Viewing 27 posts - 1 through 27 (of 27 total)
  • My latest weapon in the fight against cats in the garden
  • WorldClassAccident
    Free Member

    We have a flower bed that three of the neighbours cats use as a sun bed. This involves killing what ever we plant there and rubbing a nice shallow bowl in the dirt to lay in. Clearly they then decide to crap elsewhere in the garden meaning we have to do a cat crap patrol before letting kids play there.

    I have found a way to fight back. I don’t hit the cats but get the fence just behind them. So far I have lost one arrow over the fence but there have been no cats there this morning for the first time in weeks.

    duckman
    Full Member

    I half expected to see a carton of anti-freeze when I opened this up….

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    have you tried the pop bottle full of water in the middle of the garden?

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    philconsequence
    Free Member

    whats a “pop bottle”?

    Gary_M
    Free Member

    You have far too much time on your hands if you can spend time on such mediocrity.

    WorldClassAccident
    Free Member

    No, I am a lovely guy really. I don’t particularly want to hurt the cats but I just don’t like seeing kids covered in cats mess when playing in our garden.

    We don’t have cats, we don’t want dogs and Lion Poo didn’t work.

    Super Soakers were okay but didn’t have the range and accuracy from my office window.

    The arrows have the comedy effect of seeing a sleeping cat jump 3 feet in the air when the arrow hits the fence 12 inches behind them

    Gee-Jay
    Free Member

    What about one of these :-

    I imagine nerf’s are cheaper than arrows

    Torminalis
    Free Member

    Have you tried pissing in the garden? I was advised this when I moved into my new home, the dog has no balls so his doesn’t do the trick. Since I have started doing the midnight sprinkler impression I have had no deposits at all!

    ernie_lynch
    Free Member

    whats a “pop bottle”?

    It’s what the characters in the Beano always had.

    I always wanted a bottle of pop when I was a kid but didn’t know where to get the stuff.

    philconsequence
    Free Member

    torms advice +1squillion

    all the local cats used to use our gravel shelvesgarden as a litter tray, several deposits each night.

    took torms advice and havent had a single cat in there since 😀

    edit – first wee of the morning is usually strongest, i’ve only done it once in the garden and torm helped out once when yeti was attending to his fur in the bathroom. so its not like you need to do it regularly which is a bonus as i wouldnt want to blind my neighbours by letting them see my awesome penis.

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    whats a “pop bottle”?

    ‘pop’ is a fizzy drink and ‘bottle’ is the container in which it comes.

    29erKeith
    Free Member

    I had great success with one of these
    Auto Cat Soaker
    I don’t even need to be in the garden
    Not had one cat in my veggie patch at all since
    Next doors cat had previously decided my veg patch was it’s personal litter tray

    philconsequence
    Free Member

    pop is a fizzy drink eh? so what you really meant was a carbonated libation receptacle?

    you crazy kids and your slang! i’ll never understand you and ting blud.

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    yer mum!

    Milkie
    Free Member

    2L Bottles filled with water, dotted around the garden. It scares them as they do not like the distorted reflection.

    Torminalis
    Free Member

    It scares them as they do not like the distorted reflection.

    WTF? Maybe we should place small prisms all over the garden as the rainbows will haunt their little furry dreams.

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    Pop is similar to mineral, but slighly more lah-di-dah darling. And you don’t get your 5p deposit back for the empty bottle.

    And yes, the weeing in the garden works a treat.

    Or you could get a cat yourself? Keeps the others away and usually craps in someone elses garden.

    hora
    Free Member

    Just do what my Mums elderly Chinese neighbours did. Put poison down with the net result my Mum had two dead cats and a big Vets bill.

    TheSouthernYeti
    Free Member

    I just raked loads of bleach through the gravel drive.

    Seemed to work.

    joolsburger
    Free Member

    Yeah I want one – What is it? linky please….

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    two dead cats and a big Vets bill

    surely one or the other!

    Nick
    Full Member

    Just do what my Mums elderly Chinese neighbours did. Put poison down with the net result my Mum had two dead cats and a big Vets bill.

    Bit extreme but presumably effective at stopping the cats shitting in their garden.

    I had to soak my own cat to get it to stop crapping on the next door neighbours garden, I never thought of offering to pee all over their lawn, not sure why.

    The answer is to have a litter tray and make sure it’s clean, oh, what’s that you say? You can’t be bothered? Well don’t be suprised if someone doesn’t love your pet as much as you do.

    DezB
    Free Member

    I don’t hit the cats

    Try adjusting your aim…

    CharlieMungus
    Free Member

    The answer is to have a litter tray and make sure it’s clean, oh, what’s that you say? You can’t be bothered? Well don’t be suprised if someone doesn’t love your pet as much as you do

    Oooh! This just got interesting. Sit down at the front please!

    Pickers
    Full Member

    Anyone else see The Gadget Show tonight and think of this thread?
    Remote control paintball guns are the way to go!

    headfirst
    Free Member

    and usually craps in someone elses garden.

    Our lazy arse cat has made the flower border beside our drive its toilet, particularly the end near the front door. Why won’t the massively overweight (we got her that way)17 year old eye-irritating fluff maker die?? So our eldest daughter loves her to bits but she’s off to Uni in the not too distant future. The vet told us years ago she’d likely get diabetes but she continues to be in rude health. Harumph! 👿

    CountZero
    Full Member

    I like the bow and arrows. Had a problem last year with several cats from the flats over the back hanging around under my little Acer where the bird feeders are. So I bought a Nerf gun. Great fun, had one moggy levitate when the dart went an inch past it’s nose. Nearly wet myself laughing.

Viewing 27 posts - 1 through 27 (of 27 total)

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