• This topic has 31 replies, 23 voices, and was last updated 6 years ago by piha.
Viewing 32 posts - 1 through 32 (of 32 total)
  • Hotel Windows
  • lesgrandepotato
    Full Member

    Why must they not be fully opened? Why is this?

    Cougar
    Full Member

    Lemmings.

    trail_rat
    Free Member

    Incase Liam Gallagher comes to visit and tries to throw the telly out the window.

    Stoner
    Free Member

    I was in a hotel in Rotterdam 2 weekends ago and room on the 6th floor had 4’x4′ windows that opened fully! It was difficult to stop myself launching out.

    lesgrandepotato
    Full Member

    I don’t think Liam Gallagher is in the travel lodge in Staines. There may be lemmings though

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    Lemmings.

    You’ve missed an opportunity to use one of your favourite words Cougar

    TheBrick
    Free Member

    I regularly undo bolts, screws etc to get round this.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    I don’t think Liam Gallagher is in the travel lodge in Staines. There may be lemmings though

    TBF, if I was in a Travelodge in Staines I’d probably welcome locked windows.

    You’ve missed an opportunity to use one of your favourite words Cougar

    😆 That took me a moment, and assuming we’re on the same page it disturbs me greatly that you remembered that. (-:

    AD
    Full Member

    Neuss Holiday Inn last week (living the dream :)) and windows fully opened on 6th floor. There was a however a sticker in both German and English warning you to be careful and keep children away.
    Weird how many people blame Europe for stupid health and safety laws…

    P-Jay
    Free Member

    Premier Inn I stayed in London you couldn’t even open them a little bit, just a ‘helpful’ sign to confirm that no, you haven’t lost the ability to open a window, they’re sealed, but if you’re a bit warm you can turn on the AC and spend the night being dried out as a noisy fan runs above your head.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    You’ve missed an opportunity to use one of your favourite words Cougar

    And now my brain’s just segued into Roy Castle.

    If you wanna be the best,
    And you wanna beat the rest,
    Ooh ee ooh, defenestration’s what you need.

    Cougar
    Full Member

    spend the night being dried out as a noisy fan runs above your head.

    Desiccation’s what you need.

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    That took me a moment, and assuming we’re on the same page it disturbs me greatly that you remembered that. (-:

    Its just a word that sticks in my head as I once read a script for a play that was set entirely within the second or so between the moment Chet Baker fell out of his hotel window and the moment he hit the pavement.

    peterno51
    Full Member

    I take great satisfaction in destroying any such things that are placed in the way of opening the bloody window.

    Unless is just a sealed window type thing. Which could get a bit tinkly smashy.

    shermer75
    Free Member

    Stops the creepy clown that’s stood outside from getting in

    Cougar
    Full Member

    Its just a word that sticks in my head

    For what it’s worth, I can’t claim credit. I stole it from Robert Rankin. His theory is that it’s something you must do to small screws left over after reassembling an electronic device, otherwise a descent into madness ensues.

    I once read a script for a play that was set entirely within the second or so between the moment Chet Baker fell out of his hotel window and the moment he hit the pavement.

    That’s niche even for STW.

    hot_fiat
    Full Member

    I carry a multi tool in my luggage mainly to defeat such devices. I also enjoy unlocking the locked-down TV interfaces, hacking Wi-fi routers and contemplating troubleshooting non-draining hotel sinks. Hotel rooms are very boring.

    bikebouy
    Free Member

    Keeps the cockroaches inside and the locusts out.

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    That’s niche even for STW.

    Actually – thinking about it

    As a student I was a beneficiary of a small grant-giving trust who funded a project of mine. Several years later a girl I was going out with was proof-reading my CV, noticed the trust I’d been funded by, and it turned out it was a trust trust the had been creating in the memory of her ex-boyfriend and had been created after he’d fallen out of a hotel window.

    So if you ….

    take great satisfaction in destroying any such things that are placed in the way of opening the bloody window.

    … please be kind enough to mention me in your will.

    Flaperon
    Full Member

    In Berlin the hotel I stay in will give you a key for the windows, but only if you sign a form promising not to throw yourself out of it…

    huckleberryfatt
    Free Member

    Hotel rooms are very boring

    You’re just not trying
    <throws another shrimp in the trouser press>

    jimbobo
    Free Member

    100mm opening limit. HSE stuff.

    maccruiskeen
    Full Member

    100mm opening limit.

    Exactly – and its not the 1970s – you’d have no trouble getting a flat screen TV out through that so what are all the budding Keith Moons moaning about?

    rOcKeTdOg
    Full Member

    keith Moon

    Who?

    genesiscore502011
    Free Member

    Boom tish 😆

    globalti
    Free Member

    You don’t open your hotel window in Africa unless you fancy swatting mozzies all night and possibly getting malaria.

    wombat
    Full Member

    The installation of opening restrictors on hotel windows was largely responsible for the development of the flat screen TV as the result of a court case in (I think) 1983.

    IIRC Motley Crue were touring Europe and discovered that they couldn’t launch their in room TVs out of the windows due to the restrictors. They took the hotel chain to court and claimed that it was their right, as rock stars, to be able to defenestrate large electronic devices out of their accommodation.

    The hotel chain’s defence was that the need for public safety and preventing children falling out of windows overruled The Crue’s lifestyle “entitlements”.

    A compromise was reached that meant that the hotel chain had to fund the development of televisions that could fit out of a window with the approved restrictor fitted.

    We now have thin tellys which can fit out off hotel windows and you can thank Nikki Sixx for that

    martymac
    Full Member

    Wombat, i wish that was true, seriously..

    jekkyl
    Full Member

    Is it to stop filthy smokers from being tempted to lean out to enjoy a cancer stick, thereby rendering the room with stench and inviting the accidental opportunity for a pavement smoker interface. That’s what I always presumed.

    Flaperon
    Full Member

    <throws another shrimp in the trouser press>

    That’s disgusting.

    For crying out loud, everyone knows that the trouser press is to be used solely for what it’s designed for: cheese toasties.

    surroundedbyhills
    Free Member

    BITD I worked in a hotel: Following a very high profile case of a man coked up and dancing on a 4th storey window ledge and then being dead shortly after in the street below, all of which was filmed in glorious Sony8mm by his girlfriend, the hotel was sued by the Local Authority for not have restrictors fitted to the windows. After the case hotel guests just took lots of pills in order to end things, much tidier and no need for shovels.

    piha
    Free Member

    A good few years ago I had to catch the first flight I could to a Templepatrick hotel and fit restrictors on all their windows. I asked the G.M why the rush to fit the restrictors and his reply to me was the previous morning there was quite a commotion around breakfast time and the staff and guests rushed out to see what was going on. When everyone had gathered outside and looked up they were greeted with the sight of a fellow guest trying to push his partner out of a 1st floor window. I think restrictors are a good idea. 😀

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