My name is Honeybadger, and I also had the squits.
Couple of weeks before xmas, came in from work, went to the loo and thought 'that was a bit funny' and didn't think much of it. Went again 45mins later and thought 'hmm, my digestive system is obviously having a kerfuffle' and again didn't think much of it. Increased frequency to 10-15min intervals and a change to the appropriately coined rusty radiator water, continued for a couple of hours, still thought 'it's ok, it'll pass through, just MTFU and you'll be fine in the morning.' Quarter to one in the morning, doubled over on the netty with cramp and what must have been some sort of high pressure sprinkler attachment shoved up my bum, had attempt to stop so I could lean over sink and vomit. Text boss to say I wouldn't be in work, spent next couple of days surviving on water, immodium, and lucozade, hugging the toilet and sobbing quietly to myself.