Had a nice night last night, in the accommodation the uni hooked me up with. Felt like being back in first year. Had a lecture at 9am, and I was feeling ok. Towards the end the lecturer hesitated on something and had to stop for a few seconds to work something out, and all the thoughts started coming back. And then I got an email on my phone - the university announcing that there had been a student death. Had to leave the lecture.
Had a meeting with student services & support today. Was pretty horrible, but helpful. A lot of pressure has been lifted in terms of coursework/exams/normal stuff/etc.
Also had to go the police station to give a statement. My friend (who also lives here) went in the day before, and it took him 30 or so minutes for his, and he was the last person to see him alive. I was in there for over an hour. Wasn't nice. Saw his family outside the station before going in. They're being really supportive, and kept telling me how sorry they were. I didn't really know what to say, surely it's worse for them than me? I don't want to make it into a competition, but it feels weird that everyone seems to be worrying about me.
I coached tonight, and none of the other coaches were there so I lost myself in the session, and had a really nice 3 hours or so doing that. Distractions are good.
Friends are great. Some have been really supportive about it, others don't mention it at all. I appreciate both.
The police gave me a copy of his note, not sure if I want to read it again.
I wasn't drinking at the moment anyway, and I'm not going to start. I think I'll go ride a bike tomorrow. I rode Monday (more out of business than pleasure or training) and it felt pretty good. Bloody cold mind.
Thanks for all the kind words and thoughts. I usually avoid threads like this as I either can't think of anything to say that would make any difference or that hasn't been said already. But sometimes stuff that doesn't really make a difference is better than nothing at all, I guess.