Ask her it is safe or will it cause carpet burns?

To echo MrsToast:

At least you have somewhere comfortable to pass out after a late night drink induced conversation with huey down the ceramic telephone.

lock yourself in the bog,and have a good old fashioned Dirty Protest

warding off evil spirits, and she had had the house Feng Shooed

Mad cow and to be avoided no matter how “nice” she appears on the outside, if you were genuinely serious about her placing crystals to ward off evil spirits then hand your notice in and tell her to do one out of your life, go for a muddy bike ride as she will most likely be building a voodoo doll out of hair she has pulled from your head whilst you slept.

You need to get out of there – sounds just a little bit odd!!!

Why not see how many of these gleaming white carpets you can ‘accidentally’ drop something on before she decides you are too clumsy to be worth it??

Rachel

ps – if it comes down to a sweepstake, can I have 2 carpets tainted and you’re out??

Suspect there’s dream catchers in the windows, clanking wind chimes in the garden, whale song in the music collection and much unkempt shrubbery. Been there, got the weird ozric tentacle emlazoned t-shirt and tie-dyed curtains.

Pedal quickly away.

Whoa.
Whooooooa.
Just hold on there one darned minute.
Project?
With a girlfriend?
I mean I seen some things in my time, I seen a housefly, I seen a dragon fly, but I ain’t never seen project with a girlfriend!

Any more advice.

I would make lots of, erm, hay and enjoy myself, then make a swift exit.

Also, do you have a pet rabbit?

So asked her about them and she said they where warding off evil spirits, and she had had the house Feng Shooed or something similar.There where also loads of scented candles around the bathroom some lit.And it was broad daylight and no power cut.

Any more advice.

The question everyone is forgetting is, how good is she in the sack?

Nothing wrong with a bit of crazy if she is freaky in the bedroom. IF.

Crystals on the shitter?

She is going to be utterly peerless in the bedchamber.

Been there. An ex was in to reiki and other such mumbo jumbo as well us obsessive cleanliness. Stunningly good looking, went like the privvy door but as crazy as the above pictured carton of amphibians. It was fun whilst it (briefly) lasted.

A feline future smelling of wee definitely beckons.

I have a feeling she may work in our office. Does she have her crystals aligned with the ley lines?

Run very fast indeed.

Euphemism ahoy 😀

Shiny things set by her inlets and outlets….. C’mon people, get with the programme

OP is politely informing us all that….. She’s got a vajazzle (sp)

😛

I’ve got a feeling the next update is going to about the number of cuddly toys in the bedroom ?

I’m sorry but who the **** puts carpet in their toilet / bathroom. That is most disgusting, unhygenic things in the world. Carpet in general is disgusting and unclean, but around a toilet? 😯

Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman.

My house was previously owned by a homosexual, the toilet was carpeted. There is also a perfectly shaped and placed little sink which we eventually twigged could be used as an improvised urinal and a bidet. There’s a “sitzpinkler” sign above the toilet which means my son’s friends pee in the garden, perhaps they haven’t understood what the little sink is for.

The question everyone is forgetting is, how good is she in the sack?

Nothing wrong with a bit of crazy if she is freaky in the bedroom. IF.

This ^

And tbh just sit down, excuse to read anyway 🙂

How has no one asked for pictures of said crazy personnew GF?
Shirley that would dictate how long this should last…
Also may need confirmation of your batting status..is it currently above average?

Great thread BTW 🙂

unkempt shrubbery

😳

“Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman”
My house was previously owned by a homosexual, the toilet was carpeted.

but what gender was the homosexual ?

I think there’s enough information in the rest of my post to work it out, scardypants. I feared any word other than “homosexual” would result in flaming by the politically correct on here.

Rule 1: Never stick your dick in crazy.

Rule 2: Some rules are too much fun to only break once.

We keep coming back to peeing in sinks.

Should I design a widely-acceptable pee-sink-urinal for my 3rd year Major Design Project, is there demand?

Have you found one of these yet?

I think this image may show the answer to one of your current problems but hint at a future one too?

Does she have one of these in the lounge?

If so, that’s 10 seconds you’ve got already, so keep looking.

I’m sorry but who the **** puts carpet in their toilet / bathroom.

My grandparents used to have a carpet on the toilet seat.

edit. They also had something like this to cover the spare toilet roll

This is STW isn’t it? Then how come after 4 pages this has been allowed to go unchallenged;

Thankfully i have vinyl at home.

Vinyl, VINYL, oh my lord, not artisan terracotta tiles, not Alicante marble not even reclaimed Sherwood forest oak treated with free range vegan beeswax but vinyl FFS I bet your bath’s not even real copper is it?

Flounces off in disgust shaking head and muttering vinyl a few more times.

We keep coming back to peeing in sinks.

Should I design a widely-acceptable pee-sink-urinal for my 3rd year Major Design Project, is there demand?

Not really – the present design works fine.

I suppose there’s a reason it’s called “shag” pile…

If you open the back door, how close is the grid? Reachable? Without having to put your shoes on?

If you open the back door, how close is the grid?

fnarrr

she put crystals on the toilet, wtf?
Has she got gorgeous norks and earns double what you do? otherwise I can see no other reason for staying with her. You’re just setting your self up for future troubles. These little niggles become major annoyances after 5 years of marriage. Have some fun and then get gone, you’re wasting your time and hers.