Hi

Simple question

Ive been struggling to get comfy on my dark side bike

What size stem do you use and what are your vital stats and frame size?

I'll report back on mine when I can find a ruler

Cheers

Height 5' 11"
Frame m/l Giant 53.5
Top tube 565mm
Stem 100mm -6 deg.

Height – 5' 10.5"
Frame – Enigma
Top tube – 568mm
Stem – 120mm -6 deg

i feel you're not going to get any worthwhile answers by looking at other peoples stats, your best bet is to go to a road bike shop that knows their stuff and get them to look at your position as it could have nothing at all to do with your stem length.
or as you're using the phrase "dark side" i'm going to assume that you're new to road riding and just need to get used to it and/or do some stretching

Height – 5'9.5"
Frame – Trek Madone SL 56cm
Top tube – 560mm
Stem – 90mm -6 degree.

Just to prove Jo's point, there's three people of a reasonably similar height and we've all got rather different set ups! To be honest mine's probably a bit short, been meaning to stick a 100mm stem on for a while, but it's extremely comfortable. Don't fix what isn't broken and all that…

Aren't you expecting a bit much? To be comfortable on a road bike?

( Oh: 😉 just in case anyone gets all upset)

i had a fitting and the guy reccomended a shorter stem, and losing a couple of spacers – made so much difference. no spend 50% of the time in the drops wheras before it was 10%.

get some proper advice whilst you are on the bike – not the internet – we really have nothing to offer but somer numbers. Height obviusly plays a part but more so the ratio of torso: arm: height and you flexability.