Viewing 25 posts - 1 through 25 (of 25 total)
  • nun convents
  • bwaarp
    Free Member

    My missus is staying in one for a bit at uni as the rooms are dirt cheap.

    Any tips by past thieves on how to enter buildings without being noticed would be greatly appreciated. Should I stake the place out and start noting down exactly what the nuns do, when they go to bed, what time they get up at, what they eat etc? 😀

    Junkyard
    Free Member

    Dress up as one and sneak in
    Job done

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    dress up as satan and just stroll in

    alfabus
    Free Member

    See this instructional video

    HTH
    Dave

    jon1973
    Free Member

    BigButSlimmerBloke
    Free Member

    stick on beard, wig, long white dress, call yourself jesus, tell them you’re there to see your dad – you’re in.

    BigButSlimmerBloke
    Free Member

    ..or hire a nun outfit and stroll in

    go on, you know you want to

    Klunk
    Free Member

    the trick is to walk in as if you own the place.

    kimbers
    Full Member

    Klunk – Member

    the trick is to walk in as if you own the place.

    kind of like god

    i hope you have primed your missus v=by getting her to watch doccumentaries about nuns

    nuns on the run
    sister act
    behind convent walls
    and my favourite; the devils

    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9DFfrH-018[/video]

    McHamish
    Free Member

    If you do manage to get in take some web cams with you and start up your own internet business.

    McHamish
    Free Member

    i hope you have primed your missus v=by getting her to watch doccumentaries about nuns

    There are other nun films to watch…I now know what sort of things go on in the communal showers.

    TuckerUK
    Free Member

    I rode past one once and heard one nun say to another “Where’s the candle?”

    The other replied “Yes is does rather doesn’t it”

    McHamish
    Free Member

    There you go, you’ve even been provided with a conversation opener.

    druidh
    Free Member

    I get it. It’s ok to take the piss because it’s only Christianity.

    I’ve not reported it to the mods this time – just don’t make a habit of it.

    Ambrose
    Full Member

    We’ll have none of this innuendo here thank you very much!

    LabWormy
    Full Member

    Be very careful, they move around silently on castors under their habits.

    Very disturbing to find one standing just behind you whilst “visiting”!

    coolhandluke
    Free Member

    Go in dressed as a priest, I bet the nuns will welcome you with open ***s.

    johnners
    Free Member

    Disguise yourself as a German paratrooper.

    ourmaninthenorth
    Full Member

    What’s the difference between a nun convent and a convent (out of interest)?

    I wonder what the country would have looked like if Henry hadn’t got his own way….

    CaptainFlashheart
    Free Member

    The seven dwarfs were in a Catholic church. They were sitting near the rear and as the priest was speaking, they whispered and giggled amongst
    themselves, causing quite a disturbance.

    All of a sudden, Dopey stands up and says, “Father, are there any midget nuns in the church ?” “No,” said the priest, “There are no midget nuns in the church.”

    A little time passed and the dwarfs were again whispering and giggling amongst themselves causing quite a disturbance and noticeably angering the priest.

    Soon, Dopey stands up again and asks, “Father, are there any midget nuns in the city?”

    “No, my son, there are no midget nuns in the city or in the church.” says the priest. Again the dwarfs resume their annoying giggling to the dismay of the priest.

    Once again, Dopey stands up and asks “Father, are there any midget nuns in the state?”

    “No, my son, there are no midget nuns in the state, in the city, and no
    midget nuns in the church.” exclaimed the priest, obviously upset.

    The dwarfs continue their interference.

    Dopey stands up and asks, “Father, are there any midget nuns in the country?”

    The priest, totally angered, exclaims “No, my son, there are no midget nuns in the church, in the city, in the state, no midget nuns in the country, there are no midget nuns in the whole world!!! Now sit down!!!!!”

    Soon afterwards, a chant can be heard from the rear of the church, “Dopey f***ed a penguin. Dopey f***ed a penguin. Dopey f***ed a penguin.”

    solarpowered
    Free Member

    Ok Bwaarp here goes – I near enough grew up in a convent and (of course) I love the men people!
    Plan:
    1: give your girl time (if you can ) to figure out ‘when’ the quiet times are. This usually takes a few days.
    2: once you have times, you need a route! Theres no point in just chosing the obvious …. There will be other girls out there without such loveliness and thus wish to spoil your ‘stay over’. Chose a ‘clever’ route and tell the wife to trust NO-ONE!
    3: once you’re in, you need to have a ‘get out plan ‘ organised. A handy hint would be that nuns generally believe all is surrounded by pink and fluffiness along with joy and gayness…… BE that person, FEEL the joy and gayness, YOU ARE the pink and fluffiness!!!!

    And lastly good luck! And p.s…… She’s at uni presumably trying to learn something. Don’t f*** it up with lots of distractions 😉

    hertz32
    Free Member

    We’ll have none of this innuendo here thank you very much!

    In-Your-end-o 😀

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kD-fPb87mVA[/video]

    labsey
    Free Member

    Tell them you’re in witness protection. I think that’s how it worked in Sister Act.

    althepal
    Full Member

    ?? Intrigued at Solarpowered??
    Sounds similar to sneaking into the QMU halls many, many years ago!

Viewing 25 posts - 1 through 25 (of 25 total)

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