Office debate.
Clearly not sensible for a huge number of reasons and NOT considering it so don't start down that one fellow forumites...
But if they aren't dangerous (well, small ones can't be so bad, can they - we're not talking baboons or anything) what can be done?
only if you remember to discipline it correctly
I'll get my coat
A Rockerbilly bloke used to bring a spider monkey into my local boozer about 25 years ago. He was a prick. (the bloke, not the monkey, he seemed alright)
It used to sit on his shoulder while he played pool
Must be legal....David Cameron has one.
i think you can spank one but anything more is just mleh
if it is not legal I'll have to get rid of the wife!
Certainly not, even if it consents.
Wonder if you could teach one to ride a bike?
EDIT: of course you'd have to call it 'Spank'
You need a license (for most monkeys). http://archive.defra.gov.uk/wildlife-pets/wildlife/protect/documents/dwa-animallist.pdf
My brother had a pet monkey in Thailand...well it wasn't his it was his housemates who bought it from a 'food' stall.
It was small and had big eyes apparently.
I still think they should have made it a little jacket and taught it to smoke cigars.
I've got one. here's gerald on his fixie, the little tyke. I send him down the offie when I'm out of beer, he's in the garage lacing a wheel at the mo' GERALD, GO GET ME AN ERDINGER.
Bikemonkey1 by kevinevs, on Flickr
......well, small ones can't be so bad, can they?
The smaller the monkey, the greater its urge to kill you.
Known scientific principle......
If you're not careful he'll steal your girl and send you taunting photos from their holiday...
Why not just get a kid, theyre non productive, break things, make a noise, sometimes theyre seen as cute by their parents,are sick and crap when young, oh and no matter what they do strangers should never ever offer any advice about looking after the little brat.
But the governmnet pays you have a kid.
I had one, but he kept listening to erasure and wearing leather chaps, turns out he was chimp-pansy
I think it should be made illegal not to have one 
jesus. keep that one in the closet Tazzy!
here's mine, he's called Roaul
Years ago when my dad was first going out with my step-mum the house they lived at had a Barbary ape called Judy.
She was great with men but hated women with a passion(would attack any but her owners wife) , she would sit on your lap and pick the salt out of your hair. As a 12 year old boy I thought she was fantastic.
pick the salt out of your hair.
Who has salt in their hair? Are you sure that's not just dandruff?
Who has salt in their hair?
Every single person who sweats !!
Every single person who sweats !!
I must wash too often or something, I've never noticed salt in my hair or anyone elses.
If you had opposable thumbs and a Degree in Phrenology, you'd try to keep it below the radar as well. I'm pickin salt here boss.
I brought up a pet monkey in Thailand when I lived there. She was ace, lived with at my mates restaurant.
Sadly the silly bint had a thing about nicking ciggies, and used to run off and rip them up. One day for whatever reason she decided to steal a customers back and eat them. She died shortly afterwards.
She was my best mate.
I dunno if I should laugh or cry quirrel. That is such a moving tale. are you sure it was a monkey?
Yes.
Brought her up from about a month old until she was 2 1/2 or so.
Here are some photos
See if people can have dogs and cats as pets, then why not little monkeys?
Dunno about over here in the UK, but in places like Thailand, where it's their natural habitat anyway, is it so much of a problem?
aww! It'd nick your ciggies Elf!
What was the monkey called that used to ride GT bikes? I brought an aggressor thanks to his advertising. The bike was rubbish though.
What was the monkey called that used to ride GT bikes?
You mean Hans Rey's Chimp that featured in his video "Monkey see, Mokey do"?
project - Member
Why not just get a kid...
Easier to get rid off a monkey. You've obviously never tried to get a kid put down when you get fed up off it...
That's him mboy! Mr Jinx!
Gerald Durrell writes in one of his books that he was picked up at Paris airport by a chimp on a motorcycle. Gerald got on the bike and the chimp drove him to the zoo.
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