And the one that made me cry - whilst talking to our 3 year old I asked her what her favourite colour was, her answer "The colour of your eyes Daddy". Bless.
this thread has made great reading, all sorts of comments and thoughts here. So I gotta add something! I'm 43, never wanted kids until I met the wife (spent my life partying!) and even then was unsure (like SFB if I remember rightly)
Now have 2 kids, aged 1 & 2 years and one of each. Don't want more. But they are the best thing ever, and, you will only truly understand the joy (and yes stress, lack of sleep and frustration) they bring once you have them. I am now healthier than I ever was (less partying more biking) I'm not saying have / don't have kids, it's all down to choice but maybe don't be so keen to say "I'm not having any" until you are too old to anyway
Plus only reason anything living thing exists is to reproduce to ensure its contuinued existence anyway.
Im not so pious to suggest everyone would benefit in becoming a parent, (there are people out the who should NEVER be allowed to reproduce, but thats for another thread.), but at least we as parents can say with conviction whether we like it or not!
Its not for everyone i admit, my parenting days didnt start until i was 34, so i'd had time to do the selfish things (and rather enjoyed it thank you), but felt my existence lacked, erm i dunno, focus i guess.
bonj - MemberPlus only reason anything living thing exists is to reproduce to ensure its contuinued existence anyway.
don't get this at all. Says who?
aah ... someone has mentioned my pet hate! Why is it that as a woman whenever anyone brings a baby into the office I'm supposed to join everyone else cooing and clucking over it! Why does everyone do that? (or expect everyone to be interested in their new baby photo that they e-mail round!)
I'm not interested, I think baby's are really quite unattractive, and I'm find it rather annoying that there is a very definate expectation that I'm supposed to coo! I happen to really like dogs, but I don't expect everyone to coo over photo's of a new puppy, and I certain;y wouldn't e-mail said pic's round the entire office (even though puppy's are way cuter than babies!)
There is a culture of 'children are wonderful' that you are expected to comply with, and it's often frowned upon to say 'actually I don't have children becuase I really don't like them'.
bonj - MemberPlus only reason anything living thing exists is to reproduce to ensure its contuinued existence anyway.
don't get this at all. Says who?
In so much as there is any purpose in our existence then furthering the species and breeding to fill our food supply is about it.
Says Richard Dawkins.
Google 'the selfish gene'
Puppies are cuter than babies
and a kitten playing with wool beats the puppy.
where does a penguin falling into a lake come?
what about Meercats
for the record I always hated the kids on "Youve ben framed" until I had one...
but the Dog clip always wins
oh and I always coo over puppy pictures but if the baby picture isnt of mine, I kind of pretend to be interested
There is a culture of 'children are wonderful' that you are expected to comply with, and it's often frowned upon to say 'actually I don't have children becuase I really don't like them'.
isn't it really (some) people are wonderful, and children are a kind of people ? Perhaps children are more unpredicatable and unruly - thank heavens, so not liking them to me at least implies a craving for predictability and dullness
I don't expect everyone to coo over photo's of a new puppy
Up your expectations a bit.
I am female,39 and have no children. I wanted them when I was younger but it just hasn't happened. Not a decision I made, circumstances decided for me. Wasted my twenties with a loser and spent the majority of my thirties single. Decided that as I was over thirty I was too old to give birth and announced I didn't want any. Cue disbelief and astonishment from friends and work mates. Especially those with little ones. Circumstances have changed again and I find myself with a lovely fella who would love to be a dad but thinks it's too late! 
Erm, biology?
Other sciences are available....
Read the sentence again, think about how it applies to this discussion. The inference is that the only useful thing you can do is breed. That may be true for you, but it isn't for me 
Im not having kids.I hated being a child, pretty much every day and made up my mind that it would be selfish to inflict that on another generation. This has probably had an effect on my relationship status (ie non existant). Some of its down to money, lifestyle, job security , difficult parents, but its not just me, my brother is the same, although he has had girlfriends. My sister had twins and they drove her mad for the first year and she ended up in therapy. Its better now they are 8 year olds as at least you can hold a conversation with them.
I dont see the problem with not having children.
You get to do what you want , when you want, and not have to worry about school choices , stroppy teenage angst, drugs, sex , violence, knife crime , alcohol abuse, whos bullying who in the playground, what colour trainers are in this month etc taking kids away on holiday and they wont want to go, like little miss sunshine.
I had a fantastic childhood, which consisted largely of running around in the hills and woods, Wordsworth stylee, with my dog. I'd want to be able to guarantee something similar for any children of my own... but I live a pretty frugal life, and I'm bludy self-indulgent with my own time & interests. I'm not saying that precludes either a stable relationship or a decent environment inwhich to bring up kids (as others have demonstrated), but I'm - very - wary of imposing my own choices on others.
Mind you, I'm also pretty ugly. 
My riding pal has a 60K Merc & a 650K house, a lovely missus as well. No kids, he's 42 & his next step may be a black lab.
Work it out.
his next step may be a black lab
Yeah, I think this may be my "child-substitute" plan.
a dog is a substitute child like a dinky toy is a substitute bike 
Plus only reason anything living thing exists is to reproduce to ensure its contuinued existence anyway.don't get this at all. Says who?
Erm, biology?
Biology governs HOW we exist. It has no place in determining WHY.
I think baby's are really quite unattractive, and I'm find it rather annoying that there is a very definate expectation that I'm supposed to coo! I happen to really like dogs
the one thing i can say for having children in this case is that there comes a point where you no longer have to pick up their shit and spoon stinking meat out of a can....
and spoon stinking meat out of a can....
you sure it was a real baby and not a small vampire ?
The inference is that the only useful thing you can do is breed
That's being slightly obtuse in that the wrongness stems from the same premise, in that breeding isn't any LESS useful than anything else we do, but it isn't necessarily MORE useful either.
I'm wondering if the ones foreswearing parenthood are grateful their parents made a different choice or resentful of the burden of life ?
I'm very grateful my parents made a different choice 
but then again whilst having no current desire to have kids, people change, we're fickle like that. For a chap who likes things unpredictable sfb, you spend a lot of posts trying to label people 
you spend a lot of posts trying to label people
I wasn't labelling anyone, I was asking a question. I'm quite neutral about the matter, parenthood is voluntary and I endorse that Exactly which labels do you think I've applied and where ?
I would suggest that I reject categorising people in all circumtances and you are as wrong as can be about the matter!
People who don't like children implies..... I endeavour to label you as. For the record I love spending time with my neices and nephews for the exact reasons you point out, but you asked for an example.
People who don't like children implies...
I would call that deduction, not labelling. Since children are highly varied from awful to wonderful, someone saying they don't like children is really something about themselves rather than the children
You call it that then, and I'll stick to my own deductions.
The thread seems to be degenerating a little, but getting back to the point/question.
Not having children is the only thing I truly regret(44).
...whilst having no current desire to have kids, people change, we're fickle like that.
Common theme on this thread is folk (on both sides) saying that those who don't want kids now, may change their mind later; while a few determined souls seem to say that the very suggestion that they might possibly succumb to billions of years of genetic programming is incredibly offensive.
I suspect that whatever path people take, there are some reasons to be jealous of those on the other.
yes no plans on ever having children/have never wanted to have children.
Each to their own IMO. I dont resent my son for me getting out on the bike less, but it doesnt mean i miss it, but im not jealous of those who dont have kids, anymore than im jealous of those who own Ibis Mojo's.
My reference to biology was to demonstrate from a biological point of view that that is why we exist. Obviously we have free will and are therfore able to make our own choices.
I woke up about 5am with a sudden realisation - why is it OK to say you don't like children but not to say you don't like black people? It's just raw prejudice. If you don't want to have any that's fine, it's your choice, but if you dislike children themselves please keep your thoughts to yourself!
It doesn't even make any sense - I've never been gay or black or un-british, but I have clear memories of being a child (and I had equal lack of choice about the matter). I'll admit there are things about myself as a child I dislike - I was selfish, violent and bad tempered, but to some extent I have grown out of those things - and there's no way to get here without being there first.
It is not raw prejudice at all in the same way as racism SFB.
What's the point to this, really? I've got four kids (two grown up and two tiny ones that we adopted four years ago - up yours madonna!). I love them all dearly, but dont expect anyone else to, or for that matter, to have or expect an opinion from. It's about personal choice at the end of the day, and just because I chose to have kids, that doesnt make me any better than someone who doesnt want children, or them any worse.
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