so, the priest for our son's christening speaks english and mrsturnip asked me months ago to find something for him to read out in the ceremony and obviously i have done nothing…

it's this weekend, anyone got any ideas. can be from the bible or not- i don't mind

google just gives me a load of lame stuff
this sort of this is quite important in meditteranean countries so i'll be in naughty corner if i can't get anything. any ideas…please

Mark 10:13-16

short, simple, works for most

Philip Larkin's This Be The Verse?

They **** you up, your mum and dad
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were **** up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.

I don't do god.

I've not heard of that reading Woppit.

I'd suggest going retro with proper fire and brimstone type stuff – completely inappropriate for a christening IMO but I reckon it'd go down well in a Catholic country, no?