If she was going to book it anyway, why bother asking you first ?
Time to reset this … *
She wasn’t asking your permission. She asked because she wants to know that she thinks you are important and that you think she is important (bare with me)
Does she ever ask you which shoes she should wear? The ones she has on, or the ones in her hand. The ones she has on are the ones she likes – that’s why she has them on. Fact is the shoes will probably be almost exactly the same to a man’s untrained eye, but she wants you to prove to her that you care about the way she looks as much as she does. So the only response should be to ask her to change the shoes so you can see her in the other ones, and then tell her you liked the ones she had on in the first place. It could be shoes. It could be dinner. It could be the sort of soap in the sink.
Basically, we’re all the same and want/need similar things. But we do go about getting those things in different ways.
So when your wife asks if its ok for her to disappear with her friends on NYE to go to a concert, there is only one way to deal with it, something like: well, you know I love NYE and think its an important night for us to be together. But sometimes its also important for us to do things with other people, and the concert sounds like great fun. WIsh I could go with you. So while I am a bit miffed that you want to be somewhere else on NYE, go with my blessings and have a great time, and we can do the together thing the next night.
* This advice comes with a health warning. It could be complete bollocks.