A,err, friend of mine has fair to bad Nobbys from time to time.
Anyone know of any good natural or alternative remedies that can be used alongside the usual creams and stuff to ease the problem?
He's willing to try anything, aslong as it's not powdered endangered beasties... 
Thanks in advance (on his behalf, of course!)
*tries to work out what body part/condition combination rhymes with 'Nobby Nic'*
WTF are Nobby's.......
Sheltered life n all that
Nobby Stiles?
Nobby Stiles?
You need to get you knees up Muvva braan.
Nobby Stiles, innit!
Chalfonts.
LOL at CFH!
Painful if you're indulging in a bit of Dressing Gown.
nobby nics ? 
And for the solution..
This may sounds painful and bizarre, but get someone to ping them.
Ceramics...
Farmers
Wire brush and Dettol.........................for anyone old enough to remember Billy Connolly on Parky
smirking alot here, but I take it no one has anything useful to say ?? 
Good luck?
walk in clinic
Box of matches will do the trick.
You light a match and then burn one of them grapes.
And thats it, next time one (or more) pops out you just shake the box of matches...
and you will see how quickly they disappear
*spits out grapes he was just munching on*
Painful if you're indulging in a bit of Dressing Gown.
'Dressing Gown'..???
A, err, friend of mine had a small chalfont recently. I he found the following useful:
1. drink lots of water (make sure you don't get dehydrated so your stools are nice and loose)
2. when you feel the urge to go for a dump, go straight away (obviously, wait until you actually get into the toilet, you won't make many friends dropping a log in a meeting), rather than waiting until you're touching cloth
3. don't sit and strain for ages, do your business, finish the paperwork then exit the bathroom - no reading War and Peace
4. walking helped coax the bugger back in
Obviously, my friend's case wasn't severe, but it gave me him into a whole new world of experience
No more farmer Giles? Cut down on alcohol, de-stress your life, eat more fruit and have Weetabix for breakfast every day. Oh! and don't strain, take a magazine to the lav and let nature take it's course.
I, errr, I mean my friend, suffered to the extent that they went to the hospital to see a consultant. It's mostly down to diet.
I start a thread about Ballet, meanwhile you lot are talking about piles.
I despair, I really do. 
I start a thread about Ballet
I think the same advice stands for ballet as well.
De-stress, rehydrate, eat better, sleep more and never use the same arse cream for too long.
'Dressing Gown'..???
Rhymes with...
wedding gown... 
Rhymes with...
bending down?
new in town?
The queen has lost her crown?
Give up...
Brown.
True story:
Before Mrs MFL & I got married, she had a minor case of the Nobbies, and I suggested some Savlon cream to help sooth the problem. In her infinite wisdom she approached her mother who only had Savlon disinfectant (the stuff in the bottle!!!!!) and proceeded to lather the area with that. Oddly enough she didn't complain again, but then neither did she ask for any advice lol!!!
Natural help for Noddies, bran & lots of it.
bran
Brown bran and lots of it.
sitz baths apparently according to the weird homeopathic type book someone got given as a gift at work?!
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