I had a punch up with Bob Mortimer because he wouldn’t let me look in a drawer for my soldering iron.

No understand.

More importantly, did you win in the punch up or did Mortimer own you?

Was Vic involved anywhere? Or we’re you Vic? Or George Doors

Closet necrophiliac

Girlie punch to the back of his head. He cried.

Vic wasn’t there.

Incident took place in the utility room at my mum and dad’s house.

Well then I think it means you had a bit too much to drink last night then.

Not a drop.

Is your head spinning like a whirlpool?

In that case I think it has something to do with closets and donkey punching then.

Fighting with a bloke in a closet over a phallic shaped item. Sorry but I think you may be gay (not that that’s a problem might just be a bit of a shock) HTH 😀 Have a nice day.

suggest you take a look in your wife’s knicker drawer – there’ll be a large poo in there

Were you alive when you woke up?

Fighting with a bloke in a closet over a phallic shaped item. Sorry but I think you may begay (notthat that’s a problem might just be a bit of a shock) HTH Have a nice day.

You think a soldering iron is phallic??!

Too much cheese?

Might be you’ve seen the future

If Bob ever pops round your Mums house while your there……

You think a soldering iron is phallic??!

He was after an interpretation!

You are Ulrika Johnson and I claim my £5

You think a soldering iron is phallic??!

Mine has a hot tip.

Dreams eh… think yourself lucky it was Bob Mortimer.

I’ve watched a bit of R&M in my time. Was this definitely a dream?

Incident took place in the utility room at my mum and dad’s house.

I had a feeling your mother might be involved.

Freudian psychoanalysis 101.

Very, very vivid… stil can’t get it out of my head.

I need the soldering iron quickly and I know which drawer it is in (in my mum’s utility room). I can see it poking out of the drawer. Bob is standing in my way and says that I should wait my turn. He then procedes to root through every cupboard VERY SLOWLY (the bastard), so I punch him with the worst punch ever thrown and he cries.

This is so weird that it is disturbing me.

My soldering iron is in a tool box under my stairs.
I haven’t lived under the same roof as my mum for 20 odd years.
I like Bob Mortimer although I have never met him.

Was Vic a burglar ? Come to steel yer bikes?? If so it’s only just you give him a smack, do one for me too as I’m not a fan…. Never have been, abhorrent man,

I think it means you need new shoes. Possibly high heels

my soldering iron was in my mum’s utility room

😯

This is so weird that it is disturbing me.

Good, at least you have some shred of decency

Just be thankful trains and tunnels were not involved also…..that would be REAL cause for concern