Attributed to Chuck Norris.

“Men are like steel. When they lose their temper, they lose their worth.”

I’m no expert on Chucks sayings, so if you know otherwise do feel free to correct me in a non-judgemental way.

I am a berserker, my father was a berserker, my grandfather was a berserker and my great grandfather was a berserker, I come from a long line of berserker’s!

PS. Chuck would be better sticking to profanity than trying to be profound.

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4E08zeCqjo[/video]

everything Chuck Norris says is Quote of the day, year and of all time.

Men are like mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Men are like parking spaces, The good ones are already taken and what’s left is handicapped.
Men are like rain. You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get, or how long it’ll last.

Girlfriends are like buses. The best ones are bendy.

And it’s rare to find one that’ll happily let you in the back door.

“The problem with internet quotes is that their accuracy can’t be trusted” – Winston Churchill

Don’t complain abiut the results you didn’t get with the work you didn’t do.

I believe virtually everything I read, and I think that is what makes me more of a selective human than someone who doesn’t believe anything.

David St. Hubbins

“The problem with internet quotes is that their accuracy can’t be trusted” – Winston Churchill

😀

Yeah that wasn’t Churchill though, it was Shakespeare.

“If you keep messing with that spot you’ll get impetigo.” Mrs Rockitman 15/05/12

I left the spot alone.

There must be a few good George W Bush ones, however I like him trying to repeat the saying, “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice eerrmmmmm????”

The problem with coming out with quotes like:

Men are like mascara. They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Men are like parking spaces, The good ones are already taken and what’s left is handicapped.
Men are like rain. You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get, or how long it’ll last.

Girlfriends are like buses. The best ones are bendy.

And it’s rare to find one that’ll happily let you in the back door.

Is everyone just marks you down as one of life’s losers making excuses.

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.” Herm Albrig

Despite the ever rising cost of living it remains as popular as ever.

.

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
Ernest Hemingway

“She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.” – Dorothy Parker (on Katherine Hepburn).

“If you’re not pissing off half the people, then you’re not trying hard enough”

Yvon Chouinard, CEO Patagonia

you’re wrong and you’re a grotesquely ugly freak

Chris Morris on the opening skit for the Animals episode of Brass Eye

you could more money auctioning dogs if you were twice as ugly as you are; and you are very ugly indeed

Chris Morris on the day today. Though I can’t remember which episode