Viewing 40 posts - 1 through 40 (of 76 total)
  • Road rage/car horn – can't help myself
  • nickewen
    Free Member

    One day I’m really going to get myself into bother with someone and probably get battered.. but I just cannot help myself when someone does something daft. I feel a responsibility to at the very least beep at them and if they’re within earshot let them know what they’ve done wrong. Recently a few people have said “you love that horn mate” when I’ve been driving so thinking this may be becoming/already a problem. Anyone else a habitual tooter / hot head when they are at the receiving end of stupidity in the motor??

    As a bit of venting and to ask what others would have done, here is tonight’s example:

    My GF and I are walking to the car after coming out of the supermarket. It closes at 10pm and at 9:40pm the place is dead. There must be 1000 empty parking spaces. Some divvy is parked sideways across two disabled bays. Not the end of world just some nobber. But.. as I get in my car and pull away he’s pulled away maybe 5 seconds before me and stopped dead in front of the shop blocking the only **** road out of the half of car park I’m in while his wife and daughter casually start filling the boot with shopping. Without even thinking I beep at them. The sheer **** ignorance and selfishness of it has me wondering if it even happened! His wife then turns to me and says “Are you **** blind we’re putting the shopping away” at which point I said “are you stupid you’re blocking the only road out and the place is empty!”. Then.. her quite large knuckle dragging husband sticks his beak out the window and starts giving me grief. I’ve lost it by this point and I’m trying to get out my car and my GF is NOT happy and stops me. Anyway we both pull away without getting out.. To top it off a taxi then tried to T-bone me about 15 yds later with no lights on (horn again).. At this point I was told to pull over and calm down by my other half.

    Anyway – If my lass wasn’t there I’d probably have either been chinned or got done for chinning someone else. Need to change me ways but I just see red when someone takes the piss on the roads (or car park!).

    Anyone left the red mist/road rage mindset behind and what was the turning point? Also – can car horns run out?

    shifter
    Free Member

    If it helps, I don’t think we beep enough here. Maybe if we did it more it wouldn’t get the crazy reaction.

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    Are you sure it’s just the driving that’s winding you up – take a look at the rest of your life too and see what you can do to ease it all

    As you say, you could well end up being very sorry for being confrontational

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    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    Usually, if someone has done something stupid or dangerous, it means you have to take.evasive action or respond quickly. If you have to take evasive action or respond quickly, then you really need both hands for driving. If you have a spare hand and spare concentration to hit the horn, then the manoeuvre probably wasn’t that dangerous

    jimjam
    Free Member

    nickewen

    Anyone left the red mist/road rage mindset behind and what was the turning point? Also – can car horns run out?

    It depends what I’m driving/riding but generally it happens less and less as I get older. When I used to own an old hilux with big tyres it went slow and I rarely got any sense of “rage”. Saying that, no one ever cut me up or did anything naughty around that thing.

    In something small or fast it seems to be elevated somewhat. A bicycle being the ultimate in that regard. I sometimes find it very easy to lose my shit with drivers when I’m on one of those things.

    lazlowoodbine
    Free Member

    My wife is maimed from a Transit going into the back of our car years ago and tailgaters gave me red mist in a way that kinda worried me sometimes.

    I have had my collar felt in regard to expressing my pugilistic rage (Raffles ref.) and have realised that I’m then the loser. Better to be calm and really show how you feel.

    Example: bloke followed me so closely for several miles of A road that I couldn’t see his bonnet in the rear view. I ignored him best I could and concentrated on the road in front. When we got to a small roundabout I stopped, opened his door, took his keys out and chucked them over the hedge. Told him the error of his ways and that he was lucky I was reformed, then I drove away, whistling.

    nickewen
    Free Member

    Cheers for the replies all. In terms of the rest of my life I’m very happy, easy going and don’t do confrontation.. I will caveat that by agreeing with Jimjam! I do lose my shit on the bicycle sometimes mainly (I think) because I know the consequences are lethal in many cases. Only last week I had a lass in a corsa brake check me several times as I tried to keep up with traffic through a set of roadwork traffic lights (to keep the flow) after she’d already close passed me earlier. She then thought it’d be awesome to show me th raw power of her piece of shit 1 litre car by horsing off to a red light. She got the hairdryer treatment

    Davesport
    Full Member

    Heavy bag gloves and a bag.

    cloudnine
    Free Member

    You need a louder horn..

    nickewen
    Free Member

    Sorry to hear about your wife and the rear shunt Lazlo, that’s horrendous. Tailgaters are another of my pet hates. Well played with the keys/hedge move! I would have LOVED to see that.

    nickewen
    Free Member

    Haha I have recently put a bag up in the garage a dug out my old bag gloves! And yes I think the loud horn is an excellent idea. Or maybe a comedy “fail” type horn?!

    beefheart
    Free Member

    I installed a klaxon (awooooogaaaaa) horn in my old van.
    Do it- it will definitely stop you tooting in anger, as it just made people smile.
    Just make sure you swap it back at MOT time.

    stumpyjon
    Full Member

    It’s something I also think about, driving standards and courtesy are pants. However like you Ive slowly realised that if they’re nobby enough to do what they’ve done hitting the horn won’t have the desired effect, what we really want in that situation is a grovelling apology and that isn’t going to happen, instead of getting satisfaction from using the horn you’ll get even more wound up. I also feel the duty to show people the error of their ways but again have realised my intervention will only make things worse. I’m trying with some succes to modify my behaviour, think superior thoughts and let I go having realised there is a good chunk of society that are really selfish ********. Other thing to remember is actually most drivers are fine, how many vehicles do you pass daily who give you no issues.

    Only time for the horn is if someone is drifting into your lane or manouvering without looking.

    Bottom line is only you can change but it feels like you’ve done the hardest bit and realised the change lies with you, now just work on it.

    hora
    Free Member

    I use my horn fairly regularly – it’s there in the centre of your wheel right infront of you for a reason. To warn people of your presence or danger etc.

    nasher
    Free Member

    Here in Italy, horns are used regularly, cars will hoot at cyclists to warn them that there isxa car behind, nothing aggressive.. Italians do park anywhere. But if you are hoggong the motorway lanes then god help you

    funkmasterp
    Full Member

    I have recently become calmer with these sort of incidents. A few months back a gentleman in a car beeped me and gesticulated angrily because I had the audacity to be stood in a keep clear box waiting to cross the road. There was just about room for one car next to me, three cars from a red light. He wasn’t there when I originally stepped out

    He proceeded to drive around the back of me, missing my leg by an inch or so. I gave him the classic V and he then wound down his window and started having a go. It was fine until he came out with “you don’t pay road tax, you shouldn’t be in the road”. I’ve grown used to people trying to kill me when I’m on the bike, but I thought I was still safe walking. Needless to say I completely lost my shit, which I shouldn’t have done

    He got out of the car and I told him to get back in. After some more harsh words from both of us I began to walk off. He said something else, honestly can’t remember what, but it really made me angry. I turned and kicked the hell out of the back of his car. It was either the car or him. Long story short I called the police when I got home because I felt terrible about the whole thing. Ended up paying for the damage and it was dealt with as a civil matter.

    Made me think about stopping and calming down before reacting. Seems to have worked so far. My actions were foolish and ended up spoiling two people evenings. I just hope he learned a valuable lesson too.

    kayak23
    Full Member

    I’m very happy, easy going and don’t do confrontation..

    Road rage/car horn – can’t help myself

    I feel a responsibility to at the very least beep at them and if they’re within earshot let them know what they’ve done wrong

    Without even thinking I beep at them.

    I’ve lost it by this point and I’m trying to get out my car and my GF is NOT happy and stops me.

    If my lass wasn’t there I’d probably have either been chinned or got done for chinning someone else.

    😀

    mahalo
    Full Member

    i have honestly never sounded my horn in anger, ive tooted if someone in front hasnt seen the light turn green, or ive spotted someone i know but thats it.

    i find it quite funny when someone gets the rage towards me, i just smile and wave, tens to wind them up more! i almost feel embarrassed for them.

    as an aside, ive only ever had people raging when im in the car, never ever when im in my white van! folk are infinitely more tolerant…?

    bails
    Full Member

    In the car park, was there room to just drive around the stationary car?

    Were you annoyed because he was holding you up? If so, you cause yourself more of a delay by hanging around to argue than by just getting around the obstruction and carrying on with you journey. If you don’t care about the delay then why are you angry?

    Is it more that you get annoyed when you see people doing driving “wrong”? Again, you need to think about it. People doing silly things while driving makes you angry. Why? Because it’s dangerous and it causes delays? You’re making both of those things worse by reacting in the way you do.

    barkm
    Free Member

    practice acceptance, then you’ll just laugh which is much better for you, your health and anyone sharing the car with you.
    No amount of ‘rage’ is going to change the behavior of anyone, it’s about the most futile waste of energy I can think of, and life is way too short to spend it angry at strangers however stupid they are.

    FuzzyWuzzy
    Full Member

    I generally only beep when some idiot drifts across lanes on a motorway or cuts across them on a roundabout (as they’re alongside me in both circumstances). I do gesticulate a lot though at the general stupidity of most drivers and get more wound up than I should do…

    lalazar
    Free Member

    I regularly horn to wake up pillocks at traffic lights staring into phones. In general though driving is an absolute burden and it brings out the worst in me probably the only time I really get wound up.

    matt_outandabout
    Full Member

    Roll a fat one? It seems to work for some on STW. 😉

    grahamt1980
    Full Member

    Beep when people are drifting or being vacant, couldn’t care less if the are being morons and not really affecting me. Tail gaters can just stay behind me and get wound up (can understand the poster aboves reaction considering the circumstances though).
    I just enjoy winding people up when they get stroppy over nothing, pulled in front of someone at the petrol station to fill up, he got all passive aggressive in his car because a van had blocked his exit, stupid people so i just take the view it has shortened their life a little so less time for me to put up with them

    nathb
    Free Member

    Don’t get mad in the car, why would I I’m in a big metal box plus it’s all being recorded on the dash cam.

    On the road bike however I do struggle not to say something, it’s hard not too when they’ve just used their 1.5/2 ton killing machine against you (particularly when it’s actually on purpose, thankfully police around). But I have found a solution to that, a pollution mask! I can full on shout at the top of my lungs and no one can hear what I’ve just said. 🙂

    canopy
    Free Member

    i was indicating trying to merge into slow moving traffic and the **** in the lorry behind wasn’t slowing down. once i finally made it into the slow lane i gave him a **** signal. resulting stand up shouting match with a lorry driver on an off-ramp – yeah thats me. no not anymore.

    in my 20 mile commute i see all sorts of crazy shit.. not just middle lane hoggers, but 3rd lane hoggers. people texting, talking on their phones, doing makeup.. obviously hungover/still intoxicated.. so involved in singing their heart out their eyes are closed..

    i’ve learned chill, take my time. i don’t have time pressures to be at work on the dot and its better for fuel economy too 🙂

    DezB
    Free Member

    I avoid diving as much as I can cos I get wound up by everything.
    It’s not the “rest of my life” or any of that crap, it’s just people’s driving is so arrogant, ignorant, incompetent, stupid, discourteous and annoying!
    Indicating particularly! It’s got to be one of the SIMPLEST (sorry Cougar) things in the world – I’m going this way, I’ve got a little stick next to my little finger, I just push it. There’s nothing to it, yet.. 1 in 5, maybe less drivers are capable/bothered to do it, particularly on roundabouts.
    Anyway, I no longer have to drive to work, so that’s good.
    Even if you chill and take your time, someone will take that as you’re waiting for them to cut you up, tailgate or generally be a ****.

    bigyinn
    Free Member

    @ OP.
    Thank you!
    I have 3 people just pull out on me on the school run this morning, which makes me think there was some sort of cloaking device was engaged (its a bright blue renault scenic FFS). Sent me into a bit of a rage, such that the other half start giving me grief for being angry!

    I stopped somewhere yesterday and this bloke get out of his car “wanna move your car, I’ve got a dog to get out the back?”. No please, thank you or kiss my arse. My reply? “Seeing as you asked so nicely yes I’ll move” then im given veiled threats of physical violence. FFS

    I think I should live in the middle of a field miles from anyone else. People = Hell.

    PimpmasterJazz
    Free Member

    I got hit head on by a gent exiting a blind bend on the wrong side of the road several years back.

    My tolerance for people cutting corners into oncoming traffic is very limited. That tends to be my horn-happy time.

    However, living on the Isle of Wight I do have to remember that it’s full of people that drive like my beloved Grandpa did – he was the kind of driver that was never in a crash, but saw several in his rear view mirror. As the OH reminded me too – I slow down when being tailgated which, was she pointed out, is a very good reason not to get too close when in a hurry.

    Here in Italy, horns are used regularly, cars will hoot at cyclists to warn them that there isxa car behind, nothing aggressive

    I think that’s a big cultural difference. I noticed horns being used a lot more on the continent, but there was no apparent malice behind it. In the UK that seems different.

    PimpmasterJazz
    Free Member

    Roll a fat one? It seems to work for some on STW.

    Just not in Austria. 😉

    nickewen
    Free Member

    Aye, some really good points above cheers. For the record, there was no way round him. It’s a weird 1 way system with a curb and bollards to the left in front of the shop (a good thing otherwise the lazy fat shit would probably have driven straight into the shop itself) and another curb to the right and a trolley park.

    Last night’s incident (I think) was a driving standards/selfishness/ignorance thing more than holding me up.. although I couldn’t quite believe I got stuck behind some moron in an otherwise empty car park so maybe that was the ignition.. Anyway, great example for their daughter. Mam shouts/swears at people, Dad shouts/swears at people, Dad does what the **** he likes is his car, Mam never has to walk more than 20ft ever, etc. etc. The audacity of it! And he wasn’t even driving a proper 4×4.. Just a FWD hatchback with a hat on. At least if he was in a Rangey I could have expected it.

    I’ve been toying with the idea of a dashcam.. Might be a good preventative measure in not recording the wiping of my own bonnet with my dial by some nutcase. Or a comedy horn.. Either way I’m going to challenge myself not to use my horn for a while!

    toby1
    Full Member

    Drive a Grey Mini cooper? X4C** In Oakington after just having driven down a road you were allowed on?

    If you did and you shouted at my wife for her sheer audacity to use a bike on the road today then I’d like a word.

    I’m steaming and I wasn’t even there at the time.

    In the car these days I try to be as zen as possible, however, it doesn’t always work.

    Yak
    Full Member

    The older I get, the less I feel the need to antagonise. In your situation I would have reversed and gone out another way. Life’s to short to get involved in petty nothings. Move on.

    DezB
    Free Member

    I’m steaming and I wasn’t even there at the time.

    Know how you feel – when my 13 year old tells me someone’s had a go at him for using a crossing on his bike on his way to school, I just want to destroy them!

    stumpy01
    Full Member

    To be honest, I am exactly the same. I keep thinking I should go to the docs & discuss some kind of ‘talking therapy’ to re-program my brain & how I assess this stuff.

    I am for the most part a calm & relatively competent driver. I know my limits, I know how to drive & try to be considerate to other road users, I don’t leave it to the last minute to swerve across for a slip road, I use my mirrors when joining from a slip road, I indicate, let people out of junctions etc….

    But……I get a real rage on when people do stupid stuff. I do 400 miles/week commuting & see selfish, impatient behaviour on a daily basis.
    People see you coming round a roundabout, you are indicating that you are coming round, they know they should wait but you can just see the ‘meh’ in their eyes as they slowly pull out.

    People who can’t get over to the inside & sit in the obvious queue waiting to leave at the next slip who charge up the outside & squeeze their way in…

    I was following a bloke in the outside of a dual carriageway a while back; it was obvious from the way he was surging (car zooming off, then slowing down repeatedly) that he was debating whether to pull into the inside or keep chancing it and hope to get a gap closer to the slip road. He leaves it way too late & indicated to pull between two cars that are way too close to get in between. Matey boy on the inside closes the gap even further, so now the bloke in front is stuffed…..he’s running out of road before the slip road & has no way of getting across so starts braking to make an emergency swerve….I’d seen this developing so had backed right off, but decided to give him a toot as I went past to try & indicate that his driving was a bit shit & inconsiderate…..he then gesticulated at the car that had prevented him from pulling in, when really it was his impatience that had caused the last minute panic in the first place. As it was, he perhaps gained 3-4 seconds over just pulling over into a decent space further back down the road.

    The thing is – most of this stuff doesn’t really affect me. Chances are I see it coming and have already reacted to it. I know in my head that I can’t control other people’s action & that people are going to be morons but I can’t help getting annoyed by it.
    I want to stop them & have a rational chat with them to see if they are even aware that their driving is crap & inconsiderate to others.

    My Dad used to be a black cabbie in London & just tells me to chill out & relax. I’d really love to be able to, but telling me to chill & relax is the same as telling someone who’s scared of flying to just chill & relax or someone who hates spiders to just chill out & relax when they see one…..

    Anyway – I’ve gone on a bit. Time for my Weetabix.

    thenorthwind
    Full Member

    I have a little electronic keyring thing that plays a selection of random soundbites from Fawlty Towers on a crappy little speaker – “Right, well don’t say I didn’t warn !” “Please try to understand before one of us dies” etc. God knows where I got it from, but I put it in the centre console years ago and when I get angry behind the wheel (which is surprisingly often given my otherwise calm demeanour) I press it and laugh and feel calmer.

    stumpy01
    Full Member

    thenorthwind – Member

    I have a little electronic keyring thing that plays a selection of random soundbites from Fawlty Towers on a crappy little speaker – “Right, well don’t say I didn’t warn !” “Please try to understand before one of us dies” etc. God knows where I got it from, but I put it in the centre console years ago and when I get angry behind the wheel (which is surprisingly often given my otherwise calm demeanour) I press it and laugh and feel calmer.

    Funnily enough – you used to be able to get a Homer Simpson one of those that I kept meaning to buy that sticks on the dashboard and says something every time you whack it.

    gummikuh
    Full Member

    I think the only time I ever see my wife get angry, is when an oncoming vehicle overtakes a cyclist and thus forcing her to take evasive action, she is the most careful and considerate driver and I wish I shared her outlook. When I am a passenger I feel myself thinking “don’t let that idiot in, he is pushing you out of the way” and she always lets them in and smiles.
    It is very dodgy to get involved with other motorists physically and I think a previous response suggested looking at other areas of your life, as often they all seem to come to a head when we get behind the wheel.
    As a cyclist, I often find myself shaking my head when wronged, but I know I am so vulnerable on a bicycle that its just not worth it.

    DezB
    Free Member

    Apart from the Weetabix, I could have written your previous post stumpy01!

    I had a woman do the late cut across me onto the slip road last week, I glanced across just as a van then switched from the right sliproad lane to the left lane right in front of her (van had no way of knowing she’s just arrived there). She gestures and shouts at the van! Made me laugh, but it just shows these **** have no idea what they’re doing wrong.

    Flaperon
    Full Member

    Too much of a boring motorist to sound the horn out of anger. I do try, occasionally, but usually end up washing the rear window instead.

    If I see someone chatting away on their phone on the motorway they’ll tend to get a long blast as I get alongside. Occasionally if an HGV flicks their indicator on while I’m next to them with someone in lane 3 it’ll get used for what it’s designed for.

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