Viewing 29 posts - 1 through 29 (of 29 total)
  • hmmm, anger management needed i think…
  • muddydwarf
    Free Member

    Went mental on a motorist on Monday night.

    Pulled out of my local superstore carpark (Tesco) & indicated i was turning right. 30yrds ahead is a set of lights leading to large crossroads.
    Lights are red & have just changed, so will be red for the next couple of minutes at least. I’m turning right so sit in the middle of the left hand lane – which is for right & straight ahead (feeder lane for turning left).
    The muppet in the big Merc C-Class behind me decides he can’t bear to sit behind a cyclist at the lights and so decides to cut me up at the last second, his rear nearside quarter almost clipping me as he passed.

    I rode up alongside his driver’s side and angrily asked him “Do you have any f***ing idea what you just did? You almost hit me!”
    He answered “yeah, yeah, yeah” & wound his window back up.

    I lost it for some reason (maybe the sneer on his face) and tried to punch through his window (failing miserably i might add!) then headbutting it and repeatedly punching the window yellling “get out the f***ing’ car i’m gonna kill you!”
    Then i punched his wingmirror off, & he jumped the car halfway across the white line. I picked up my bike & threatened to throw it through the rear windshield & he drove off through the red light & oncoming traffic leaving me stood wielding the bike above my head looking pretty foolish.

    Felt really shaky when i got home, think i may need some professional help…

    nukeproof
    Free Member

    Felt really shaky when i got home

    I’m not surprised after reading that 😯

    I know forums can be good for a bit of ‘therapy’ but are you sure you want to fess to this online?

    Stoner
    Free Member

    just think if you were wearing your re-enactment garb…. would surely put the willies up him 🙂

    ah well. You lost your temper it happens. No ones perfect.
    Except of course all the perfect people who shall shortly be along to berate you for such appalling behaviour 🙂

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    grumm
    Free Member

    You’re not kidding…

    racing_ralph
    Free Member

    two words – you prick

    Steve-Austin
    Free Member

    small man syndrome?

    PJ266
    Free Member

    Meh? you got angry, big deal. At least he drove off and didnt kick your head in 😉

    theboatman
    Free Member

    I was right with you up until the headbutting his car bit, that’s proper mental! I can turn on a bit of banging on window/ shouting fury if it fits the occasion, but equally I can turn it off or keep it under wraps, most road incidents just wash over me. If it’s a one off and you scared yourself a bit I wouldn’t worry, but if it is part of a pattern or regular kicking off, might be worth having a chat to someone.

    muddydwarf
    Free Member

    Well there is that!

    99% of the time i’m really placid on the road, wave cars past me, say thanks etc obey the rules, don’t jump red lights etc.
    It’s only when people drive as though i’m not there even though i’m in plain view that i get angry.

    TandemJeremy
    Free Member

    I used to lose my temper with numpties such as that – and have done so relatively recently. I realised however that I was getting myself wound up so making the incident worse. I have decided the key thing is to spoil their day more than they spoilt yours. In this case you might have given him a fright but you have also wound yourself right up. Probably by the “spoil their day more than they spoilt yours” you came out a loser.

    So whilst not letting them away with it don’t get yourself wound up into a frenzy. Slap the roof of the car – does no damage but makes a satisfying noise. Threaten to take the mirror off or smash the glass – but don’t actually do it. Laugh in his face if he gets angry. Find a nice line in insults to use. “Hope yer next craps a pineapple” “thrombus” “got a liscence? where from? A cornflake packet?”

    Ride away laughing that he got all upset and you didn’t. That way you come out on top.

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    next time take your phone out & photograph him – seems to make people nervous IME

    taka
    Free Member

    you should of dragged him out of his car and give the **** what he deserves

    terrahawk
    Free Member

    to be fair, this isn’t the first time you’ve completely lost it in public is it?

    I recall a thread involving you and a female motorist – admittedly in the wrong but I recall you were going to kill her too.

    You should get some help mate before you do something you’ll get put away for.

    muddydwarf
    Free Member

    Terrahawk – that’s what worried me.

    I’m currently taking the happy pills as well, wonder if my doc can fix me up with some councelling?

    TandemJeremy
    Free Member

    Hmmm – happy pills can do funny things to your emotional control. Your Doc should be getting you counselling anyway if you are on the pills – they are not a cure merely a treatment.

    Go and see him.

    muddydwarf
    Free Member

    Time to give MIND & the doc a ring i think…

    terrahawk
    Free Member

    well, I suppose you’re halfway there by recognising there’s a problem.
    I’m far from an expert though.

    muddydwarf
    Free Member

    I scared the poo out of myself to be honest, especially after promising to stab the bloke who was playing around with the ex behind my back on the Sunday.

    stratobiker
    Free Member

    You failed hopelessly.
    You should have had him out of the car and taken his keys off him.

    Why didn’t you put your bike in front of his car?
    Hopeless!

    No, really, you can’t be doing stuff like that, there’s too many nutters around.

    Terra is right.

    baa
    Free Member

    As mentioned above happy pills usually don’t work on their own,
    I also have counselling, which I pay for (40 quid an hour)
    It’s not for everyone, but it works for me.
    Hope every thing gets sorted

    Baa

    bigyinn
    Free Member

    Is it too late to ask if your bike is fitted with bombers?

    TBH I sympathise with your reaction, all they get is a scratch on their metal box, you could end up minced on the road, hence the reaction.
    I would agree that your reaction was a tad OTT, i’d have a chat with your doc, like TJ says alternative happy pills?

    stevestunts
    Free Member

    As a previous user of the happy pills (over-consumption of the non-legal type probably having a large contribution towards needing the legal type), I’d suggest having a chat with your GP if you’re finding you’re doing things out of character – particularly if you recognise that’s not your normal behaviour.

    I know the first lot I tried had me doing some proper weird stuff, but didn’t actually do anything at all to help with the reasons I was taking them. It took a few different tries to find something that worked for me.

    Like others have said, counselling is definitely worth a try. It helped me massively.

    simondbarnes
    Full Member

    think i may need some professional help…

    You do, and quickly.

    TheLittlestHobo
    Free Member

    pmsl at trying to headbutt the car 🙂

    Kick the door and snap the wingmirrors off, but never headbutt the car man

    RudeBoy
    Free Member

    #
    racing_ralph – Member

    two words – you prick
    Posted 2 hours ago # Report-Post
    #
    Steve-Austin – Member

    small man syndrome?

    Because of course, comments like that are sooo sensible and clever.. 🙄

    Personally, I think you’ve shown a fair bit of courage, for coming on here, and being honest about stuff. And I can definitely, 100% relate to that.

    I’m not quite as bad these days, but I used to act in an extremely violent manner, toward bad car drivers. Invariably, following incidents where I cooduv been killed. The adrenaline is pumping, the red mist descends, and you’re like a psych nutcase.

    Yeah, I can really understand that.

    For me, it’s still an issue, which I take seriously. I have been nicked quite a few times, during my life, for violent offences. Some of which were pretty bad. I won’t go into things, but people have been hospitalised, as a result of my actions.

    I’m not proud of this, and my behaviour has had a negative impact on relationships with others. I’ve never attacked a woman, though. Only other men. Women never seem to drive me over the edge, in terms of The Rage. Which is perhaps fortunate.

    A recent incident (couple of years ago) made me realise I had to change. Or, I would probbly end up inside. Not where I want to be.

    The trick is, to be able to recognise ‘trigger points’, and praps avoid the kind of situation where you might ‘lose it’. Also, strenuous exercise is good! I got right into my swimming, which is almost a form of meditation, for me, and really chills me out. And it’s really good for you.

    The reasons why you lose control could be many. Neurological, chemical, psychological, etc. Could be something inherent in your physiology, or your character. My dad suffers from exactly the same thing as me, and his dad did, before him. Doctors can’t suss this sort of stuff out, very easily. I also get wound up easily; I can be very passionate about things (some ladies find this a good thing), and will not let things go. I know, thattul surprise some of you lot.

    Muddy, drop me an email. rudeboy@virgin.net. Include a pic of your hobby, with a piece of equipment you use, so I know it’s you.

    RealMan
    Free Member

    Ive been hit by motorists a few times. The last time I was going around a roundabout, and a female motorist just decided to pull out onto the roundabout, into me.

    It hurt.

    I got up, clothes ripped, blood down my leg, limped the bike over to the pavement, made sure it still had 2 wheels etc, then cycled off.

    I couldve smashed her windscreen in. I probably could have dragged her out of the car and beat her up. I couldve just explained what she did wrong. But to be honest, none of those things are going to undo what she did to me. And the way she did it, I dont think any amount of explaination is going to make her a better driver.

    I just worry that she, and other people like her, are still allowed on the roads, with the ability to kill any cyclist they see (or dont see).

    I dont agree with what you did, but at the same time, I feel that the driver deserved at least that.

    Trekster
    Full Member

    Guys I have been commuting to work for the past 30yrs and have had very few near misses never mind hits. Near misses I smile, fill their mirrors and carry on.

    I would suggest you need to review your own road craft/awareness of others, and chill.

    radoggair
    Free Member

    Think what you did was totally acceptable. Keep up the good work!!

    Hope you break that window next time, or scratch the crap out of his car. Taking your seat post out will help you smash that window. Dont listen to those who say you need help because the next person who cuts you up could kill you. Since i spend at least nearly 2 hours a day on the road i’m accustomed to drivers but if any pull a stunt on me they know about it. Why should i stay calm, what lesson will they learn?. Nothing, they’ll continue doing what they do until they seriously hurt someone.

    So far in the past 6 months i had a van who hit the side of me at 30mph(stayed on luckily), 2 cars u-turning in front of me from a parked position, someone pulling into a street causing me to mount the pavement to avoid him, a lady today who attempted to go left around me at a roundabout although i was going straight on(abs worked luckily), a guy tonight in his Audi on my way home from work who didn’t have any lights on (1:20am) on the phone who managed to stop about 5 ft from me (i was going round a roundabout he was entering), a big rig who cut in to early missing me by inches….. god there’s more but you get the point

    GreenRoom
    Free Member

    Well done for your honesty.

    You would seriously regret carrying out your threats. The Driver of the merc may have done something wrong but that doesn’t entitle you to behave in an off the scale way, his wrong behaviour doesn’t give your much worse behaviour a green light (which I think you know)

    I think you already know the answer to if you need help or not. I used to have loads of anger management issues and was actually pretty scared I was going to hurt someone in a blind rage and end up in jail with only my conscience and regrets to keep me company. It was ruining my life. Turned out I had pretty severe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Life is much better since I admitted I had a problem and got some treatment although I wont deny it was hard work. I now rarely lose my temper and a whole load of other stuff is improving too.

    No idea what your underlying causes might be but get help mate you will feel a whole lot better. I for one will respect you if you do.

    Green Room

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