I just cut my fingertip pretty deep whilst slicing bagels like a pro. Where do I go to buy steri strips? Really don't fancy trekking out to hospital for something so trivial but it is bleeding fairly enthusiastically…

sellotape and htfu.

htfu?

Some keyboard wipes might help clean up the blood you leaked whilst typing

Just a flesh wound.

Superglue. Orignally invented as a field dressing.

what pook said, just be careful not to glue your finger to your head.

htfu?

Heal The F*** Up?

Harden, but close enough

the mere fact you were slicing bagels as opposed to crusty rolls indicates a certain 'girliness' to this whole episode. Are you sure you shouldn't lie down in case you feel faint?

superglue can act as a skin irritant on some people, and isn't advised for healing deep wounds.

Dermabond uses a longer carbon chance cyano-acrylate and is safe for gluing yourself back together.

Just a flesh wound.

Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You yellow
bastards! Come back here and take what's coming to you.
I'll bite your legs off!

Genius!

HTFU = Human the FU (non sexist version)

are you a wo/man or a mouse ?

[edit] to avoid specism I should emphasise that mice can be very brave

IIRC superglue (as we have it now) causes necrosis and poor healing, it would be an emergency solution IMO. Personally I'd just gaffer it.

another vote for superglue

A real man would unwind a piece of wire from a brake cable, sew up the finger with the wire, bite off the surplus bit of wire, and then immerse the finger in boiling water to sterilise it. 🙂

(Please only try this if you're a real man)