After an unfortunate – ahem – accident, I can’t seem to get the jizz stains out of my trousers no matter what I do

Split some stans sealent on a favourite pair of light coloured slouching around trousers. Stuck them in the wash and the stains won’t come out. I assume it’s the silicone leaving a mark. Have tried various stain removers to no avail. Any ideas?

Grow a beard and make out it’s just the latest hipster thang?

just tell people you were doing some DIY plastering.

Could work, but unfortunately the stains are around the crotch & upper thigh area, so they look deeply suspicious!

Have you been out riding with STW staff?

Could work, but unfortunately the stains are around the crotch & upper thigh area, so they look deeply suspicious

I was just cleaning it and it went off in my hand, Officer.

Try Johnsons talcum powder, it can sometimes lift oil stains from cotton fabric

Is that a plaster’s radio then?

That’s the STW office radio…..

I jizzed all up the wall and all over the wifes car !

It’s not coming out.

Latex is a suspension of protein strands in water. Agitate it (ie when air bubbles through it) and the protein strands bind together to form rubber, which is why it seals leaks in your tyres.

Let it soak into your trousers then agitate it in a washing machine, you’ve turned it into rubber within the fibres of your jeans. The only thing to do if you get it on your clothes again is to chuck them in a bath of water immediately and try and soak it out without agitating. That worked for me.

Find something that breaks down latex. Try brake fluid – that won’t harm the cotton and will wash out. You could try mineral oil but that’s hard to get out (use fairy liquid) or WD40 might help – that washes out easily, I’ve used it as a stain solvent before.

Apparently turps can dissolve latex – but that’s hard to find these days, turps substitute is white spirit and may not work.

You might want to remove the trousers while trying the above

Best. Thread. Ever.

Agitate it

I think that’s what caused the stains in the first place.

No chance a warm iron through kitchen paper might lift it out?

Mate of mine had an accident with some silver paint and accidentally spilt a load of it on his crotch. He tried the turps cleaning method for that without taking the trousers off and managed to burn his pubes off. Apparently.

So, you have been warned.

Next time, i suggest you wear something you don’t mind “spilling” on….

You wouldn’t mind spilling on Julian Clarey?

Rubber trousers, now there’s an idea – easy wipe clean and all that!

will try some of the ideas above and if those don’t work, resort to fitting new tyres naked in future!

Try nail varnish remover. Gets rid of most things.

Just spread more ‘sealant’* over the rest of the trousers so the stain disappears!

*producing enough ‘sealant’ to totally cover a pair of trousers might take a few days!

I’ve ruined two pairs of riding shorts and two tops. Both from punctures in the rear that wouldn’t seal. Jizz everywhere! 😯

[video]https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=p2Mi995ggFU[/video]

punctures in the rear

Apparently drips are in fashion – the jewelers next to my office has this in the window

Everytime I walk past it I wonder if I’m the only person who thinks its reminiscent of something else . . .

Obviously pearls are now out of fashion

sticky neck anyone?

we use lots of latex adhesive and i use it for homemade tyre jizz
lots of stuff will soften it and remove
solvents like ctc , acetone white spirit , turps petrol

the problem with the volatile solvent is keeping the stain wet with them .
white spirit will do it but smells for a while .

or even try after shave I have used that in an emergency spill on a carpt

must avoid pear necklace joke, must avoid…..

comedy gold

must avoid pear necklace

I think you need to get yourself checked out