ianyone recommend a stem around 80-90mm that has a stackheight of belw 40mm closer to 30mm would eb ace

and also a standard headset that has a stack height of around 20mm, currently have an orbit xl2 at about 29mm and need alittle more space

ta

For the stem, you won't find a lot shorter than 35mm IIRC when I had this problem – I ended up using a Truvativ XR (model pictured below) which is about 35mm and potentially more importantly assuming you're struggling for steerer length uses a single bolt which means it wont deform at the top if it's not fully covering the steerer.

For the headset, you won't find significantly shorter than the XL2.

http://www.allterraincycles.co.uk/product/103916.html

I've forgotten the precise dims, but I looked at this a while ago. Some FSAs go low also (35mm).

IIRC cane creek and crank brothers are low height headset, not sure how much, look lower than orbit XLII to me though.

Oh there we go crank bros is 21mm.

Head set wise go for Crank Brothers Directset Headset! they come diff modles from XC to DH. so should be one for you type of riding. v low stack height of about 21mm.

CRC has a good selction