both physical and verbal, and the ‘theatre’ it provided. Mind you, if you can back all the bullshit up with Roberts, Holding, Daniel, Garner, Croft, Lillee, Thomson, Pascoe etc then it is far more effective. Before stump mikes a lot of it was racial or very personal.

I played a reasonable standard of league cricket for fifteen years. There was probably an ‘incident’ every two or three games. Again, racism not far below the surface a lot of the time, but a lot of it just verbal diarrhoea.

Lots of blokes used to give it all the big talk, then get all steamed up and lose their cool if someone riled them. One bloke I played with genuinely thrived on it, though. He was an Aussie (unsurprising), short in stature (again unsurprising), but he often needed to provoke some real needle to get himself going, particularly when bowling, but also batting! Most of the time he bowled a load of insipid dross until he got in a frenzy, then he bowled a lot quicker, more accurately and did more with the ball.

It is really being bigged up by the media in this series. The guys actually playing will hardly be aware of it. Happily the days of a punch up around the back of the pavilion are over…..

The fact is that having a hard cricket ball wanged at you by someone who can bowl quick can do funny things to some people. I have seen ‘big men’ who also played rugby etc get all wobbly about facing quick stuff, whereas sometimes you see wiry young lads who absolutely thrive on ducking, diving and taking a quick bowler on. It is a different kind of fear.

The main reason I gave up league cricket. Too many dicks trying to emulate their heros (sic). Sad and rather pathetic in the true sense of the word.The worst I experience was a twatish Dutch touring side when I was playing for the SAC in Paris (not league stuff), As an opener it was great fun knocking their quickies over the tops of slips. Didn’t need to respond verbally to all the crap just enjoy how my limited technique allowed me to keep snicking past the slips for 8-12 an over 😉 (for a while). In the end they just tried to bounce m out, which was a bit scary pre-helmets etc.

Interesting to compare this with the All Blacks philosophies that include sweeping the dressing rooms clean and the ability to a keep a blue (rather than red) head. Compare that with Broad winding MJ up in the last over. What was the point??? Will the current England team leave “their shirts in a better place”? I doubt it.

Summary of the AB philosophy in today’s Torygraph.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/active/10427619/The-All-Blacks-guide-to-being-successful-off-the-field.html

Yes I agree with that sentiment about league cricket.

I remember in the latter stages of my playing days when I was mostly playing (and enjoying playing) in the seconds. Anyway, I got a call-up to the firsts (I’d played 1st team cricket for over ten years).

Anyway, I bowled pretty quick and some quite decent stuff. Later on when I was batting, this little shit pipes up from slip ‘come on lads, we must be able to get this second teamer out’. This didn’t really bother me, but I found it quite amusing that someone ten years younger than me followed local cricket to such an extent that he knew quite a lot about other squads and their players. He hadn’t got any runs opening their batting, so I just said to him that I had a life outside of this game and he obviously didn’t, and it was a bit sad that he’d not got any runs in the game that he was probably looking forward to all week. Strangely he shut up after that. Well, until I got skittled, then he told me to **** off.

Still, I didn’t really need all this aggro when I paying £8 match fees every game, plus it was really eating into bike and family time, so I packed it in, and have never been seriously tempted to go back.

My then 12yo was sledged by adults who really should have known better, as he and his friend put up a gallant last wicket stand of 18 overs to play for a draw in a Sunday friendly. We were only 200 runs down, but draw we did achieve. They should have declared, of course.

Some gems here though. Nothing abusive. Jimmy Ormond’s is my all time favorite.

Well done to your lad for standing up to adults who should have known better. As a result him and his mate will have looked like men whilst the fielding side will have looked like spoiled brats!

The Jimmy Ormond one was quite a widely anticipated event, he just had the opportunity and the brass neck to get it out of the locker.

Some of the best stuff I’ve heard of:

Mike Hendrick (former Notts, Derbyshire and England seamer). Has a stone dead appeal turned down by the umpire, so he asks him “what would you do if I called you a c-bomb” (attempted filter avoidance)?

The umpire says “well obviously I’d report you to Lords and my guess is you’d be in a lot of trouble”.

Hendrick: “oh, what about if I only thought it, then?”

Umpire: “well, there’s not much I can do about that, is there?”

Hendrick: “all right then. I think you’re a ……..”

Another beaut was an old umpire called Arthur Jepson actually ‘sledging’ Geoff Boycott in a county match. Hendrick was involved again. There was a lot of ‘banter’ and it was pissing the umpire off.

Hendrick hits Boycott on the pads, but probably missing leg stump. He let out a half-appeal, but the umpire then triggers Boycott with no hesitation.

Boycott says “oi, Arthur. What’s happened to your guide dog?”

Umpire: “I’ve sacked him for yapping, same as I’m doing to you, now piss off”.

Makes me chuckle every time, especially imagining how furious our Geoffrey would have been.

Best sledge I’ve heard was a response to Glenn McGrath by Eddo Brandes –

McGrath: Why are you so fat?

Brandes: Because every time I make love to your wife she gives me a biscuit

“West Indian batsman Viv Richards was notorious for punishing bowlers that dared to sledge him. So much so, that many opposing captains banned their players from the practice. However in a county game against Glamorgan, Greg Thomas attempted to sledge him after he had played and missed at several balls in a row. He informed Richards: “It’s red, round and weighs about five ounces, in case you were wondering.” Richards hammered the next delivery out of the cricket grounds and into a nearby river. Turning to the bowler, he commented: “Greg, you know what it looks like, now go and find it.”

Mind you, if you can back all the bullshit up with Roberts, Holding, Daniel, Garner, Croft, Lillee, Thomson, Pascoe Johnson etc then it is far more effective.

Mind you, if you can back all the bullshit up with Roberts, Holding, Daniel, Garner, Croft, Lillee, Thomson, Pascoe Johnson etc then it is far more effective.

Yes – you can also add “not getting humped by over two hundred runs” into the ‘context’ of sledging effectiveness.

I have no idea what Broad was on about, but even if Johnson could not think of anything better to say he could always fall back on “Have you seen the scorebord lately Broady?”. Whilst adding “see you in Perth, where I’m going to knock your block off you little ****”.

Ah happy days 😕