Really glad I didn’t read your post before I cracked on and had a fettle… I went back to the boiler and took the frontage off and followed the wires around to see where they had been linked up.
I was happy with the feed being used so I wired that up and figured the worst that can happen if I wire “4” into “3” was that it wouldn’t control the boiler… so I gave it a shot and hey presto we are in business!
The boiler is from around 96 so has nothing fancy on it for water
I got the nest for £140 posted from someone who had bought it from their supplier and not wanted to install it hence not getting a discounted install!
The house hasn’t melted yet so fingers crossed we are all good!
phew (I hope)