I think there should be a big Izal re-marketing campaign
Izal's weird. It doesn't absorb or remove, just redistributes.
Chat Forum
Something I had never thought about until yesterday (bum wiping content)
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Posted 1 year ago #
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if I go for a poo and then have time for a quick shower, I'll fit it in.
Pervert.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Izal's weird. It doesn't absorb or remove, just redistributes.
Like a snow plough for the arse.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Most interesting.
Long time F2Ber to start, moving to nearly standing both ways buffing.
Just come back from a few weeks snow camping in Greenland. Snow latrine + squatting. I could get used to that. Very quick evacuation, due to the aligned bowel position. Interestingly, the squat position meant that the B2F was a more natural wipe.
Due to the lack of showers (and changes of pants), a wet one finish was utilised, after thorough use round adjacent dangly parts.
Very refreshing, everything drying off in the wind. Nice view, too!
Posted 1 year ago # -
Funny thread this.. LOL.
F2B then once B2F then return F2B for the remaining "flow process until it squeeks"
I'm amazed too at just how much/many rolls a Woman gets through in 1 week. If she's away on Business (herumph) I get through 1 a week, when shes back it's at the very least 4..
I think shes stocking it up ready for some sort of Nuclear attack where she'll make a temporary tent with it to shield us both, I might on that occasion just cr*p myself at that particular moment.. and cower outside laughing.Posted 1 year ago # -
Nice view, too!
You've not sold it to me I'm afraid.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Izal is the John Wayne of toilet paper. Hard as f*** and takes no s***.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Unless I'm in someone elses house in which case I'll just use the sink.
Remind me not to invite you round for a curry.
Posted 1 year ago # -
I don't think this debate will be over until the human race has re-sealable cat bums (like the non drip sauce bottles). Then F2Bs and B2Fs will be no more
Posted 1 year ago # -
This will run and run...
Posted 1 year ago # -
goon - Member
Izal is theJohn WayneChuck Norris of toilet paper. Hard as f*** and takes no s***.FTFY.
Posted 1 year ago # -
This will run and run...
You can get some tablets for that.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Bisto is best
Posted 1 year ago # -
Not recommended in Paris.Ever ran out of paper and had to use the roll?
Posted 1 year ago # -
Can someone record this one, like the Picolax thread, please. Wiping the tears away here....
Posted 1 year ago # -
Ever ran out of paper and had to use the roll?
In which case it's best to use it as sleeve, obviates wiping.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Scraper, if you get the angle of attack just right is fine with roll.
ALternatively, I guess you could tear it up a use bits.Posted 1 year ago # -
The tube works best if you peel it apart in thin layers so it's paper-like; more supple and lasts longer. Useful as it only seems to run out when you've had a particularly explosive pebble-dashing session.
Top tip.
Posted 1 year ago # -
question to parents and other nurses/care assistance/health type workers...
which way do you wipe when wiping another person?
most impressive/horrific thing i've seen was a female patient who managed to push out a log about 4inches wide (imagine the width of a 2 litre drinks bottle and about the length of a 500ml bottle) then stagger out the bathroom to announce she didnt even need to wipe. We had to call dynorod in to unblock the toilet as trying to break it down to smaller parts with a stick didnt work.
Posted 1 year ago # -
At a previous job, the company called Dynorod out to unblock the drains in the toilets next to our office. The root cause of the disgraceful smell was never found, which is unsurprising as it was actually as a result my colleague coming round to my house for beer and fajitas the night before. We'd spent the following morning deflating in the office.
Posted 1 year ago # -
On the subject of what to use when you've ran out of toilet paper - do most folk not take a newspaper in with them?
Posted 1 year ago # -
It's the 21st century, SBZ. Sadly, there is not (yet) an app for that.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Is there an app that you old use to see if the post dump polishing job was up to scratch?
Posted 1 year ago # -
I spent a summer in spain and the local way when you were caught short was to hop behind a wall, select a suitable stone(my mate said you get your eye in as a kid to find the right one), slightly rough, and wipe away. It was too hot for vegetation use. Quite effective once the technique was honed.
Posted 1 year ago # -
I'm a B2Fer approaching from the rear! The trick is to start high in the crack then stop strictly at the brown exit. This ensures removal of any debris that hasn't fully disconnected during the final crimps.
Then I move to F2B,again from the rear , the key is to reach right past the exit to the gooch and start from there, just incase the initial B2F has created a 'poo moraine'. A scooping action for the first couple of wipes helps remove excess debris.
Then polish with Tescos Apple scented toddler wipes.
I have also got into the habit of trying for a number 2 before any shower, too good an opportunity to turn down I find!
Posted 1 year ago # -
Surely all you need to do is an initial wipe off of the main clag and then put some baby lotion on some more loo roll and wipe the remainder off. Good enough for babies! That's what a friend of mine recommends anyway.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Coming to this one late, but...
What's the reasoning behind calling a clean one a "cling film"?
I normally just call it "clean break" or "tailing off perfectly".
Posted 1 year ago # -
If we're getting posh here then keep a packet of baby wipes in the fridge and take them with you when you do for a dump. Luxury.
Posted 1 year ago # -
This is why I lurk on the this forum.
(I read somewhere).If you have to wipe more than 3 times you have a problem in that department.Posted 1 year ago # -
Beware Mustangs
Because if it doesn't fall it MUST 'ANG.........
Posted 1 year ago # -
INRATS, but I assume this has already been posted...
http://www.funniestvideosonline.com/video.php?video=1522&Wipe_Your_Bottom_Song
Rather oddly, I first saw this when it was on some clip show in France. I'd just stumbled in after a few too many Pelforths and realised I'd left the TV on. This was showing. Scary.
Posted 1 year ago # -
But you can't flush baby wipes
Posted 1 year ago # -
(I read somewhere).If you have to wipe more than 3 times you have a problem in that department.
Nah. Hairy arsed blokes will have a lot more trouble getting rid of all the clingons.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Plop.
Posted 8 months ago # -
This thread is bizarre. Why don't you all just use a bidet then dab? None of this wiping malarkey
Posted 8 months ago #
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