I’m not quite sure what problem they are supposed to be solving? They don’t appear to keep you dry, don’t appear to cope with wind, take up a lot of space and are potentially gouging to other people’s eyes.

Nevertheless, so folk seem to swear by them..

Only ever take one when wearing work clobber, so I don’t turn up at a customers looking like a drowned rat. Use my golf one, it’s wind proof and massive so does a pretty good job of keeping me dry.

Good in hot countries when its too warm to wear a jacket.

Sorry can’t help! Never had one, never needed one I’ve got something called a coat! Seems to do the job

They don’t appear to keep you dry

you’re using them wrong. Walked to the station in pissing rain this morning, with a sturdy decent sized brolly I got there with slightly damp shins instead of thoroughly damp all over.

I’ve got something called a coat!

unless it’s waterproof it will soon wet out and if it is waterproof unless it reaches the ground all the water runs off onto your trousers (are they waterproof too?). coat is ok to get you from your car to the work/home front door you’ve parked right outside of 🙂

If an umbrella isn’t keeping your head dry then it’s user error. But they are possibly the most irritating things in the world and the irritation level turns up to 11 if you happen to be with someone carrying the umbrella and they try to protect you from the rain.

People should be forced to take lessons to operate them safely.

they are for crowds. and specifically they are for stabbing anyone over 6ft in a crowd in the eye. I’ve been caught in the eyelid twice by them and more near misses than I can remember

They’re so obviously dangerous, we’re just blasé about them because they’ve been around for so long – if they’d never existed and you invented them today you’d have no chance of ever getting them on the market

🙂

Certainly one of my pet hates is people poking me in the eye with one or standing next to me at, say, bus stop while rain runs off their umbrella and all over me. Likewise they walk into a shop and shake their umbrella create a small lake at the entrance ready for me to slip over.

I’m a waterproof hat may myself, much more practical.

Treated myself to a nice brolly from London Undercover a couple of weeks ago, while I own outdoorsy/technical fabric jackets I prefer to use a brolly and an overcoat as that means my beard doesn’t get wet and I can wear a hat not a hood.
Like a lot of things (high heels, white trousers, urban 4×4’s etc) not the most practical but I’m happy to put up with the inconvenience.

I worked with somebody in his 70’s who said that as a junior clerk in London it was all about how rapier thin your umbrella was so not being able to afford the best they would strip the brolly and get their mum/landlady to sew the brolly cover even slimmer and then pull this over the ‘stick’. The appearance of a fine brolly was retained, however you would see clerks piss wet through carrying a ‘brolly’ when caught out by a storm 😆

Its all fun and games until someone loses and eye…. But personally if I ever lose and eye, and I’m not actually having fun and games immediately before hand, I’m going to be frikkin furious.

They need a safe minimum canopy operating height too. Longer handles for shorter people should do it.

Or rectangular. Use widthways to keep you dry, then spin 90 degrees to narrow potion for passing without overlapping.

Or simply a ban.

(high heels, white trousers, urban 4×4’s etc) not the most practical but I’m happy to put up with the inconvenience

Just trying to picture that ensemble with a beard and brolly…

Not much to do with umprellas but yesterday I read that the so-called “Manchester suit” was black because it ddn’t show the filth that fell from the sky onto your clothes, especially in rain, during the height of the industrial era.

I’m not quite sure what problem they are supposed to be solving?

Try standing at the edge of a lonely football pitch in the West of Scotland for two hours on a dreich November Saturday whilst 14 ten year olds merrily splash up an down the sodden astroturf in a grotesque parody of Association Football as it’s played by the Brazilians.
Inspiration will come to you and you will see the problem.

Someone explain umbrellas to me..

Are you really that stupid? My 2 year old could explain what an umbrella is for.

Just trying to picture that ensemble with a beard and brolly…

Pay a premium subscription and you get HD video access

People should be forced to take lessons to operate them safely.

…and be retested every 3 years.

As for Golf Umbrellas on the high street. Aaaaagh.

They don’t appear to keep you dry

You know you’re supposed to open them out and hold them above your head, right? They don’t keep you dry if you don’t do that.

Great for fishing under if you get them tethered down right.

It’s funny, though: I’m going up to London one evening a week at the moment (from the Gatwick area) and last week, in the pouring rain, I found the standard of umbrella driving to be somewhat superior in the capital to that I usually experience in the semi-rural setting within which I live. Still a pain in the whatsit, though.

YEMV, of course.

If an umbrella isn’t keeping your head dry then it’s user error.

Definitely user error, or a cheapo brolly.

Carbon poled golf ones from decathlon are the business, especially for about £8. Anything that folds up small enough to go in a bag is asking for trouble.

You know that umbrellas aren’t supposed to catch the rain?

Useful if you can’t remember the password whilst trying to take a bridge off the Germans in World War 2.

Don’t forget: He is the man who said “more and more of our imports are coming from overseas” and “I know the human being and fish can co-exist peacefully”.

no_eyed_deer – Member
I’m not quite sure what problem they are supposed to be solving?

Not sure what you’ve been doing with them, but I’ve found them to be highly effective at keeping the rain off and me dry.

They actually work best in warmer weather when a waterproof is too warm. Shite in the wind admittedly, and I am blessed with just enough awareness to not be a complete git and show courtesy for other folks.

You know you’re supposed to open them out and hold them above your head, right? They don’t keep you dry if you don’t do that.

Thankfully, I’ve fixed the above fundamental error.

They don’t keep you dry. They give you a sense of being dry. Whenever my GF wheels hers out I do an inward eyeroll. The extra ‘dryness’ affected by this billowing mass of fabric and pointy wires, is really not worth the faff of having to hold the thing/negotiate it around objects, people, etc.

Weatherproof stuff actually covering you is ace though.

Seriously. If the umbrella had never been invented and someone went on Dragon’s Den with it as a new funding idea, the concept would be laughed out of the studio.

Umbrellas are generally a bit shit in most of the UK. Usually windy when it rains. Work better in some other parts of the world where it’s not generally so windy (also when it’s a it hot for waterproof clothing). Japan in rainy season is a good example.

They inform foreigners that they are dealing with an Englishman.
That and the appalling dress sense, bad teeth etc.

was in venice and rained good god most people (tourist) use umbrellas…pure madness 😯 should be banned!

I love my brolly (Fulton automatic Jumbo Black). Small enough to put in a bag. Flips back easily on the odd occasion it gets blown out. Great for the odd shower or when you’d rather not wear plastic. And yeah I still enjoy ‘deployment’. Push the button and WOOSH a full size canopy in seconds. Nice too when caught in the rain with the missus, as there’s something cosy/gentlemanly about it.

Has to be said there is a certain skill in managing a brolly in the wind.

They don’t keep you dry.

Did yours come with a manual? maybe you should read it?
Mine’s did and now, as well as keeping most of me dry (not the lower half of my legs, but most of the top of me) it makes me look like an english jedi (of which i am neither)

. They give you a sense of being dry.

As opposed to a sense of being wet?

This is the only use for them I am aware of. Hate the things in the cities when wielded by short people.

The Jedi Brolly is actually a thing – I might be tempted to get one

They don’t keep you dry. They give you a sense of being dry.

Personally I quite like the sense of being dry that they afford. I do agree to a certain extent though, I never owned one living in the UK for 20 odd years, but bought one after moving to Lyon the first time it rained but was too hot to wear a coat. I now live in a colder climate but still use one, as it gives the freedom to wear any non-waterproof jacket I like even if it rains.

Agreed that you need at least a half decent one though, my m+s one folds up small enough for a proper bag but wouldn’t fit in a woman’s handbag and is about as small as I’d go.

Does the rain only come straight down where you lot live then?

Where I live, we have wind, quite often, and this blows the rain all over your nice smart suit and an umbrella only keeps your head and shoulders dry. And even then if the wind is in your face, you need to put the umbrella over your face.

If that’s not a really obvious design flaw, I have no idea what is!

I’m eagerly waiting for n-e-d’s thread asking for an explanation of tents.