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Pointless questions sales staff ask you when shopping.
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Posted 1 year ago #
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In a Canadian Subway I visited recently they were doing a promotion on BLT subs.
What bread did I want? White please.
What did I want in it? Bacon please.
What did I want with it? Er, lettuce and tomato please.
Apparently I could have had a BLT made with tuna, coleslaw and avocado if I wanted, it would still have been a BLT to them.
And don't me started on ordering a coffee in Starbucks - more questions than the census form.Posted 1 year ago # -
OH works in a bike shop...came home the other day with this tale..
Customer... "my back tire keeps going flat, whats wrong with it"
OH....."sounds like a puncture, but could be the valve, how long does it stay up"..
Customer... "i pump it up a few times a week, how can i fix it".
OH... "you can either book it in and we check / fix as required, otherwise you could check the valve is not leaking, fix the puncture or just replace the tube, if your unsure id dont want us to fix it your best bet is to just replace the tube".
Customer... "you would say that your a bike shop and just want to sell me stuff".Customer then leaves...
Bike shop in free advice and offer to fix shocker..
The customer is always right but also cheeky / misguided and about to buy online..
Posted 1 year ago # -
Kevevs - Member
the worst one is when the store is doing a postcode survey for a week or 2 to find out their catchment area.Local Wickes where doing that , gave them the postcode of the local prison, and said i was out on day release, and where did they sell hacksaw blades.
WH SMITHS today, buying new SINGLETRACK MAG, did i want any chocolate, and a bag, seems as if its shameful to be seen carrying a Singletrack in public.
Posted 1 year ago # -
As someone who frequently has bad hearing, pointless questions can be frustrating.
Recently when my hearing was particularly bad (couldn't hear wife when she shouts in my ear), I went out to buy said wife some unsalted butter and milk. Easy.
Got to counter, ready to hand over money and leave...and the lady proceded to wave a few leaflets and say something to me. I gave my usual response "sorry I'm deaf" (don't know why I insist on apologizing for it all the time). She decided to wave a few more leaflets and talk at me some more.
After trying to explain that I'm deaf a few more times, and politely saying "can I just pay for these and go please?", that got a glare and a frown. Then shook her head at the next customer in a kind of, 'deaf people, why can't they just stay at home' way.
Posted 1 year ago # -
ohnohesback - Member
I get annoyed by robotic staff asking me if I have a loyalty card. I find a curt "I neither have nor want one" works well.
Maybe I'm just having a bit of ginger moment but I'm struggling to figure out in what way that 'works'.
Posted 1 year ago # -
You should engage them in converstaion - a Staples Loyalty card, wow, and what colour does it come in, really, wow, like awesome dude (really works when you're in your 50's that one, you really see their respect for your like totally AWESOME street cred light up their faces or something), so wharere was I oh, yes, the air miles card, how many airmiles do i get on a 75p bottle of own brand tippex, what, not airmiles, really? are you sure, it looks like an airmiles card, what with being plastic and everything, is that thermoplastic, looks like it might be, do you think I could melt it down and make it into an air miles card, so anyway..
Posted 1 year ago # -
.......did i want any chocolate, and a bag, seems as if its shameful to be seen carrying a Singletrack in public.
Cheeky git......did you make a formal complaint ? The only way to put a stop to that sort of nonsense is to ask to speak to their supervisor.
"Anything for the weekend sir ?" always gets me. The desire to have slightly shorter hair is the sole motivating factor behind me entering their establishment, and yet they take it upon themselves to ask prying questions about my sexual ambitions during the weekend. It's not right.
Posted 1 year ago # -
"Anything for the weekend sir ?"
I was asked that after my last haircut so I said yes please....the barber lent me his fishing rod
IGMC
Posted 1 year ago # -
"Anything for the weekend sir ?"
Just tell them that you're flattered but you think it would be better if you could just be friends
Posted 1 year ago # -
Earlier Today (im not making this up)
Went to Instore to buy mrs cloudnine some cheap gardening gloves and behind the counter is a large stack of toilet rolls..
Assistant.. 'Would you like some toilet roll to go with that??'
Me.. errrr 'Toilet roll to go with my gloves?'
Assistant.. 'Yes..'
Me.. [looks at gloves and looks pensively at assistant].. 'Do you sell any laxatives??' I cant see any other scenario today that would require toilet rolls to go with these gloves.
Assistant... 'Forget it you sicko'I mean really.
I then walked next door into argos to buy a small garden gazebo as i wanna do some dusty woodwork outside and its been threatening to drizzle.
Assistant. 'Oh.. the one you want is actually on special offer.. you should really think about buying two of these.'
Me.. 'Errr... why would i need two 3m square gazebos?'
Assistant... 'Look how you could be saving!!'
Me.. 'errr... by buying two instead of the one that i came in for?'
Assistant... 'Yes.. and if you took out a store card it would...
Me..[interupting her].. 'I'm quite short of time. If it came with some free sex toys aswell i would go for it.'
Assistant.. [Goes bright red and just takes my card].. 'Thanks.. just the one gazebo.'Posted 1 year ago # -
Local Wickes where doing that , gave them the postcode of the local prison, and said i was out on day release, and where did they sell hacksaw blades.
Well........you thought of saying that.........after the event
At the time you actually gave them your postcode
Posted 1 year ago # -
I went to Maindy leisure centre in Cardiff to use the splendid outdoor cycling track. I was dressed in full lycra, cycling helmet, track mitts, full on biking shades, looking like a taller fatter older Mark Cavendish. I went to the counter, thinking it was obvious why I was there. After a second she said 'Swim, is it?'
I don't mind shop assistants trying to 'up-sell' (as it's called in the trade). As mentioned above, it does work. They aren't to know that you are super-humanly clever and resistant to their guile.
Perhaps you should have a T-shirt made with 'I am TandemJeremy' written on it.
Posted 1 year ago # -
a T-shirt made with 'I am TandemJeremy' written on it
bloke told me a story that it was his birthday and he was going to the pub with his mates. One of them turned up to pick him up and gave him a t-shirt saying "I am Alan Smith" (or whatever his name was) to wear.
He put it on and got to the pub to find 50 people in their wearing t-shirts saying "Alan Smith is a w*nker".
I'm just wonderign what the 'reaction' slogan to an "I am TandemJeremy" t-shirt is;
"Well, I won't try my tried and tested sales guile on you then"
"The branding in this shop is pointless!"
"You'll know your rights, then"Posted 1 year ago # -
Ironically, TJ has become a brand.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Posted 1 year ago #
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"Do you want ketchup with that?"
"What... in my milkshake???"
Posted 1 year ago # -
"Can I help you" - in your face annoyance when you clearly want to just look
Completely ignoring you when you really do want to talk detail with someone...
Posted 1 year ago # -
MF - it is!
You know what to do...
Posted 1 year ago # -
You know what to do...
Posted 1 year ago #
Topic Closed
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