Apologies to people who believe meat-eating is wrong. This is right. So so right – in a greedy fat man way…no veg just a big swirl of Cumberland deliciousness.

I can’t see how anything about that could be anything other than massively right 🙂

Did you buy a stottie so you could eat it like the world’s largest sausage roll?

Coeliac mate so bread products that could contain this are long a thing of the past!

Doffs virtual hat in respect.

Red or brown sauce?

I can’t cook my own meat (colourblind) so on home alone nights it’s either beans on toast or takeaway.

Why not just get a meat thermometer blue arsed fly?

Or burn it to buggery? Anyway no sauce tonight, just a dawd of mustard…devoured!

You can tell if meat’s cooked by pressing on it with a finger: jelly like = raw, firm = cooked

I hope it was bought in Cumbria?! Both Lindsay’s butchers and Harrison’s butchers in Cockermouth do fantastic Cumberland sausage.

joshvegas – Member
Why not just get a meat thermometer blue arsed fly?

Last time I cooked chicken for myself, the next day my arse resembled an old radiator being emptied.

I can cook stews etc as they’re just done by time, I’ve tried nuking meat in the past but it’s just crap.

I thought sausage contained cereal?

rOcKeTdOg – Member
I thought sausage contained cereal?

POSTED 5 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST

Sausage contains many things, sometimes even meat!

I thought sausage contained cereal?

GF ones don’t.

you could do steak by weight and a timer

No sauce at all!

Or buy fillet steak. Get pan smoking put said fillet steak in pan on one side, count to 10 and turn over, count to 10 again and serve. 😀

Recipe not recommended for those who don’t like their steak still mooing/capable of walking off the plate…I may also be understating the cooking time (or overstating it…)

DISCLAIMER: this may or may not be safe/healthy…quite possibly not in fact.

Someone has curled one out on your grill pan.

Drac – Moderator
Someone has curled one out on your grill pan.

garage-dweller – Member
Or buy fillet steak. Get pan smoking put said fillet steak in pan on one side, count to 10 and turn over, count to 10 again and serve.

Recipe not recommended for those who don’t like their steak still mooing/capable of walking off the plate…I may also be understating the cooking time (or overstating it…)

DISCLAIMER: this may or may not be safe/healthy…quite possibly not in fact.

Absolutely fine. Sounds quite long enough.

I like to have a bite of my steak before it goes in the pan. Delicious.

I can’t cook my own meat (colourblind) so on home alone nights it’s either beans on toast or takeaway

That’s the worst excuse for not being able to cook that I’ve ever heard. 😆

Proper sausages like wot my butcher sells are meat plus seasonings. That’s it.

Needs cooked in the oven….imo.

Respec’ bro!

I learnt about the Man Tea from my dad, from an early age. Whenever my mum was away, I didn’t need to ask what we were having for tea. We were having steak and chips 😀

My favourite is a Fray Bentos pie! I know they probably contain all sorts of stuff I’d rather not know about , but with so,e chips and beans, they’re mega.

Fray bentos….

Read the ingredients list… It probably says something like…

No animals were harmed in the production of this product….

And how can it be a pie if the casing is made of steel ?

bluearsedfly – Member

joshvegas – Member
Why not just get a meat thermometer blue arsed fly?

Last time I cooked chicken for myself, the next day my arse resembled an old radiator being emptied.

I can cook stews etc as they’re just done by time, I’ve tried nuking meat in the past but it’s just crap.

Chicken is the real risk there rather than other meat types, surely? You’re fine with beef (steaks rather than minced) and pork (same thing), surely, you just have to cook and seal the outside, then work out how to get them cooked to taste?

Last time I cooked chicken for myself, the next day my arse resembled an old radiator being emptied.

I can cook stews etc as they’re just done by time, I’ve tried nuking meat in the past but it’s just crap.

Really??? Here’s some tips for chicken:

Oven 200c Fan.

Roast Chicken breast 25 minutes.
Roast Chicken thighs 40 minutes.

This will not poison you.

and pork (same thing)

pork?

can contain tapeworm… cook thoroughly.

Pork? As a man tea?

1. Place in slow cooker
2. Pour in can of ginger beer
3. Go to the pub
4. Return from pub
5. Remove pork from slow cooker
6. Eat

mrmonkfinger – Member
and pork (same thing)
pork?

can contain tapeworm… cook thoroughly.

Absolute bunkum these days (and it was round worm not tape worm!). Go to any good restaurant your pork will be served pink. Here’s some facts:

Misconceptions about pork (volume 1, chapter 3)
The “safe” temperature for cooking pork is one of the most misunderstood – and distorted – aspects of food safety. Numerous so-called authorities or experts recommend massively overcooking pork. Why pork? The usual reason given is the danger of contamination with the roundworm Trichinella spiralis.

This assertion is misleading for several reasons, as discussed below. Most importantly, improvements in pork farming and processing practices have virtually eliminated Trichinella contamination in commercially produced pork in developed countries. One study showed that only eight cases of trichinellosis (also called trichinosis) could be attributed to pork grown commercially in the United States between 1997 and 2001. During that same period, the American population consumed about 32 billion kg / 70 billion 1b of pork. That’s an awful lot of pork to generate only eight cases of trichinellosis.

8 Cases per 32 billion kg of pork? – I’ll have mine pink please. 🙂

32 billion kg of pork

Even Katie Price would baulk at that.

Must say, I’m surprised. I was expecting “home alone, man tea” to be a Pot Noodle and a six-pack of Wotsits.

or cook some pasta, chop some veg and bang it into a frying pan then add tomatoes, then swirl the pasta into the sauce

serve with red wine

or even easier – cook pasta, drain, add olive oil, add chopped chorizo, swirl on low heat to release oils from chorizo, serve

super noodles + hot dog sausages.

Home Alone. Man tea.

Man-Dinner, Shirley?

From now on , will be microwaved poached eggs for me.

chop some veg

Woah there sunshine. Go away and have a think about it.

Last time I cooked chicken for myself, the next day my arse resembled an old radiator being emptied.

Just had to repeat that quote once more, had me chuckling away to myself.

And yeh,

chop some veg

Clue’s in the flippin’ thread title chap.

This should have been my tea last night. Proper fat, home made bangers.

Can’t wait for Birgit to return from Germany next week 🙁

Mustard was the right choice. HP would also be good. Ketchup with sausage can get to f…

Woah there sunshine. Go away and have a think about it.

Lol