It can’t be just me that sometimes wakes up with a huge sense of relief that the shit I got myself into was just a dream.

This morning it was to find out that I hadn’t crashed and rolled two police vans full of passengers because of trying to do rally skids, that I hadn’t spent half the night wandering around a black tie event in my underpants due to someone stealing my clothes, and that I hadn’t managed to offend most of my wife’s family by voicing a clear and unambiguous assessment of why my sister-in-law is such a pain in the arse.

Phew.

Yes and what’s all this stuff about walking down the street or even going to work naked?

I woke up having been dreaming I’d been at a champagne reception. Which was odd, and a slightly disappointing start to the day.

Analyse that 😀

I’m at work. Can I wake up now, please?

I dreamt I was awake. Then I woke up and found I was asleep 🙂

Last night I dreamt I had a drug addiction and was getting annoyed at how difficult it was to take some up my nose whilst running a marathon*

* may if been as a result of reading skagboys by Irvine Welsh before falling asleep.

I had a dream that reoccured, or at least I think it did, about bodies I had buried in local fields.

I found it very hard to distinguish between it being real and not real, and was quite worried about it for a while, as it kept happening.

I’m pretty sure now that it didn’t happen.

I dreamt I was eating a spider.

When I woke up I was eating a spider.

I can still feel those legs in my mouth. *shudders*

I did once dream that someone stole my car. When I woke up I looked out the window and realised I had scrapped it about 20 years previously.

I have had some dreams of caving which are so incredibly real I have to question the way the mind works.

I’m an insect who dreamt he was a man and loved it. But now the dream is over and the insect is awake.

Some bar-stewart lazy bums try to steal my cash in my dream so I gave them Muay Thai spinning elbow. I could see my elbow going into their jaws in slow motion. 😆

you seem quite disappointed it was just a dream chewkw?

Quirrel – Member
I had a dream that reoccured, or at least I think it did, about bodies I had buried in local fields.

I found it very hard to distinguish between it being real and not real, and was quite worried about it for a while, as it kept happening.

I’m pretty sure now that it didn’t happen.

I often wonder if this is how people with multiple personalities go around killing people and not really knowing about it.

I have dreams about cycling…..what is worse is I ride exactly like I do in the real world so I get off and push up hill after getting tires, mince down things, get off and walk down massive drops.

Why can I not ride red bull rampage and do double back flips?

wwaswas – Member

you seem quite disappointed it was just a dream chewkw?

A bit disappointed but actually rather embarrassed as I was really elbowing my pillow … was a bit worried for a second if someone would be sleeping next to me. It was a proper spinning elbow as well …

I woke up the other night worrying whether something I’d done the previous drunken evening actually happened or I’d dreamt it.

Then I actually woke up and realised the previous evening, the drink and the possible dream/event and the first “waking up” were all a dream.

Mrs Stoner is a runner.
When she dreams, she dreams of running.

It’s like sleeping next to a Spaniel chasing rabbits in it’s dreams.

Few months ago i had a dream that I was riding round the woods pulling perfect wheelies! I went out for a ride a couple of days later and found my wheely technique was loads better than before (although still not as good as the dream!) It felt much more natural finding the balance point as I had ‘learnt’ to experience this in my dream! Dead serious

Muay Thai spinning elbow

Nope. Can’t find that on my takeaway menu. Does it come under rice or noodle dishes?

slowoldman – Member

Muay Thai spinning elbow

Nope. Can’t find that on my takeaway menu. Does it come under rice or noodle dishes? [/quote]

Probably comes under noodle if it’s spinning coz you can’t really spin rice. To spin rice you need to process it into noodle first then perhaps spin them afterwards. You might be anal by saying that noodle originated from rice hence you can spin rice but that is wrong. Everyone in the far east will laugh at you if you say you can spin rice. Spinning noddle yes but then some noddles are not span but lay flat to be cut into thin strips. There you go … noddle and the spinning elbow. 😆

I once dreamt I had woken up in my parents living room. What’s going on? How did I get here? I’d better get out. But then couldn’t open the glass door they have in their living room no matter how hard I forced it.

I then woke up and realised I was trying to open the window of my 2nd floor flat.

So I suppose the relief is not so much that it was only a dream (it has freaked me out a bit since) but that I was unable to open the door/window.

I liked it better when you talked about zombies all day, chewy – sort of knew where we were with that

It’s like sleeping next to a Spaniel chasing rabbits in it’s dreams.

I dreamt I was on my bike being chased by killer, blood thirsty, sheep along the South Downs Way just East of Ditchling Beacon once.

My wife said she could tell when I got to the hills ‘cos my legs started moving at a slower pace and then I’d sprint on the flats.

^^ Killer blood thirsty sheep? Ewe.

I had a long and cathartic chat with somebody from my past last night.. and woke up feeling much happier.

Strange, but good.

Relieved to find out my parents weren’t buried under the garage floor.

I don’t even have a garage!

^^ Killer blood thirsty sheep? Ewe.

The Downs were rammed with them…

I had a HORRIBLE dream on Monday… that it was Tuesday and I had just missed the deadline for a 5000 word report I’d been writing for the past few weeks. When I woke up I honestly thought it was Tuesday and turned my PC on to check the day/date.

I dreamt chewkw was spinning me some yarn about rice.

Dare not to slumber! Dare not to sleep!
Dare not believe, it was merely a dream!
Yore I was judged.
The gallows were built in the court this evening,
They’ll come for me — 5’ in the morning
Oh no wait,
Got a bit carried away

scaredypants – Member

I liked it better when you talked about zombies all day, chewy – sort of knew where we were with that

Actually those people who tried to rob me off my cash resembled zombies hence spinning elbow. I mean the slow motion of elbow into the jaw was good fun but I was fuming. Get your bloody hands off my hard earned cash! 😯

slowoldman – Member
I dreamt chewkw was spinning me some yarn about rice.

Try not to dream of me too often as you might like me in a funny ways. 😆

shhh dont wake him

Mrs Q gets a beating in her sleep every so often.

This is normally due to me either kicking or punching zombies, or aliens.

There have been a few strikes that have really hurt her, thankfully they were on her legs, so the bruises could be hidden.

I once woke up mid swing as I was about to whack an alien, to realise that it was a huge one and I was heading for her head, I changed aim, and punched the bedside table hard enough to bruise up my hand badly.

It’s been a while since I’be had a bad one, although a few weeks ago I did violently launch the duvet across the room with a hefty kick.

I have vague recolection of waking up to a sore foot from getting out of bed and hoofing the bed one, waking us both up, and on questioning as to why I had just punted the bed, I told her I was kicking an alien that was under it.

My work stress seems to come out in dreams.

Edit – weirdly whenever this happens, she pats my head says something soothing and lets me go back to sleep.

Quirrel are you a Colonial Marine?

^ oddly no.

Not sure why zombies and aliens are the main bad guys. I had terrorists a few months ago, but they were aliens in disguise

Mrs Stoner likes her rabbit? Or did I misread that?

Quirrel – Member

^ oddly no.

Not sure why zombies and aliens are the main bad guys. I had terrorists a few months ago, but they were aliens in disguise

Coz zombie maggots are real! They rule you in your life and will even get to you in your dream. Just try not to mistake your Mrs for a ZM while dreaming …

THREAD.OF.THE.DAY.

Even chewkw’s waking world is a dream.

Last night I tried to explain to my girlfriend in my sleep about the roads made of minced meat. I even remember her waking me up, and I was convinced that she was being deliberately obtuse claiming to not understand the simple concept of all the roads being made of meat. I tried explaining that if you take some of the bread crumbs off a Scotch egg, in the shape of roads, then that’s like the world with the meat roads all over it. She’s Colombian and doesn’t know what a Scotch egg is.