My children have been beating each other senseless so I need some jokes. Please. This is serious.

whats et short for? Its because he has little legs

why did the baker have stinky fingers? he kneaded a poo.

🙂

Sigh. Why can’t they just get along?

I went to a retro magazine fair the other day. Claimed it has something for everyone, but I couldn’t get a look-in.

Foreplay. That’s thinking outside the box.

Mate of mine is really narcissistic. I told him to take a good hard look at himself.

Horses for Courses. Best name ever for a French restaurant.

My birthday is Feb 14th. My postman thinks I’m a massive stud.

I often wonder why Agent Orange never featured in war poetry.

When sharks’ TV shows go bad, do they go under the Fonz?

Had a waterfight in the park with the local kids today,

I Won!

No one’s a match for me and my kettle.

Tough crowd.

Fingerbike > yes! \o/

What’s white and stops you working?
David Cameron.