Not a drummer, but I’d say practice tapping along with music REALLY accurately. Listen to your own tapping and really concentrate on getting it in time… Hard but fun to do
useful advice – if you know what you’re tapping along to…
most popular music since the 50s has been written in 4/4 time, meaning that the snare drum is played on beats 2 & 4 out of any 4 beat pattern. It’s a fairly high pitched “crack” sound that is probably the easiest drum to pick out & work back from. If you’re right handed, practice tapping along with that with your left hand. Again, the example I linked to will point out the sound of the snare drum.
The bass drum is a dull thud played often on beats 1 & 3, but with more intricate patterns in between. Try tapping your right foot (if you’re right handed) along with that, if you can pick it out. Then put in the cymbals with your right hand – they’re usually easy to pick out, being a high pitched “chick” or “ping” sound (hi-hat or ride)
Another useful tool is a metronome – you can pick up electronic ones from about a tenner, but obviously the more you spend the more flexible they’ll be.
If you ever get to the stage of doing a recording session, the engineer will try & get you to play along to a “click track”, which is a fancy way of saying “metronome”. The earlier you start playing to a metronome or click, the easier it will be… but strangely, molgrips’ advice can also have a positive effect.
For our last session, the engineer asked if I’d ever played to a click track; answer “not much”, so we gave it a try. I have a habit of drumming along to CDs on the steering wheel while I’m driving queueing at traffic lights, which made it so much easier to play to a click track than I expected. We got all the drum tracks for 3 songs done in no more than two separate takes.