I’m worried that I’ve burnt myself out recently. I have a full time job which is stressful (but generally not long hours), and I was so anxious about work last month that I barely slept for 3 weeks. I also had a 2-day trip to the US which was fine apart from the fact that I didn’t sleep for 2 days after I got home and then only for 4 hours on the following 2 nights due to jet lag. Managed to calm down with help from my counsellor and sleeping a bit better now but I feel utterly exhausted physically and mentally. My legs are literally buzzing and I’m struggling with riding my bike. I get SAD every autumn which isn’t helping. I’m juggling several things at work and seem to be surrounded by people demanding instant responses to their emails.
My counsellor warned me to take more care of myself but I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I need a couple of days off work but I feel worried about asking.
I’m trying to eat healthily and I don’t drink much alcohol.
Any ideas?

Get a different job or learn to switch off from work. Sounds like your job stress is making you ill and you need to do something about it before you really do crash and burn…

I’m completely with you, vickypea, so at least you have a sympathiser!

Seriously, though, returning from North America – especially after a short time – can take weeks to recover from. Last year, after a week in Ontario, I spontaneously fell asleep at my desk twice over the course of a couple of weeks, and stayed tired for at least a month.

It seems that I affected by autumn SAD, I have a decent diet, and don’t drink much. We probably ride a similar amount as well – although other than commuting, I haven’t been out much recently. One of the reasons is precisely because I feel like you describe. Only sertraline is keeping me from taking a really hard fall.

I would suggest that you really take it easy for a few weeks, and not have too many expectations for yourself – other than to get through a few box sets. Treat it like recovery time, and after awhile, you will be itching to get back in the saddle, literally and figuratively.

Have you tried mindfulness, or any other sort of meditation. That’s one technique to separate yourself from your thoughts, but might not work for everyone.

If you need a couple of days off work, take them. They’ll manage without you for a couple of days.

You can take up to a week off sick self certificated without needing a doctor’s note.

Or use holiday if you have any left and you’re worried about “taking a sickie”

I’m rather fortunate in that I’ve never experienced anxiety and stress, and all I get is an annual melancholy for a few days when I realise that summer’s gone. And as robust characters, Mrs BigJohn & I have always scoffed at crap and snake oil fads.

But I declare myself to be very impressed by the anecdotes of the benefits of mindfulness given by sensible people like MPs.

Take some time off. Work can be important but happiness is more importanter

My annual (for the last ~24 years) SAD is hitting me for six currently, not helped by having a head cold that has appeared to go and then come back over the last almost four weeks now. Sometimes I feel like there is a light chest infection going on, so I’ve cut my training and general rides right back to ~70 miles per week instead of ~130 over this time period.

And because of less ride time, I’m outdoors less, so SAD symptoms get worse. 😕

Maybe try doing “recovery ride” cycles, that won’t test your legs or heart too much?

Here’s one of mine from last week, taking it very steady in easy gears compared to a training ride, that just kept my October climbing challenge ticking over. https://www.strava.com/activities/1223798335

Demand a couple of days holiday ..explain why if need be .
Go to see your doc and ask if a vitamin b12 injection will help your condition..
Sleep for 2 days !

I’d listen to your counsellor and try and get some rest, go to your GP to discuss the anxiety and inform your work about how you are feeling and about setting priorities so you are not overwhelmed.

Give up the alcohol completely and look at your diet. You say it’s healthy but can you get more vegetables in there? I find that after a week on a diet of mostly vegetables and lean protien I feel great and have noticably more energy. Start going to bed early, force youself if you have to and maybe do something relaxing before hand such as a steam/sauna/hot bath.

I’m reading this whilst sat in front of a light box. Have s cold sore, spots and feel generally run down. This time of year is crap. I’ve been working a lot and trying to get the house ready for the new Funk arriving.

Taken today and tomorrow off work and already feel better for it. Sometimes you just need time to decompress.

Not sure if this will work, but no harm to try. I find Vitamin B supplements massively improve my mood and feelings when I feel like you describe. But more than anything take comfort in the fact that your feelings are far from uncommon.

Learn to say no, even to yourself. Prioritise, going as far as to let people know what they’re asking looks low priority and how important is it really. In business I used deal with urgent stuff straight away, stuff that would have to get dealt with sometime when I had time and then I had a big box. Anything that might eventually go away was thrown in it. It was most satisfying going through that box now and then as many problems had solved themselves, ceased to be problems or people had forgotten/lost interest/given up on me.

Look back at what you’ve done in the last year. How much of it would have caused a headache if not done?

Get a dog.
Take it for a long walk and tell it all your worries.
It’ll listen intently, won’t judge and will respond with unconditional and total love.

Who wouldn’t feel better after that?

bet you’ve got a smart phone and all your work emails appear on it .
Switch it off and read a book . Stuff them and their instant response emails. If its so important pick up the phone and speak to an actual person in real time , not send something that might or might not get to its intended reciepient as soon as send is pressed.
I got assisinated in a meeting this week , just about kept a lid on it as Im 2 weeks away from the 2 year point.

Was exactly where you are at end of July

Made my employers give me 5 weeks off. Did a mix of time with the kids (work phone switched off and in a drawer), a simple week of riding my bike on the Isle of Man and a few days of gluttony in the states. Mostly though just slept, relaxed, did a bit of moderate exercise.

Felt so much better since.

I’m juggling several things at work and seem to be surrounded by people demanding instant responses to their emails.

Can you manage people’s expectations on this point?

Either telling people you’ll get to them later or letting them work it out themselves?

I was so anxious about work last month that I barely slept for 3 weeks.

Sounds like you’ve already seen your GP, but I feel they’d probably advise taking a little time off work if you told them this.

Out of interest – are you being expected to do a full-time job in part-time hours?

If you don’t want to go full mindfulness here are some good tips:

Use the first hour of your day at work to accomplish something. Check emails after as they’ll pull you in all sorts of unfocused directions.

Set aside certain times to check and respond to emails. It’s unacceptable to expect instant responses and don’t get drawn in by at. They can phone if urgent.

My sister has a brilliant system called the Heather Small board (think M People greatest hits). Every day she writes what she achieved, even small stuff. It’s amazing even when you’ve had a “bad day” and the knob goblins at work are still after you how much you did do. It helps build a bit of self belief.

I’d advocate not reducing your work load but do try to maximise your time off by doing something totally different than you would normally do.
So, no riding bikes, no golf, no over eating, no more drink than you’d normally drink.. you get the idea..

Now, do something like painting, poetry, sculpture, pottery, bronze casting, stained glass making.. or using your time for volunteering in galleries or outdoor centres, or taking old folks or disabled to Bird sanctuary’s..

It’s a change of focus I’m advocating, not a reduction in workload because the mind needs to be active and yet have consistent focus (work) and the other stuff I’ve mentioned are the distraction and learning and cooperation factors that could help.

All the best.

Right there with you – I am really struggling at the moment. Not so much work related, although that is partially it (more the lost interest/financially insecure/no chance of ever retiring thing though), more the amount of crap that has gone down in my own life over the last few years that has really taken it’s toll.

I used to have legendary levels of patience – now I am on a very short fuse. I have no energy or enthusiasm, I just don’t *do* anything anymore – kinda like a shell of a human being rather than a proper functioning person. Semi robotic even!

I have absolutely no advice to give at the moment as I really don’t know where to start myself. People have suggested counselling, but I don’t really do that kind of thing and don’t see how a stranger would make it any easier. So long as I keep of suicide watch I think I am doing pretty well!

What I need to do is find myself again. But I am kinda lost.

Set permanent autoreply that you check emails twice a day AND STICK TO THAT.

Prioritise your to do list based on your needs not others’.

Be selfish.

Switch off phone and email the second you finish work. Work mobile comms are a tool for YOU to do YOUR job when away from your desk, not a 24/7 callout lifeline for others.

Basically reclaim control.

Yes, I’ve been there so I’m speaking from experience here.

Good luck.

Wow, thanks for all these replies and suggestions! I’ve just sat here and read through them all properly.
All good suggestions. For the past 18 months I’ve actually been really strict about not working long hours (with very few exceptions) and I never check emails outside of office hours. I also make sure I get fresh air and a walk at lunchtime or at least a decent coffee break with a friend every day. I find mindfulness quite good but I must admit that I let it lapse and should pick it up again.

i normally “treat” my anxiety by riding my bike really hard but that’s not good when I’m not sleeping.
I love drawing and painting so I think I’ll treat myself to doing some of that over the weekend.

I have no words of wisdom, only posting to let you know your not alone.

Get signed off work right now – and not a couple of days but at least a fortnight. Once you have your mind back on an even keel then reassess your life. If work is making you ill its work that is the problem.

I reached a point not as bad as this but getting that way a couple of years ago. I didn’t go off sick I got transferred to a post much more suitable to me. It was like a huge weight went and only then did I realise just how much I was struggling.

work to live – don’t live to work

I appreciate the jet lag but are you able to do any other type of exercise? I find it’s a bit of an adrenaline dump. I haven’t been riding much recently so I’ve started running and I feel amazing!

And – take some time off before it’s too late.

Capt. Kronos

counselling can and often is very helpful. Been on both sides of it. What you describe is exactly the sort of thing counselling can sort out

If your leg was broken you would seek expert help – why not do so when your head is broken?

Everyone is different, but I’ve found I have to treat training rides like caffeine, doing much of either after ~1700 plays havoc with me getting to sleep that night!

No bright lights (especially not a light box)after ~1800; use “twighlight” app on tablet to web browse with blue light reduction in evenings which helps SAD sufferers start to wind down (I’m not a book reader, non-smart activity would be far better for me); try and be in bed winding down by 2130 at the latest; try (but not always successful in the autumn/winter) to get up at the same time regardless of whether it’s a work or non-work day.

Vickypea… Thought you might find this useful….

https://medium.com/@OlarkLiveChat/its-2017-and-mental-health-is-still-an-issue-in-the-workplace-61efbef092f

As the story goes… there is no difference between time off from work for a broken leg and time off work for a broken mind.

I’ve been in the same situation and didn’t take proper action, which was stupid. The last time it got really bad ‘luckily’ I was made redundant and several months later felt a bit more myself. My current job isn’t remotely stressful but knowing I have to find another soon is causing the same sleep problems to come back, probably not helped by the sudden dark days, I’m totally exhausted by the time i get home from work.

andyrm – Member
Switch off phone and email the second you finish work. Work mobile comms are a tool for YOU to do YOUR job when away from your desk, not a 24/7 callout lifeline for others.

😯 I guess you’ve never worked in a food manufacturing environment its 24/7/365

I’ve spent many holidays talking people through stuff when its gone wrong.

NOpe mr Overshoot – thats nothing to do with the type of job – thats poor management and you allowing yourself to be used. Work your contracted hours and no more.

NOpe mr Overshoot – thats nothing to do with the type of job – thats poor management and you allowing yourself to be used.

^^this.

I guess you’ve never worked in a food manufacturing environment its 24/7/365

I’ve spent many holidays talking people through stuff when its gone wrong.

Nope but I’ve worked in VC backed tech startups and media, both of which are 24/7 if people allow it, and resultingly both sectors have HUGE amounts of burnout, staff attrition and mental health problems. It’s all about regaining control, accepting you can’t do everything and prioritising the workload to suit your needs.

Loving the Heather Small board.

It seems that an awful lot of people are starting to crack around the edges at the moment with the pace of modern life. It seems we’ve managed to now fill every available time slot with always on comms so there is little space left just to be 🙁

Hope you find a solution that leaves you feeling good about yourself and back in control

Been there myself very recently. Moved from driving lorries to routing them every day. I was responsible for routing and dealing with 50+ drivers pretty much on my own every day. Had countless chats with the boss to try and rectify the situation.

The guy I worked with did very little to assist me and sometime went out his way to be awkward. Has numerous fallouts with drivers and was verbally abused on a weekly basis.. im not one to sit back and be walked over so made sure I put my point across.. but nobody should be verbally abused and personally insulted at work.

Added to that the arrival of our little girl after a difficultly labour I was totally exhausted. I found myself sitting at my desk and my hands shaking and stomach churning, couldn’t switch off or sleep, had no energy to do any exercise and lost interest in everything, had splitting headaches and felt in a bad place.

Came to a head one day and I called the doctor to make an appointment. He wanted to see me that day. When I got there I told him how I was feeling, he reassured me that I wasn’t depressed or going mental but that I was suffering sever stress, anxiety and I was burnt out and heading for a breakdown. He signed me off for 2 weeks there and then. Took the line back to work and handed it in.. the relief I felt was unbelievable. I was like a new man the next day. Spent some quality time with my wife and baby girl, rode my motorbike and road bike and just pottered about the doors.

Had a chat on the phone with my boss who basically blamed it all on me… the day before I was due to go back to see the doctor and my boss about returning to work I was feeling all uptight and nervous again. When I spoke to the doctor he said he knew I wouldn’t be ready to go back to work after 2 weeks as I was in a bad way when he saw me originally. He signed me off again.

I had another week off then went in to see my boss, end result was I said I wasn’t prepared to come back Into the office and that I wanted back on the road.

I was treated like shit for a few weeks as a form of punishment but I was happy to be back on the road so knew it would improve.. which it has massively.

End result, I spent months questioning my own mental health, feeling like I was depressed, wondering if I should just up sticks and disappear, I thought I was making it all up and it was all in my head. I always used to think most people with “mental health issues” were making it up.. particularly those suffering stress or anxiety.

Having been there recently I can completely understand the consequences of doing nothing, get some time off work and speak to somebody about how your feeling. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or admit when your having a bad day. It does get better but you have to make the first step and speak to your GP, have a break from work and if needed move on from your current position.

Apologies for the long post, first time I have written down my experience, that’s the short version aswell!!

I remember a few months ago I started a topic asking for help on here.. then promptly deleted it as I felt stupid for posting.. so well done for posting your feelings and state of mind. Takes courage by the bucket load. Took me another 2 months to admit I had an issue.

Hope it all works out for you.

Nobodyofthegoat wrote

My annual (for the last ~24 years) SAD is hitting me for six currently, not helped by having a head cold that has appeared to go and then come back over the last almost four weeks now. Sometimes I feel like there is a light chest infection going on, so I’ve cut my training and general rides right back

You’re me and I claim my five pounds. My head cold has been going on for weeks now, but I don’t think it’s being helped by my state of mind, which in turn has not been helped by turning 50.

Roll on Spring.

Vickypea, when you posted last winter about how you were feeling, it seemed to me from some of the things that you said, that you are a very driven person who seeks to keep busy all the time, achieve goals and generally ‘do’ things.

i normally “treat” my anxiety by riding my bike really hard but that’s not good when I’m not sleeping.
I love drawing and painting so I think I’ll treat myself to doing some of that over the weekend.

Drawing and painting sound good, but what about also spending some time just doing nothing – no activity or pastime, just chill out and do nothing for a morning, afternoon or even the whole day/weekend. Go to a nice coffee shop for a couple of hours and sit by the window and watch the world go by.

it seemed to me from some of the things that you said, that you are a very driven person who seeks to keep busy all the time, achieve goals and generally ‘do’ thing

Slowster, that’s exactly what my counsellor said yesterday. We talked about not giving 100% all the time because that leads to exhaustion. I agree and need to slow down, it’s just that I feel so bloody awful now that I’m kicking myself for not seeing it earlier

tjagain – Member

NOpe mr Overshoot – thats nothing to do with the type of job – thats poor management and you allowing yourself to be used. Work your contracted hours and no more.

I’ll say it again you haven’t worked in food manufacturing then, contracted hours don’t exist as such & I am management and right up to top line director will often end up working all hours.
I have a team of engineers that often need to call me day or night for tech support and if they cant sort it I am the person that has to sort it out & if I don’t then lots of people are potentially looking at finding another job as we will be closed.

Oh and Andy our isn’t 24/7 if we allow it it is 24/7 with profit margins in the 2% bracket so any hold up means a loss, I really don’t think many people understand the effect our major multiples have had on whole swathes of industry!

MrOvershoot you remind me of one of my uncles twenty odd years ago.
His work simply wouldn’t manage without him, a big housebuilding firm which required him to be at their beck and call 24/7.

After he had some enforced time off due to several heart attacks, the company went bust.
Only joking, someone stepped in to replace him and they carried on building houses as if he had never existed.

I’m self employed so find it hard to step back and say no, but it’s getting easier. Life carries on, the world keeps spinning, and I keep making a living.