Viewing 28 posts - 121 through 148 (of 148 total)
  • 'smacking children'…what's the STW opinion?
  • CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    You find that funny? So you mean behaviourism does work with behaviours?

    matt_outandabout
    Full Member

    Well, seeing as it is illegal to smack in Scotland, we have refrained. 😉

    hora
    Free Member

    Just love angst and anger wrapped up in liberalism from stw

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    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    Illegal in Scotland? Really?

    Junkyard
    Free Member

    Yes its the only thing in Scotland you cannot batter

    IGMC

    behaviourism does work with behaviours?

    dannyh
    Free Member

    I think the main thing to remember when disciplining kids, be it raising your voice, smacking, or imposing some kind of penalty, is to be in control when you do it. If you are in danger of losing your temper, you have to stop and calm down.

    Discipline needs to be proportionate and consistent, you can’t guarantee that if you’re always losing your rag.

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    So JY, we can agree that that behaviourism works with behaviours?
    is Malala’s desire for education a behaviour?
    Is homosexuality a behaviour?

    Junkyard
    Free Member

    Behavior or behaviour is the range of actions and mannerisms made by organisms, systems, or artificial entities in conjunction with their environment, which includes the other systems or organisms around as well as the physical environment. It is the response of the system or organism to various stimuli or inputs, whether internal or external, conscious or subconscious, overt or covert, and voluntary or involuntary.

    Behaviorism, also known as behavioral psychology, is a theory of learning based upon the idea that all behaviors are acquired through conditioning. Conditioning occurs through interaction with the environment. Behaviorists believe that our responses to environmental stimuli shapes our behaviors.

    According to this school of thought, behavior can be studied in a systematic and observable manner with no consideration of internal mental states. It suggests that only observable behaviors should be studied, since internal states such as cognitions, emotions, and moods are too subjective.

    I do this to educate and leave you to ponder on whether you can see me doing it and observe it 😛
    I wont be replying as i doubt this is real discourse but if it was you have your answer and the power to google and educate yourself

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    I think you may have confused copy and pasting with education.

    I asked some simple questions, you set out saying that i had oversimplified to the extent of being wrong. You’ve yet to show that.

    Junkyard
    Free Member

    😆

    vickypea
    Free Member

    I was smacked frequently as a child and teenager (including being slapped across the face), I think it did do me harm and I have never smacked either of my boys (aged 16 and 8). I’d hope that my children are motivated to behave because they want to do the right thing, not because they live in fear of a smack.

    scotroutes
    Full Member

    +1

    Too many folk on this thread seem to be equating smacking with anger.

    scotroutes
    Full Member

    No

    Coyote
    Free Member

    I’d hope that my children are motivated to behave because they want to do the right thing, not because they live in fear of a smack

    Exactly Vicky.

    deadlydarcy
    Free Member

    I find the idea of somebody “being in control” as he or she administers a smack (or whatever we want to call it) to a child slightly sinister. I could forgive somebody doing it because he or she lost his or her temper and thus self-control, but doing it in a calm and controlled manner? Hmmm…no likey the sound of that.

    fervouredimage
    Free Member

    I find the idea of somebody “being in control” as he or she administers a smack (or whatever we want to call it) to a child slightly sinister. I could forgive somebody doing it because he or she lost his or her temper and thus self-control, but doing it in a calm and controlled manner? Hmmm…no likey the sound of that.

    I agree entirely. I remember seeing a mum grab her 6 year old who had run into the road and smack him on the back of his legs. She did it in absolute fear, panic, anger and a momentary loss of self control. As I’ve previously said, I’d never condone the hitting of a child but I do, in some circumstances, understand why it happens. This being one of those moments. Smacking a child methodically and in a cool, controlled manner is far more disturbing.

    Scienceofficer
    Free Member

    Both of my children have been through a ‘hitting stage’ and during that, both of my children have each received a single smack from me, followed by a discussion of how it made them feel and why they shouldn’t hit people, because it makes other people feel like that too.

    Beyond that, I see no value to it. All it teaches them is fear of consequence, not what they should or shouldn’t do.

    Parenting by the ‘be-good-or-I-will-hurt-you’ book doesn’t seem very useful to me. Although like many on here, I took a few smacks as a lad, it taught me little about my original offence other than to be more careful not to get caught next time.

    pondo
    Full Member

    “Fear of consequence” – that adds an interesting side dish to the debate. If you could measure the comparative values, would you rather your child never ran into the road because he/she got a slap on the legs as a youngster when they once looked likely to, or rather they never ran into the road because they once did and got knocked down by a (hopefully) slow moving and attentive driver?

    hora
    Free Member

    So again. Its LEGAL, recognised by law as allowed within certain parameters.

    The laws an ass?

    vickypea
    Free Member

    When I was at infant school in the 1970s, the head teacher (appropriately named Mrs Batterson!) would call out in assembly anyone who had misbehaved and smack them hard in front of the whole school. I also remember my class teacher repeatedly shouting and shaking a girl (aged 4) who was crying on her first day. I was terrified of the head and other teachers, and and I went through a phase of refusing to speak to the teachers. Consequently I was described by the head as a “difficult child”!

    At secondary school there was a cane, and it was always the same few kids who got it, so it didn’t convince me that it was a deterrent.

    hora
    Free Member

    Vickypea I put through a window, set off a fire alarm and set off a fire extinguisher.

    The Head welcomed me in (nicely), showed me his extensive collection of canes. I remember the cabinet on the wall was beautifully made. He asked me to chose.

    I chose the thinnest.

    I was never naughty again.

    The kids that were repeat offenders at our school were abit thick (parent alcoholism?) And in the C band classes.

    vickypea
    Free Member

    Hora – I do see your point, but there may have been alternative forms of discipline that would have been just as effective for you that didn’t involve the cane.

    yunki
    Free Member

    did we get any further with the discussion about smoking children..?

    hora
    Free Member

    Tazer?

    vickypea
    Free Member

    I do my best to ignore my son if he’s playing up. He can’t abide being ignored!

    molgrips
    Free Member

    Hora, lots of people were caned, didn’t seem to stop misbehsviour though did it?

    yunki
    Free Member

    Hora, I was beaten as a child – corporal punishment with a wooden spatula..

    I think it left me as a quite cowardly adolescent and adult, with a sometimes overwhelming amount to prove to myself..

    I guess a positive was that this led to some incredibly interesting lifestyle choices and caused me to explore avenues in life that most folk would find very intimidating.. but this was always so very nearly on the edge of going catastrophically wrong, and often did!

    Like you, I also found it hard to comprehend that there were other paths and answers in the world outside of my own experience.. 😉

    It’s also left me with a bit of a short temper though, which has regrettably led to a few isolated incidences of smacking my own kids, when it was clear that more constructive methods would have been preferable..

    Vortexracing
    Full Member

    It has it’s place when all other avenues have been exhausted.

    or in such instances as when a very small child decides to put their fingers in plug sockets.

    Explaining to them that if they do that, the electric will kill them, doesn’t work at that age, so a small smack on the hands soon gets the point across.

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