My wife recently went for her…. You know…. That smear thingy they do at the doctors these days.

The nurse who was carrying out the procedure, as she put in the… You know… The open, closey thing, commented “Oooh, you have strong muscles, I can tell you haven’t had any children yet” harmless enough I suppose at this point but then ended with ” he’s a lucky chap”.

Now, my wife wasn’t insulted in anyway nor was she cross or offended but she was a bit surprised I think it’s fair to say. We both found it funny when she told me about it but it does seem a really odd thing to say to try and make what is, I would assume, a fairly uncomfortable procedure less so.

Erm…

😕

it does seem a really odd thing to say about one’s wife on a public forum…
😯

think that nurse over stepped the mark a lil bit, might as well have said ‘oh you’ve got a tight fan’e, I bet your husband loves king you, not like me I’ve had 3 kids and a bucket fan’e’

fervouredimage – your user name is somewhat apt in this situation!!

Cheers

Danny B

” he’s a lucky chap”.

Seriously?? That’s a bit* unprofessional.

I’ve also got a thing where if i’m about to mention something to do with mrs P, I ask myself “would I be happy with her reading this”, on the basis she probably does/might.

You might have failed that test!

Anyway, it wouldn’t be very lucky for you if you had an enormous wang, but clearly you don’t so all is well 😉

*a bit=hugely

Does she play Wiff Waff ?

as she put in the… You know…

Fist?

I’ve also go a thing where if i’m about to mention something to do with mrs P, I ask myself “would I be happier with her reading this”, on the basis she probably does/might.

You might have failed that test

Very possibly.

🙄

You might have failed that test

I dunno, better than if the opposite was true?

‘Hello…ooo..ooo..ooo….’

But yeah, Thanks for sharing. 😕

To the OP. You don’t really have a wife do you? There is life outside the front door. Go on, be brave, leave this virtual world.
If you do have a wife I’m sure she will be using those muscles with someone else once she reads this.

Can you put a picture of your wife up please? I’d prefer to know what she looks like before we start discussing the tightness of her foo foo.

If she’s hideous it’ll put me right off my lunch.

*squeezes pelvic floor muscles*

We may as well shut down the internet now.

Vain girl to vain guy during love-making session:

“Tight aren’t I?”

“No, love, just full.”

We may as well shut down the internet now.

I’m pretty sure the internet is well versed in dealing with the subject matter being discussed and, indeed, the images the story evokes.

deadlydarcy – Member
Vain girl to vain guy during love-making session:

“Tight aren’t I?”

“No, love, just strangely full.”

FTFY. 😉

The open, closey thing

Way to reinforce Mrs 16’s prejudices about this fine forum in four simple words. 🙁

Oooh, you have strong muscles, I can tell you haven’t had any children yet” harmless enough I suppose at this point but then ended with ” he’s a lucky chap”.

Could have been worse. Nurse could have shrieked “OMG I’ve lost my watch”. 😯 😉

I dunno, better than if the opposite was true?

The Glaswegian phrase is “Like chucking a sausage down a close” 😉

I think the English one is ‘Waving a stick in the Albert Hall’ 😉

London one is chucking a sausage down Oxford Street.

Or indeed like a sausage in a welly
Or a wizard’s sleeve?

I’d best stop there…

Could have been worse. Nurse could have shrieked “OMG I’ve lost my watch”.

Or…

Wife : “Err thanks, you didn’t need to say that twice”
Nurse : “I didn’t!”

“Happy Husband” stitch?

One thing you haven’t mentioned… Were you aware of your wife’s “talents”?

“Oooh, you have strong muscles, I can tell you haven’t had any children yet..

Obviously someone who’s never heard of pelvic floor exercises or Dr. Kegel. 😉

A clown’s pocket.

Were you aware of your wife’s “talents”?

…..

I’ve just used peterfile’s rule…

But about your wife OP, rather than mine

Were you aware of your wife’s “talents”?

Nothing wrong there, any man would like to have his penis complimented, why would a woman not like to receive a compliment on the tightness of her hole(s)?

Would have been much worse of they had said ” blimey your saggy and a bag of spanners down there, does you husband even touch the sides?”

Nothing wrong there, any man would like to have his penis complimented, why would a woman not like to receive a compliment on the tightness of her hole(s)?

I’m not sure whether I’d want my male doctor to say “well Mr File, I must say, that is a fantastic penis you have, Mrs P is a lucky woman!”

Would be a bit freaked out to be honest and would probably change GP.

I’d give him a big manly bear bug, without putting my willy away.

I’d give him a big manly bear bug, without putting my willy away.

That’s one for the bank.

male doctor to say “well Mr FileHora, I must say, that is a fantastic beautiful penis you have, Mrs PH is a lucky woman!”

Actually happened.

Actually happened.

You were that Doctor?

On a similar vein, I had to have a prostate exam recently. As I manfully tried to imagine I was somewhere – anywhere – else, he said “try to relax, and don’t be embarassed, it’s quite normal to get an erection during this process”

But i haven’t, i said.

“Not you, me”

I’m guessing he was just trying to make an uncomfortable procedure less so?

…like a yawning fox.

😆 @theotherjonv

Wwaswas, nope.

Voyeur.