What would you be willing to do to be able to go home to a dream every night? I’m looking at something but…

Rural, isolation? Reliance on car for shops, stuff for the kid/s to do.
Close to an hr commute vs 15-45mins just now.
Oil central heating, expensive?

Plus points, space, lots of it.
Huge gardens.
Next door to a superb Inn.
Basically, the house is amazing.

How would you prioritise?

One persons idyll is another’s nightmare.

Same with priorities for what each person defines as happiness. As for where they are in life, age of kids, satisfaction at work.

FWIW at the moment, oil for central heating is dirt cheap. Doesn’t sound as though you’ll be too isolated if it’s next door to a pub, so popping round for a bowl of sugar in your dressing gown and slippers still sounds like it’ll be a goer.

What is your intuition telling you?

How important is affordability to you? Likewise logistics for school runs? Do you require approval from others?

Only you can answer those. My priorities matter not to your life decisions.

Just curious, cheers. Always keen to hear how people have got on after making moves that they were nervous about.

Lots of dream houses in the countryside near us, but it’s the isolation for the two kids and the need to rely on the car for everything that would stop me.

Have a nice house in a nice village with excellent facilities on tap, midway between Nottingham and Derby for work and bigger facilities. 20-40 commute for both of us, half an hour walk to secondary school for Jnr.

“Nice” will do us for now.

My wife and i have been talking about moving and building our own but have yet to find somewhere.

We like being close to civilisation which has limited us. Short commute, public transport and walking distance to shops means we only need one car and even in the worst winter are not stuck.

Our current house is fantastic. All it needs is off street parking, to be a detached with a littke more privacy, a slightly bigger garden. Id like it to be a little lighter also.

I wouldn’t compromise on commute. I do it twice a day. No point having a nice house if you spend 2+ hours a day commuting on top of 9-6 working.

Is it a dream home if you have to make large compromises?

Yep doesn’t sound like a dream if you are compromising that much.
Oil heating is very unpredictable cost wise and can be very expensive.
I’ve had a house similar to the description, the rural thing can an issue for the days that you run out of milk or stuff like that.

I wouldn’t underestimate the implications of an isolated location if you’ve got kids.
You don’t say how old they are but our experience is once they left the village school where we live & went to the secondary in a nearby town their friendship circle was much more geographically spread. Our village has very poor public transport links meaning we’re constantly taking them places – it’s a sacrifice you expect to a degree when they get to that age but it can be a major inconvenience if they literally can’t get anywhere alone.

We went through a similar dilemma three years ago. We moved from a small end-of-terrace in a village (pub, lots of friends but no shop) to a semi detached ex-farm workers cottage in a rather isolated spot. We have about a dozen other houses along the same lane within a ten minute walk. The nearest shop is about 20 minutes walk, and 25 minutes across the fields to the pub. Schools would be about 15 minutes in the car, and we both commute about 35 minutes each way. We are about 10 minutes in the car from three supermarkets, and a similar distance from a major railway station and town centre.

What we lose in convenience we gain in lifestyle. The house is only a 3 bed semi but with masses of potential to extend, which we are planning. We have just shy of an acre. We can see five other houses from our house, and are surrounded by fields and woodland. It is absolutely silent, with only distant road noise when the roads are wet, and we have miles of footpaths for walking the dogs. We absolutely love it, and wouldn’t change current circumstances for the world.

Some people baulk at the idea of living in an isolated spot, and having to rely on the car for shopping. However, I’d like to venture that most folk will drive to the supermarket wherever they live.

I would like a pub and shop a touch closer, but with our limited budget and living in Hampshire we had to compromise somewhere. My advise is – if you think you can live with the compromises (and there will be some) then go for it…

Sacrificed easy access by rail to the nearest city to get a bigger place in a nice area with great schools.

If I end up getting a job there in future it’ll just mean a nice long bike commute.

A 1-hour commute each way every working day would put me off

I personally would never sacrifice our personal wealth for the “big flash house”. Hence the reason we live in a good sized, with big garden, 3 bed semi. Slowly getting the house sorted (been here 12 years 😯 ) but that’s builders for you.
Full rewire, ensuite to our room, Windows and insulated board replaster this year.
We could go and spend 250k on a house but the mortgage would have to go up and be long term.

5.5 extra complete days of driving per year out of your life? No thanks.

It’s a 10 hour round trip when I go to the office. That kind of thing?

The location, access and things for the kids to do (and schools) are a big part of the house fulfilling ‘dream’ status, along with amount of garden, rather than the building itself alone for me.

The place in the OP doesn’t sound like a dream home

The one hour commute thing is odd. I never had a commute that short when I was commuting. It’s hard to imagine somewhere you work could be less than an hour from somewhere you’d be prepared to live.

You have a very limited imagination.

t’s hard to imagine somewhere you work could be that close to somewhere you’d be prepared to live.

Really? I have a 12min bike ride to work.

Live in central Cambridge, work is on the edge of the City, ride along the river to work every morning…

Personally I’d not call anywhere with an hour commute a dream home, as the commute would ruin it for me.

There you go. I’d rather hammer nails into my knees than live in central Cambridge.

I did commute from Tetbury to Cambridge for the best part of year funnily enough…

A great house with big gardens is my idea of heaven.

And lets be honest unless you live in a town, you need to drive kids everywhere anyway, or use public transport which can be just as annoying and inconvenient.

And kids don’t need a leisure centre, bowling alley, cinema etc. A rural location can be a great playground. And kids don’t flippin’ visit each other and ‘play’ nowadays – they just message and facetime!

does it has a usable Broadband speed? with kids that would be the make or break in our house.

Don’t go too hard on Cambridge. if you like the city life, then living in is not a bad thing. Cambridge is not _that_ bad a place to live.

Personally, I couldn’t do it. I was born in rural Suffolk, grew up there and like seeing fields. My current choice of Papworth means I get fields less than five minutes walk away for the dogs and yet I am still close enough to work (Science Park) that I only have to waste 45 minutes in my car getting there on the days that I go to work.

Rural isolation can be nice (my mum has a farm), but it takes an age to get anywhere , broadband is typically rubbish and when stuff goes wrong, it’s expensive. My mother has, for example, no mains water or sewerage and no mains gas. Electricity can be flaky and, as said before, broadband is dire.

On the other hand, she has a nice farm house and a garage that I would just about kill for. I just wish the ceilings were not so low!

I could pick any number of places within 15 mins of my office that would be perfect to live.

The one hour commute thing is odd. I never had a commute that short when I was commuting.

I find anything over 45mins simply takes too much of your life to be anything other than a chore. Being able to get to and from work stress free and relaxed helps make a place somewhere worth living.

if you like the city life

That’s the thing. I’d spend 3 hours in a car to avoid it, so a commute is anything but a sacrifice. Living in a town would drive me mad.

As for running kids around, you’ll find there’s less to run them to. They do different stuff to urban kids.

As for running kids around, you’ll find there’s less to run them to. They do different stuff to urban kids

Having grown up in the countryside that is very true, but it’s also really frustrating when everything that involves other people requires either a bus or car journey.

Yeah, I hated it when I was a teen. Great as a child.

I’m not sure it makes so much odds in the broadband age (assuming it’s not that rural). Teens don’t actually leave the house anymore do they?

As for running kids around, you’ll find there’s less to run them to. They do different stuff to urban kids.

Depends where the kids are schooled. I lived out in the sticks and had a half hour car journey or 2 hour train journey (including lengthy walk at the home end) to get to school. this meant that while all my mates were popping in and out of each others’ homes, I was left out of many activities. I did pick up and find local activities to occupy my time, but it wasn’t the same.

From an adult perspective, I lived, as a younger man, about 40 miles from work and around a 45-60 min drive. Colleagues thought I was crazy until it was pointed out that they were probably spending just as long, albeit fewer miles, on the commute from their suburban box to the office as me, but they didn’t have the relaxing rural lifestyle. I wouldn’t put little sasquatchette through the same as me. I’m happy to live in an area where she’s close enough to friends to have a good healthy social life.

I have the dream home in the country – lived here 20 years all my kids grew up here and I would not have done it any other way we are lucky with a village pub and shops within a couple of miles – but times change and the last kid is off to uni in the summer so we are selling up and looking to move into a local market town – atrouble is your requirements change as you get older – anyway if any one wants a small estate in north yorkshire here you go bridleway from the door http://www.robinjessop.co.uk/property/gatherley-house-moulton/

I wouldn’t put little sasquatchette through the same as me. I’m happy to live in an area where she’s close enough to friends to have a good healthy social life.

Same here. Lived away from pals down country lane when little. Had to wait until I was allowed to ride my bike up to the village.

Don’t want my kids to be in same situation and I like being able to walk up to town myself anyway.

9 mins on foot to Madame’s place of work. Junior on foot to excellent schools from 2.5 to 18. A short walk to the station which is also the regional bus hub. Town centre 2km. Pleasant residential area with local shop/services including a 50m outdoor swimming pool that is open year round. Bus stop less than 100m away. 90 up 50 down fibre. An extensive network of MTB trails starts 1km away.

Location is close to perfection, the house itself is small and the garden a bit bigger than I’d like. It was also cold, damp and in need of repair when bought. Small is beautiful because local taxes are per m2 and are astronomic. Small and now well insulated means tiny energy bills, about a sixth of what the solar panels bring in. Solar thermal too helps.

For the same cash we could have bought something flash with a swimming pool in the local hills. Life would have been a lot more complicated and I doubt we’d have been as active, especially junior who can get to band practice/the pool/athletics/skate spots/basketball/the disco/the cinema/music venues/most of his mates homes on his own.

The gable end of our house is visible in this pic:

I think the reality is unless you have an unlimited budget then there will always be compromise.

Mine is my commute. 45-55 minutes across to the other side of Dartmoor, but living on Dartmoor needs a shit load of cash and I don’t want to live in the town I work (even more expensive).

I don’t want to live in the sticks having grown up there, my wife does having grown up in the town. We’ve settled on a spot on the outskirts of town with good views and space but close enough to walk in. However it’s tiny so currently trying to raise the funds for an extension. It still won’t be as big as what we could buy if we moved west to Cornwall but then I’d be commuting for 90mins each way.

In your profession Dan, I’m sure you’ll be able to get a start supply of logs, that’ll limit your oil use if ye open up a fire or put in a burner. Is there woodland nearby, of cultivated fields? The former will be great for the boy to play, the latter not so good.

Boys are easier to keep amused in a rural location, girls not so. My sis had to move into town as she has 3 girls, all hitting the age they are scunnered for 8 weeks in the summer hols as they lived too rural (moved to Melrose, lots less whining now!) from their friends.

The locality to a great pub helps, but pretty much every pub I know has peaks and troughs of being great, especially with regards to food, although that shouldn’t be as much of an issue now as pubs that don’t sell decent food in rural locations will really struggle to survive now with the drink drive culture the way it now thankfully is.

Wherever you live is a compromise, sounds like the biggest one for you guys will be your commute, as long as you’re okay with that, it all sounds good mate.

That’s the thing. I’d spend 3 hours in a car to avoid it, so a commute is anything but a sacrifice. Living in a town would drive me mad.

We all make our own choices, but to me, 3 hours a day is a lot of your life wasted in a car!

3 hours? **** that.

I love living in a bustling town, could probably count half a dozen pubs and eateries within 200 metres, Indy shops etc too, and 5 minutes riding to get to the trails. Some folks down south seem to have the worst of both worlds, huge commute to work, huge commute to hills.

3 hours a day is a lot of your life wasted in a car!

+1 Giving up commuting was one of the best things I ever did for quality of life. Really can’t see the point of having a nice house if you are never there. I’d rather live near the things I do. I’d like more out buildings but I know people with several and they are all full and they want more too. N+1 I suppose. I don’t think I’d make many sacrifices for a house, I would for a lifestyle.

Dream house has to be within a bike commute of work for me. In fact, any house has to be. I just wouldn’t put up with a job/house combination that meant I couldn’t do that.

So, as far as I can tell:

Living in town is busy and shit
Living in town means a small house, which is shit
Living in town means a small house, which is cheap and brilliant
Living in the country is isolated and shit
Living in the country is isolated and brilliant
Commuting >2 mins is shit
Commuting means you don’t have to live in town, which is brilliant because town is shit and also stupid because town is brilliant. And shit.

But above all, EVERYONE ELSE is doing it wrong.

Plus ça change…

I grew up in the sticks and loved spending my days riding bikes and making tree houses. I used to have mates coming to sleepover most weekends. I currently live in London and can’t wait until I’m in a position to move somewhere rural.

Being reliant on the car isn’t a big deal as the only traffic is horses or tractors, but worth considering things like how kids will be getting around. If I missed the school bus it would mean my mum would end up being an hour late to work.

Now my parents are nearing retirement they are looking to move – running costs of an old house huge and Dad wants to be in walking distance of a pub.

If that’s your house oldmanmtb, you win the thread!
Must be gutting to leave it.

That is indeed a stunning house. Beautifully done out too.

My commute: