Viewing 11 posts - 1 through 11 (of 11 total)
  • Political Joke
  • tankslapper
    Free Member

    THIS IS A NONPARTISAN JOKE THAT CAN BE ENJOYED BY BOTH PARTIES!
    NOT ONLY is that it it’s also POLITICALLY CORRECT!!

    While walking down the street one day an MP is tragically hit
    by a truck and dies.

    His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

    "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

    No problem, just let me in," says the man.

    "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

    "Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the MP.

    "I'm sorry, but we have our rules” And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds him self in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a club house and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such A good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go.

    Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises…The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit heaven”

    "So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. "Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity. "The senator reflects for a minute, then he answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.

    "So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

    Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above.

    The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?

    "The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning……

    Today you voted."

    iDave
    Free Member

    that's good for you TS

    zokes
    Free Member

    I like!

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middlin...
    Latest Singletrack Videos
    ernie_lynch
    Free Member

    How come St Peter at first says "we're not sure what to do with you" and then straight away says "I'm sorry, but we have our rules"

    Eh ? ……..explain that Slapper.

    …..sounds to me like your joke needs a bit of tidying up mate.

    Karinofnine
    Full Member

    Good one

    molgrips
    Free Member

    Plus the guy goes from being an MP to being a senator. Get it right!

    tazzymtb
    Full Member

    The Labour party have decided to change their party logo from a rose, to a condom because they feel it more accurately reflects their policies. This is because a condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks and gives you a good sense of security whilst you're being f**ked.

    …. the Conservatives have also decided to change their logo to a condom, but one with a pin through it. This symbolises all the same attributes as the new Labour logo with the exception that it doesn't actually work.

    project
    Free Member

    Thought it was going to be about camerooooooon,but the best joke will be when he FAILS dismally to win the election.

    BigBikeBash
    Free Member

    Does this mean i can post all the bl00dy email jokes I get?

    Still, this one raised a smile

    MrWoppit
    Free Member

    I thought it was going quite well until "His soul arrives in heaven "…

    tankslapper
    Free Member

    😆

Viewing 11 posts - 1 through 11 (of 11 total)

The topic ‘Political Joke’ is closed to new replies.