Do you have a tapered headtube? QR15 forks? Wide rear end? (apparently 142.5mm is the new 'thing'?? I never knew...) a press fit BB? Oversize bars? 2 or 3 x 10 divetrain? Tubeless tyres? Incredible 'Amazium coated' fork stanchions? Or 101 other recent innovations?
No, me neither.
My bike is apparently some sort of dark-ages relic, and I must upgrade or I'll be at a massive disadvantage.
I say NO! Luddites of the world unite! There IS another way!
I bet you have a short stem and oversize wide bars (700mm+) though!
In my experience, the amount of high technology bling on a bike is inversely proportional to how much it gets ridden
yeah and I bet you have that new fangled rear suspension don't you!
Do you have a tapered headtube? QR15 forks? Wide rear end? (apparently 142.5mm is the new 'thing'?? I never knew...) a press fit BB? Oversize bars? 2 or 3 x 10 divetrain? Tubeless tyres? Incredible 'Amazium coated' fork stanchions? Or 101 other recent innovations?
Nope - I have none of those! (see perfect bike thread!)
I bet you have a short stem and oversize wide bars (700mm+) though!
Oversize only on one bike (Which is nothing new) becasue I came like that. I've been using wide bars since about 1994, but currently settled on 660/640mm for XC and only about 710 on the Pitch. It's enough!! Buck the trend!! Cut them down!! 
Disc brakes?
thanks for this, up until 2 mins ago i thought i was doing ok in the mtb arms race, now i realise i'm years behind - I have none of these either!
Have you still got at least one V brake on board?
You get a bonus point if the lever(s) come from circa 1995.
Oh dear - I'm 25 years behind with my Saracen - not even got indexed gears!
My 1985 Saracen Conquest.
my requirment for a bike is that it should work with minimum attention. My tatty old 2nd hand hardtail fits that bill quite well
8sp - check, 06 forks purchased for £60 - check, 25.4mm bars - check, sub 700mm bars check.
09 frame though so not too far back.
my 1999 sunn bmix is quite retro though!
Well obsolete here.
Gears: 3x9, 3x8, 1x8, 1x1.
Cranks: ht2 xt on 3, and square taper on 4th.
All headtubes are 1.125". Oddly, the oldest one is the semi-integrated one.
I have never even sat on a gravity dropper seatpost.
Forks: 09, 07, 05 and rigid.
Brakes all circa 2006 apart from ancient v brakes.
One bike has an oversize stem/bars, the others all obsolete 25.4mm.
Inner tubes throughout.
It makes my bikes, oooh, 2-3lbs heavier than their new equivalents in terms of price and 'purpose', but also made them and spares for them affordable. Basically if I tried to keep right up to date with latest bikes and technologoes with my disposable income, I would have a crappy commuter plus one xc bike as opposed to fs xc, singlespeeed and freeride bikes I have at the moment. This way works for me.
Have you still got at least one V brake on board?You get a bonus point if the lever(s) come from circa 1995.
Oh yeah. Red Shimano DX Vees with matching red levers, on an 18 year old Kona. Get in!
Dez, discs are old hat now. I'm talking about the REALLY new stuff we all MUST HAVE!
(I suppose tubeless is getting on a bit as well, come to think of it...)
I bought some tapered forks. They were cheaper than the non-tapered ones. What does that tell me? 
Do you have a tapered headtube? QR15 forks? Wide rear end? (apparently 142.5mm is the new 'thing'?? I never knew...) a press fit BB? Oversize bars? 2 or 3 x 10 divetrain? Tubeless tyres? Incredible 'Amazium coated' fork stanchions? Or 101 other recent innovations?
- Tapered headtube but standard fork due to frame warranty replacement from alu to carbon.
- I've got one of those DT Swiss fat QRs on the front (RWS??) but didn't choose it & it's a faff; it's anything but QR.
- wide rear end - nope. Not on the bike anyway.
- Press fit BB - yes, I think. As above because of frame replacement.
- Oversize bars. Yes, do any bikes come with standard bars/stem now? Wanted some wider bars for my Inbred & had to hunt around for standard size wide bars to go with my RF Deus stem.
- Drivetrains are standard, but I notice the 2011 Stumpy gets 2x10 with a SRAM carbon crankset and I am slightly envious of this. Looks nice.
- Tubeless tyres - yes, converted for trip to Spain and reduced puncture stops from ~3/day to zero. So worth it.
The only carbon on my road bike is the fork, i'm quite pleased with that fact.
Mass migration to RetroBike?
I have hydraulic Magura rim brakes on a kona kula, can I join your club please?
Does it count if your bike has gone out of production?
I've got some reasonably up to date kit hanging off a mountain cycle fury frame, but, it's not cutting edge. It's a simple single pivot and it could even be regarded as being slightly agricultural but i love it.
Love is blind.
Zangolin that is quite nice.
Surly 1x1 with 2007 Rebas, only 100mm of travel. 660mm wide bars, 25.4 diameter. 135mm rear end. I am so old hat. Even my XT cranks are 2008...
I only recently made the move to disk brakes and this year splashed out £35 on my first suspension forks - some 6-year-old MC Comps.
I'm still using ISIS bottom brackets (yes, they DO work!), Rockshox Psylo forks (those ones that everyone raved about when they first came out but are apparently now not stiff enough or long enough to cope with the trails) and a 3 x 9 groupset with a 3-generations-old XTR rear mech.
Think my bikes will stay about 2008 - not sur ethe ither stuff has added what previos stuff did. Suspension is better than rigid, disc is better than v brakes but not sure that wide bars, prsee fit BB actually add anything to a bike that you would actually notice.
cromo, 80mm forks, 1.8 tyres, skinny bars,gripshift,04 brakes here 
juiced » cromo, 80mm forks, 1.8 tyres, skinny bars,gritshit,04 brakes here
there fixed it for you
1992 gt outpost as my hardtail with mozo pros and 1997 proflex beast!
Oh no, 660mm wide bars, 90mm stem, 3x9 transmission, QR forks and a shock with only one pro pedal setting on one bike!
I won't mention the 25.4mm bars and 100mm forks on the other one
i've got dual control xtr v brakes and a 80mm fork that no one will service cos they say they won't be able to put it back as the seals have all changed. problem is, to upgrade i'd need new fork, new wheels, new brakes, new gear shifters. new bike basically.
Wide rear end
(Snigger)
There's always one..... 
Oh cack, that means my bike is obsolete too.
I have some white oversize bars, does that count. Mind you I only got White cos they were a tenner.
I think my problem is that I'M obsolete!!
Are these people who change their bike every year to the latest "must have", the ones who have taken advantage of all this easy credit and therefore caused the banks to crash? Its all mountain bikers fault 
Some people must have massive credit card balances in order to keep up with the latest 50 inch travel frames!
'97 Orange P7 with 1" steerer tube, 80mm forks (first year of Z2 bombers, don't you know) and not a disc brake mount in sight
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