On my commute, had a Swan ambush me from the side of a path, hit me full on in the chest, they can pack quite a punch, I can tell you, well it had me off my bike, then proceeded to try and peck my eyes out today and I thought Swans were gentle graceful things, this one must have been on LSD 😉

Can I claim damages of her Majesty, do you think she might be a tad busy this weekend to take my call?

how’s the bike?

you are lucky it didn’t break your arm

They can chop a mini in half, you know.

swans are violent big fookers – make no mistake i saw one square upto a pitbull on a canal toe path and the dog ran shit scared of it – it was hissing like a venemous snake – it scared me too 😆

horrible things – death to swans

Bike is fine, but not talking to me for obvious reasons 😉

After falling off, I noticed a nest the other side of the canal with what I presume is its Mrs sitting on eggs, so it might just be a moody dad which I can understand in a way.

B/H weekend therefore BBQ it

Yip. Protecting their young. Had one attack me on a tow path – pecked my chain set 🙂

One went for me the other day on the way hone from work. Proper hissing and trying to peck me. Used me bike as a shield and waited until they had gone because he wad not letting me past, had his wife and three chick with him so was obviously protecting his family. Surprisingly vicious creatures.

Some swans belong to the queen some to the dyers and viners or something like that.
There’s a notch on the beak that decideds who you’ve to sue.

swans are violent big fookers- make no mistake i saw one square upto a pitbull on a canal toe path and the dog ran shit scared of it

+1

My stupid spaniel decided he would swim in the river towards a swan and young, swan turned on the dog, first time I’ve seen a dog do front crawl to get out of the water, damn thing was nearly hydro-planing in panic. Never did it again.

Go pick it up by the neck and see where the notch is on it’s beak and sue it’s owner. 😉

There were a few families of geese with chicks on a towpath in Marple last week. It was terrifying, no where to go but forwards with about 8 huge geese hissing at me as a zig zagged through them. I hate geese! But I love ducks 🙂 swans are ok.

A fully grown goose weighs about 10lbs a fully grown swan about 20. What do you weigh?. Grow some balls and give them a kick FFS.

Horrible things swans. Right angry little fekkers. At least the rest of the wildlife makes an effort to blend in to the countryside but no, not swans, they’re white they’re hard and if they don’t break your arm the queen will.

Was it a gay, Muslim swan? That’d explain it.

Golden and Diamond Jubilees are the ONLY times you’re allowed to eat swan as a commoner (in fact it’s almost constitutionally mandatory)

So, crossbow out and off you go

Birds are feathered reptiles.

Vicious things that are very aggressive.

Think of a croc with wings and no teeth.

My stupid spaniel decided he would swim in the river towards a swan and young, swan turned on the dog, first time I’ve seen a dog do front crawl to get out of the water, damn thing was nearly hydro-planing in panic

😀

the When Swans Attack ride by rOcKeTdOgUk, on Flickr

just had one square up to my pup,as he was having a drink out of the lake,pup wern’t happy but didn’t back down,Swan bottled it,although he’d puffed himself up to twice his normal size.
Thing is,if the swan had attacked,the pup would of killed it,which would of been a bit cack really.
So all’s well that end’s well then………..

May have been a CHAV swan out to rob your bike, but then realised it couldnt reach the pedals .

Like it RD 😉

I once saw a swan skin a man and boil him in a pot with vegetables.

Time to get the 4 bore out again.