I was thinking about this today. The funniest, out of context one liner that I can think of is

“No Dougal, these cows are small, those cows are far away.”

But I’m willing to listen to alternative suggestions.

“well now you’ve got Norfolk’s maddest man!”

or

“No way, you big spastic, you’re a mentalist!”

and 1200 others

The bounce has gone from his bungee.

You ain’t seen ‘Bad Boys II’?

“No Mr Bond. I expect you to die”…… cracks me up every time I hear it.

“you’ve got to be **** kidding…!!”

“Back off Warchild, seriously”

Loddrick +1

We are going to need a bigger boat

“And stop stealing monkeys”
“**** you”
“Fair enough”

“Guess she don’t like the cornbread either.”
“What do you expect us to use man, harsh language?”

And sundry others from the Aliens script 😀

this town needs an enema! 😀

A fire! In a Waterpark!

Men behaving badly:

“Do you want an oyster”

“No thanks mate, they disagree with me”

Holds up oyster “No we don’t!”

That might not be word for word, but still makes me laugh!

“He slimed me Ray”

Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?
John Winger: [John and Russell look at each other] You mean, like, flaming, or…
Recruiter: Well, it’s a standard question we have to ask.
Russell Ziskey: No, we’re not homosexual, but we are *willing to learn*.
John Winger: Yeah, would they send us someplace special?

That’s the first time tonight I’ve known what he’s got in his hand.

Phoenix Nights

Paddy: “Prostitutes are rough in Amsterdam, one of em’ told me to wash my old man in the sink!”

Max: “You took your Dad!?”

“do I look normal to you”

Danny devito in Twins, as he try’s to justify parking in a handicap zone.

Make like fish men 😆

“is your hair supposed to look like that…?”

We’ve gone on holiday by mistake – can you help us ?

Inedible muck and not enough of it!

Surely you can’t be serious?

Dude, what does mine say?

Thin blue line.

Just remember, It’s your cock up, my arse”

That rug really tied the room together.

[video]http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=VOmD-xqK2Es[/video]

Chock full of them!
[video]http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=LcKJdmXbBBc[/video]

GARLIC BREAD?

Bloke lying on his front and blood all over the backside area

Cop says no signs of forced entry

Good old Horatio says “I wouldn’t be so sure about that”

I’m warning you,I’m a Librarian and I’ve fought evil in many forms… approximately 35… give or take

“That’s what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.”

Dazed and confused 🙂

This made me chuckle.

NB Bad language so I wont embed

Movie insults

“Nice beaver”

Choppers dad on seeing his son for the first time after a long prison stretch “Nice shirt son, I like it. Do they make ’em for men?”

from ‘Rab.C.Nesbitt’…the scene where James’y Cotter takes his young girlfriend to a restaurant…

Waiter…”cheesy dip, sir?”

James’y Cotter…”nah, she’s had a bath”

Smells like bigfoot’s d1ck!

Anchorman

“Milk was a bad choice”

Anchorman

grievoustim – Member
“Milk was a bad choice”

Love that one

‘Don’t tell him Pike’

the recent film Ted,
After having sex with Norah;

Norah Jones: You did well for a guy with no d**k.
Ted: Yeah, you have *no* idea how many angry letters I have written to Hasbro about that.

Nice beaver